Father Forces Teenaged Daughter To Dump Her BF Because College Is More Important

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LiterallyLily17
Jan 25, 2022 1:30 PM EST

The OP in this story is a caring father. He supports his daughter's dream of being a marine biologist. Her boyfriend on the other hand is not. They are both young and possibly 'in love.' But OP makes it sound like his daughter's boyfriend is just a manipulative a$$hole. OP's daughter asked if she could have money from her college fund to help support her boyfriend's 'dreams.' Naturally OP shut that down real quick and wasn't gentle about it. His daughter burst into tears. She broke up with the boyfriend after their talk and now he feels guilty. Who do you think is the a$$hole? 

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  • 01
    Font - AITA for telling my daughter she can't use her college money on her bf, which caused her to break up with him?
    via u/throwae_69
  • 02
    Plant - I know that the title paints me as the total AH, but please hear me out. My (47f) daughter Sara (18f) is a very smart girl. She has a 4.0 GPA, she's valedictorian of her class, and she's just gotten word from her dream college that she has received a full ride scholarship. We have a college fund for
    via u/throwae_69
  • 03
    Organism - her of about 250,000. When we found out about the scholarship, we agreed that we would still give her the money to pay for other things that she would need in college, such as housing, food, etc. Well she came home yesterday kind of sad. I asked her what was the matter. She said that she was not going to go to college anymore. Apparently, her boyfriend Bryan (19m) told her not to go anymore. Some
    via u/throwae_69
  • 04
    Font - background on Bryan, his family is VERY well off, and his parents have never issued discipline on this child. I mean, he is very rude and disrespectful, and although he seems sweet to my daughter when they are alone, she'll complain that whenever they're out with friends, Bryan is constantly
    via u/throwae_69
  • 05
    Font - putting her down and comparing her to Instagram models. Bryan is currently enrolled in college, but he has no set course for his future. He's just "rolling with the cards" as Sara says. Some other background info is that my daughter is going to school for marine biology. Well, with what my daughter told me about their conversation, She was telling
    via u/throwae_69
  • 06
    Font - Bryan about her full ride scholarship, and how excited she was to finally go to school for marine biology (he's never supported her dream of being a marine biologist and has always told her to go to college for a "REAL" job) when he sat her down and told her to not go to college at all. He told her to wait for him here in our town, and don't worry about
    via u/throwae_69
  • 07
    Font - getting a job even, because his parents will support her, and that he didn't feel comfortable with her going to college out of state and so far away. He also said that it made him feel unmanly when she has a set course for her future which will give her a good life, while he has none. After she told me what was going on, I didn't make a decision right away, but I knew that I wasn't going to just let my daughter throw away
    via u/throwae_69
  • 08
    Font - her future like this. She then asked me for her college fund so she could help support Bryan's dreams(?) So I took time to think, and I sat her down today. I told her that she can not have her college fund to spend on Bryan. She started freaking out asking why and it was her money, and I asked her to listen. I asked her if she actually could see a serious future with Bryan in it. She said nothing the first time, and then started crying. I asked her again more gently this time,
    via u/throwae_69
  • 09
    Font - and she admitted no while still crying. I pleaded with her to please not throw away her future for someone who she can't see herself having a life with. She then nodded and went up to her room for some time to think. From what I've learned, she broke it off with Bryan and he has been calling nom stop, crying and begging to speak to her. I feel very guilty, and sort of like an AH. Am I?
    via u/throwae_69
  • 10
    Font - No, no it does not. It paints you as a responsible parent, and the first thing I thought was "absolutely not". But then, I read about halfway into your post, and I realized that I was right. You're absolutely NTA. The truth of the matter is that Bryan is toxic and abusive. She absolutely loves him, but he clearly doesn't love her, because he's willing to wreck her future in order to feel in control. You did the right thing. You're a wonderful parent. At the end of the day, most men will c
    via u/SpookyArmadillo

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aita drama toxic father daughter college fund dreams askreddit tension family Reddit money toxic relationship college Father
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