22 'Dog Shower Thoughts' That'll Have You Contemplating

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  • 01
    Life is like a car ride. Sometimes you go to the vet, sometimes you go to the park, and you don't know where you're going until you get there so just enjoy the ride.
  • 02
    The only reason the mailman hasn't murdered all the humans in my house is because I bark at him. O
  • 03
    E R Human has gotten noticeably smaller since we first met... He used to be able to pick me up with one hand!
  • 04
    Who let us out?
  • 05
    We shake on so many deals, and yet I have nothing to show for it.
  • 06
    I buried my bone. It is safe now. Where is my bone.
  • 07
    I am the only thing that stands in the way of the vacuum killing my entire family.
  • 08
    Do I want to go out because I want to come back in? Or do I want to come back in because I want to go back out?
  • 09
    when the cat is Why is it ok to call me a clearly the one with the attitude problem?
  • 10
    How come I can't bring a stick inside, but my human can bring in a whole tree?
  • 11
    # What if my welcome home greetings are so good, I'm conditioning my humans to abandon me all day?
  • 12
    If master asks "Who is a good boy?" while I'm not around, is it still me?
  • 13
    LAUGH If I wasn't around, my human would end up losing dozens of balls every day.
  • 14
    Squirrels are just tennis balls thrown by God
  • 15
    KEEP CALM AND CHIVE ON Willy Wonka literally built a poison factory, and humans brought their children into it.
  • 16
    KEEP CALM AND CHIVE ON If a tree falls in a forest, and nobody is around, it's mine, I peed on it, don't touch it.
  • 17
    My human didn't give me any of his dinner, even though I haven't eaten in 12 minutes, does he hate me?
  • 18
    I DO want to go outside! How does she know?!
  • 19
    The bad thing you did does not exist if you do not look at it.
  • 20
    The fat human suddenly lost a lot of weight and brought a smaller human home.
  • 21
    Master runs slow because he only uses half of his legs.
  • 22
    If your human tells you to get off the bed, remain as still as possible, that way you become invisible

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