Dealing with resentful kids is something most step parents have to go through, and every parent should understand that a child may need time to adjust to a new parental figure in their life. But when a kid never grows out of this resentment, it can cause huge problems in the family. u/ProfessionalHornet72 explains that her stepson never liked her, and made it blatantly clear that he would never consider her a parent. For years, he alienated everyone in his family, that is until it became convenient for him to suddenly have a relationship with his stepmom.
"Husband has a low contact also but it is due to different reason. He didn't have a great relationship with his siblings but they tolerated each-other. Nicks mom said I am out and basically gave up her rights. I have never talked to her and I don't think the youngest has even talked to her. I have no idea what she is up to" —OP
"INFO: what is the 'different reason' his father is LC? Did something happen during childhood… maybe before you came into their lives?" —u/sarah_schmara
"He trashed his hunting cabin and refused to pay for the damages." —OP
"He went to the wedding, he put his foot down on Christmas and told him he can come but I will be there or not come. He didn't come to the event" —OP
"It sounds like Nick is acting like a petulant child. I would expect that sort of thing when he was a kid, but as a grown a** adult he really should know better (obvious caveat is that we have no idea how you treate(ed) him and can only go by the fact that your have a good relationship with the other kids). But it sounds like his father needs to step in here and have a chat with him." —u/medium_buffalo_wings
"I'm not his mother, never will be is his words. He is the middle child, he never would give me examples but I am too much according to him. My relationship with the other four is great. I personally think he realized he isolated himself from the family" —OP
"NTA in that case. A parent's love is unconditional, but that doesn't mean there aren't consequences to his actions. And besides, he made clear you're not his parent!" —u/zenocrate
"Agreed. Nick has no problem having no contact or telling OP to kick rocks UNTIL Nick needs something. Basically OP is a solution to his own problem not a human being that he crapped on for years, destroyed his own relationships and now is reaping what he sowed" —u/NiceRat123