Come one, come all, and hear about our amazing cure-all! No longer do you have to suffer the regular aches and pains of day-to-day life, for we have a fabulously floofy solution for all of your problems! Go on down to your favorite farm-acy and ask for Kittenessence, the brand new product from Meowdicine International that heals you with the power of pure kitten love!
That's right, kitten love! We've found a way to replicate the magical effects of a kitten nuzzling, cuddling, and giving lil kitten kisses, and then combine those three into one ameowzing cure-all. Like literally cure-all. It cures everything. Broken arms, scratches, heartbreak, anxiety, death, toothache, debt, weak knees, and much, much more.
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Behold, the young prince Mittens up in his mighty tower, where he studies the way of the meownarch, boding his time until he can one day be king, unlike other certain feline princes who sing about it…. looking at you Simba.
Welcome to the new trend called E-kittens, where adorable kittens play videogames and hoomans watch because it's adorable, especially since it's basically just kittens attempting to knead biscuit dough on a controller.
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