'Our cat didn't break the towel rack. I did': 20+ Secrets so outrageous people could never tell their significant other about it

Author image for Remy Millisky
Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Apr 8, 2023 3:00 PM EDT

Everyone keeps secrets from their significant other, but not everyone would fess up to secretly letting the dog snooze on the bed, or devouring "nine cans of ravioli" when their S.O.'s not around. Thankfully, these folks did for our amusement!

"What's a secret you'll never tell your partner but are willing to tell strangers on Reddit?" one person asked the r/AskReddit sub, and answers of all types poured in. Commenters shared everything from the mundane everyday life secrets to things that would totally end a relationship immediately. 

After you check out these wild confessions, click here to read about one amazing boss who stood up for his employee when she was being shouted at by a customer. 

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    Cheezburger Image 9751600896
    via JACQUELINE BRANDWAYN on Unsplash
  • 02
    Product - r/AskReddit. Posted by u/Bisexual_Space_Lover 10 1512 15 2 What's a secret you'll never tell your partner but are willing to tell strangers on Reddit?
    via u/Bisexual_Space_Lover
  • 03
    Font - Pantominist One time we had half a container of ice cream left. I had a craving. I ate a bowl, then another. Then I decided to finish the tub to destroy the evidence. Then I realized she would notice that there was no ice cream left. So I went to the store, bought another tub, and then ate that one down to the same level. This was a GALLON tub.
    via u/Pantominist
  • 04
    Font - [deleted] 3F & 11 More My best friend is a Badger and I feed him sweetcorn every morning at 5:20am EDIT: Wow this really blew up..me and my badger friend Lucius appreciate all the support
    via u/deleted
  • 05
    Font - Jayce2K Who wants to admit they ate nine cans of ravioli
    via u/Jayce2K
  • 06
    Goggles - RimmaSwann That my wife always screams, she just doesn't seem to be able to talk at a normal level. Feel like she should be selling fish at a market place...... Love her though.
    via u/RimmaSwann
  • 07
    Font - tygloalex 3 S When I was 14, my grandma passed away. For years, I had been bothering my parents for my own gold necklace. Well, Gram had a little bit of money and she gave me the $300 for a gold necklace in her will. It was my pride and joy. I had it around my neck for 17 years before I met my wife. It was off my neck maybe three times in those 17 years. My wife (then girlfriend) knew how much it meant to me and asked to wear it once. Well, it never came home. She had lost it somewhere or
    via u/tygloalex
  • 08
    Font - Inevitably, I gave up, but she was very bothered by it all. So, I decided to go to a pawn shop and buy the closest I could get to an exact duplicate and then I told her that I had found the necklace in the couch cushions. To this day, she thinks that I found my necklace from my grandmother, but this is actually version 2.
    via u/tygloalex
  • 09
    Font - [deleted] Whenever she's not home, I let the dog onto the bed and take a really comfy nap. I set an alarm for an hour and kick the dog off and clean the fur off before she ever gets home. I've been doing this for nearly 3 years now.
    via u/deleted
  • 10
    Font - Gingee_Ninjee Sometimes when we play mariokart, I pretend to fail at the end so she can win
    via u/Gingee_Ninjee
  • 11
    Smile - Whispers OfPorcelain That I am the one placing the googly eyes on everything in our house not our six year old.
    via u/WhispersOfPorcelain
  • 12
    Font - Oaty_McOatface I've broken your personalize cup your sister got you three times. I recreated the design on paint and got some screen printing stall at the mall to print it on the cup, each time it looks a little bit different
    via u/Oaty_McOatface
  • 13
    Font - Virtual-Beach305 I will listen to a song 10 times in a row because I need to listen to all the instruments and melodies separately before moving on to the next song
    via u/Virtual-Beach305
  • 14
    Font - KasKat35 2 & 12 More My husband loves talkative cats. When we first got our kittens I gave them a treat every time they made a meow or chirp. Since I was working from home they ended up becoming very vocal. He still goes on about how lucky we are to have such talkative cats in a weekly basis
    via u/KasKat35
  • 15
    Font - Fat_Russell Crowe It was an accident we met. I thought I was agreeing to see his friend, who was the other guy in the picture
    via u/Fat_Russell_Crowe
  • 16
    Font - TheBeale That I wish she would find a career or pursue a degree so I don't have to work 1000+ hours of OT a year so she can sit at home.
    via u/TheBeale
  • 17
    Font - CocktailOnion Sometimes I just sit in my car outside work or our apartment for 20-30 minutes because I need some time alone. I have my mind full to the brim at work and rarely get time in the house alone. Sometimes I just need it to be quiet and not have to pay attention to anything! S2
    via u/CocktailOnion
  • 18
    Font - TeeMannn 2 2 32 The reason i wasnt hungry that one day in dublin was because when i stayed behind to get ready while she waited in the lobby i ate the entire box of leftover chicken wings that we took home from the restaurant the day before. I ate 15 cold, oily chicken wings in about 5 minutes at 9 AM before heading out for breakfast.
    via u/TeeMannn
  • 19
    Font - 3 2 Nightmare2828 When I play video games and my wife isnt here, I narrate what I do and respond to fake questions from a non-existant chat like I'm some kind of big shot streamer. I even look at a fake camera when something happen lol.
    via u/Nightmare2828
  • 20
    Font - BO Fandi Billy 22 2 2 Our cat didn't break the towel rack. I did. I was pretending to be fighting zombies and grabbed it and... ripped the god da thing off the wall. I heard her coming to check out the noise and looked down at my cat. She came into the bathroom to me asking my cat "Why did you think the towel rack could hold your weight? You silly cat!"
    via u/FandiBilly
  • 21
    Font - Sturm2k Last night you made fried rice with shrimp. I ate the whole bowl even though it tasted nasty. God it was awful.
    via u/Sturm2k
  • 22
    Font - Jack7074 Every time we're playing Yahtzee and she asks "do I have one more roll or was that 3" I always say one more regardless of the truth
    via u/Jack7074
  • 23
    Font - PS_F YouJenny That time I asked you if I could have the last cookie, I implied there was only one left when there was actually two. I wanted both of them and didn't want to share. They were delicious and I have no regrets.
    via u/PS_F***YouJenny
  • 24
    Font - beefkingsley My nieces don't like the aquarium. I just constantly took them there because I thought my now girlfriend, who works there, was pretty and thought if she saw me constantly taking them it'd lead to us talking.
    via u/beefkingsley
  • 25
    Font - Yoguifungi My wife's makeup looked terrible on our wedding day. 1.1k Share PredictBaseballBot Bury that one my dude
    via u/Yoguifungi

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opinion anonymous secret pets askreddit relationships confession food
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