Woman Snubbed By Husband's Family For 'Replacing' His Ex, She Refuses To Visit Them For Years

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abbyadler
Dec 10, 2021 12:30 PM EST

The ideal situation is to transition seamlessly into a significant other's family after marriage. Sadly, this doesn't always happen in an ideal way, and there's plenty of family drama to go around as a result. In today's 'Am I The  A$$hole?' post, OP shared how nasty his mom and sister were to his wife when they first met her. Apparently, they loved his ex so much that they didn't want to accept his new significant other in the family. After they snubbed her a second time, she refused to come to any family events anymore, and OP understood. However, eight years later, a family member got cancer, and OP thought the family would come together. His wife helped out but still refused to come over in person. At first, OP was mad that his wife was still uncomfortable about the drama that happened so long ago, but when Redditors pointed out that his family members never apologized for their behavior, he finally saw the light and stood by his wife's decision. 

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  • 01
    Hair - Posted by u/kahoots21 2 days ago 3 3 AITA for asking my spouse to forgive my mom and my sister?
    via u/kahoots21

    Let's dive right in, ladies and gents. 

  • 02
    Font - I have been married to my wife for 8 years. The very first day my family met her,my mom turned her back to her and ignored her, and my sister came out asking if she was ever going to see the triplets again.(my ex girlfriend had kids from a previous relationship.) I was so damn pissed and embarrassed, but my SO handled it like a champ and acted like nothing. When we got home, she cried and was really disappointed. She had been looking forward to meeting everyone. I texted both my mom and s
    via u/kahoots21

    This poor woman was bullied by his family for no reason. 

  • 03
    Font - I took my SO to my moms for thanksgiving and Christmas and my mom and sister were still standoffish. After we left, my SO said she didn't want to go over anymore and I promised her she wouldn't. I asked her to marry me a few months after and we didn't invite any of my family to our ceremony. Not her choice, she said I was more than welcome to but I didn't think my family deserved to be there. Then my mom found out, and reached out and asked if we would like to have dinner. My SO encourage
    via u/kahoots21
  • 04
    Font - My wife has stayed away but does help me buy gifts for everyone's birthdays, and holidays and goes with me to visit my grandparents. Now, my sisters daughter was diagnosed with cancer this month. My wife has been incredibly helpful and has assisted in anyway possible and I was hoping this would lead to everyone forgetting the past. I asked my wife if she'd consider coming around to my moms and she refused. I told her I didn't understand why, all this drama was 8 years ago and she was doin
    via u/kahoots21
  • 05
    Font - c· 2 days ago 24 4 3 Commander in Cheeks [228] YTA. Your wife is a saint for helping out and being kind when the situation obviously calls for it, but she doesn't have to forgive people who treated her like shit for years and years - and it's extremely unsupportive for you to keep asking her to.
    via u/NUT-me-SHELL
  • 06
    Font - Momtotherescue · 2 days ago · edited 20 hr. ago & 35 More Plus it should be noted that his mom and sister have not apologize, so honestly there is nothing to forgive. Now if they apologized, that opens the door for a conversation... first time posting, and awesome support! Thank you!
    via uMomtotherescue
  • 07
    Font - sickofdriving007 · 2 days ago · edited 2 days ago S Certified Proctologist [21] You are the biggest A hole. Did your mom or sister ever bother apologizing to your wife? Sounds like they continued their shitty behavior toward her even after you called them out on it.
    via u/sickofdriving007
  • 08
    Font - JeepNaked · 2 days ago Colo-rectal Surgeon [36] YTA Yes, you are an asshole. You promised her she didn't have to go back. So why are you trying to make her now?
    via u/JeepNaked
  • 09
    Font - MultiFazed · 2 days ago · edited 2 days ago Commander in Cheeks [211] ESH (except your wife) You say in the comments that your mother and sister have never apologized, and you seem to be very certain that they never will. Why should your wife forgive them for something like that when they're not even sorry that they did it?
    via u/MultiFazed
  • 10
    Font - hBoBh · 2 days ago Asshole Enthusiast [6] comm'on man. if her family treated you like that, how would you feel if she then pressured you to still have contact w/ them, and they never apologized? YTA
    via u/hBoBh
  • 11
    Human body - Representative_Ask10 · 2 days ago YTA. Have they done anything to earn forgiveness?
    via u/Representative_Ask10
  • 12
    Font - Ab828 · 2 days ago Certified Proctologist [28] YTA- she has been more than gracious to your family by helping but she is absolutely right. You raised your voice? You are such an asshole. You should apologize and realize sometimes bridges get burned and you wife is extremely kind and generous to be cordial enough to help.
    via u/Ab828
  • 13
    Font - UPDATE- THANK YOU ALL FOR OPENING MY EYES, IVE NEVER FELT SO ATTACKED HAHA BUT IM GRATEFUL FOR IT ALL. I HAVE TOTALLY CHANGED MY WAY OF THINKING. MY WIFE IS AMAZING AND THE LAST THING I WANT IS TO TAKE HER AROUND PEOPLE WHO DONT HAVE HER BEST INTERESTS AT HEART. UNFORTUNATELY, IT TOOK ADVICE FROM STRANGERS FOR ME TO SEE.
    via u/kahoots21
  • 14
    Font - NONETHELESS, I AM THANKFUL. I CANT REPLY TO EVERYONE, I HAVE A LOT OF MAKING UP TO DO. MY WIFE HAS READ SO MANY COMMENTS AND WOULD LIKE YOU ALL TO KNOW SHE IS VERY THANKFUL TO SEE SO MUCH SUPPORT. SHE SAYS SHES ALWAYS FELT GUILTY ABOUT STAYING AWAY BUT FEELS BETTER ABOUT HER DECISION. AT THE END OF THE DAY, MY WIFE DESERVES PEACE AND I WILL NOT FORCE HER TO DO ANYTHING SHE DOESNT LIKE. SHE IS PRETTY GLEEFUL RIGHT NOW, LOL. THANK YOU ALL!!! EDIT- changed some stuff for privacy.
    via u/kahoots21

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aita marriage drama exes family
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