Tumblr Animal Posts Of Hilarity And Funny Stories

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    Font - inkskinned sometimes i'm like "why am i still here" but then i realize that i'm often the only person who is around to take bad-to-eat stuff out of my dog's mouth and i think there's this sort of western idea of "if youre not CEO youre nothing special" but my dog is still alive bc of me and i'm still| alive bc of other people so maybe i'm just here to pet cats and wear sweaters and help people take the glass out of their mouth. you know? maybe i won't be CEO but maybe i'll be able to help
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  • 02
    Font - mulberrydyke Follow My cat's name makes her vet bills look like fucked up breakfast orders 1/24/2022 Intraoperative Iv/fluids Webecca 1/24/2022 Anesthesia General Webecca 1/24/2022 Anesthesia Electronic Monitoring Webecca 1/24/2022 Rabies Webecca 1/24/2022 Dental Prophylaxis Everything Bagel 1/24/2022 Exam Pre-surgical Everything Bagel 1/24/2022 Intraoperative Iv/fluids Everything Bagel Anesthesia General Everything Bagel Anesthesia Electronic Monitoring Everything Bagel Blood Profile-Che
  • 03
    Font - lesbianshepard African penguin From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia The African penguin (Spheniscus demersus), also known as the jackass penguin what did these penguins do to the scientists to deserve this lesbianshepard researcher: okay so we're calling these "african penguins" because it lives in africa penguin: bites researcher researcher: hey fucker guess what new idea
  • 04
    Font - spyglassrealms Follow yeah. as a part time zookeeper myself? yeah. my brother, who also works at the zoo, once overheard a guest remark with maximum confidence that our polar bear was an animatronic. when asked why the hell he thought as much, this guy. oh my god this fucking guy. without HESITATING he replied that "polar bears are made up by the government for global warming propaganda." I just can't stand how stupid some people are.
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  • 05
    Font - kaffeekatze Follow We once stood at the penguin exhibit at our local Zoo and overheard a conversation of two teen-ish girls: "Whats those colored bracelets they put on their wings??" "It's so they don't fly away!" I absolutely fucking lost it, I couldn't cover my face or get away fast enough so they noticed me just laughing crying, poor girls, I'm sorry but what ee
  • 06
    Cat - kaible "He's behind me making that fucking face again. I don't even have to turn around to know it. God damn it. I hate that goddamned stupid face he makes. God fucking damnit." ursik-l (--) (•D)
  • 07
    Leaf - furbearingbrick DEPLOY THE BOY diet-poison Boy: Deployed
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  • 08
    Hand - Rocky ran up to me, gave me this pebble, and did a flirty little dance while making happy noises. Which is the rooster equivalent of a proposal. A truly devastating blow to my boyfriend. The man who helped raise him. Source: 6madfae
  • 09
    Carnivore - slowroar he begged "no more' but the holy hand ignored his plea
  • 10
    Mouth - marisatomay Follow toi ano einstürzende neuböltön, esq. @AmbJohnBolton @toi_ano is he. you know 4:44 PM 5/12/21 - Twitter Web App 6:51 PM 501/21. Twitter for iPhone my brain feels like it's on fire and my stomach hurts because i can't stop laughing every time i see these two tweets
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  • 11
    Organism - caecilius-est-pater Follow I'm actually glad we don't live in an RPG world. We really take for granted being able to coexist with most animals. I don't wanna have to pull out a longsword and beat the shit out of six crabs and two snails while a starfish snipes me with magic bullets every time I go to the beach. 174,232 notes
  • 12
    Nose - molabuddy Follow 9! wehen kittys are just so baby they dont even look like kitty yet they look like this. look at this post with your eyes if you agree 46,400 notes
  • 13
    Table - stupidpetface punkfaery O ye of little face
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  • 14
    Font - memeufacturing a person from 150 years ago would be terrified by modern stuff. however, a duck from 150 years ago would just be all like ,still got lakes? yes ? okay cool elodieunderglass "How fleeting are all human passions compared with the massive continuity of ducks." - Dorothy L. Sayers, Gaudy Night (1935) chatdomestique Reblogging again because I thought they changed the quote so I decided to look up the actual quote and it's not fake that is very much the actual quote

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