Happily Married Woman Sets Her ‘Well-Deserved’ Second Wedding One Day Before Cousin’s Long-Awaited Wedding

Author image for Sienna Varady
Sienna Varady
Feb 16, 2024 6:00 PM EST

A wedding is an occasion when two families come together. Weddings are a joyful occasion. But what happens if your very own cousin tries to steal your spotlight?

The story below tells the story of the disappointed bride. The Original Poster (OP) has been preparing for her wedding for the last three years, and they have sent out save-the-dates in anticipation of the big day.  OP discovers, however, that her cousin—who has been legally married for the last 15 years—has planned a vow renewal for the day before her much-anticipated wedding.

OP, quite legitimately, begged her cousin to reschedule their vow renewal, but she was instantly turned down. As a result, she opted to seek advice from her Reddit friends on what to do and how to move forward. Does she comply with her entitled cousin or does she carry out the wedding as planned?

That being said, make sure to read the story below if you're curious about the specifics of what happened! When you're done, don't forget to read the story of the bride who, in order to keep her from being disowned, demands that her bridesmaids lie to her unsupportive family on her wedding day!

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  • 01
    Last weekend they announced to the family at a get together that they were having a second wedding in September as they were now in a position where they could afford to finally celebrate their marriage with friends and family the way they wanted to. When they married originally it was just the two of them and two friends at the court house.
    via Canva
  • 02
    AITA for asking my cousin to move the date of his second wedding?
    via u/Glittering_Menu_962
  • 03
    My (29f) cousin Frankie (33m), and his wife Nora (32f) have been married almost 15 years. They got married a couple weeks after Nora's 18th birthday. Last weekend they announced to the family at a get together that they were having a second wedding in
    via u/Glittering_Menu_962
  • 04
    September as they were now in a position where they could afford to finally celebrate their marriage with friends and family the way they wanted to. When they married originally it was just the two of them and two friends at the court house. But Nora had always wanted the big
    via u/Glittering_Menu_962
  • 05
    fancy white wedding. Now usually this wouldn't be a problem, I'm happy for Frankie and Nora and excited to get to attend their wedding. However the date they've picked, is the day before my wedding. My fiance (29m) have been together for 9 years and have been planning
    via u/Glittering_Menu_962
  • 06
    our wedding for the last 3 years. We've have our date and venue booked for 2 years. Our save the dates only went out last month. When they announced their date, I asked Nora privately if they were joking with the date they had picked. Nora looked at me really confused, until I pointed
    via u/Glittering_Menu_962
  • 07
    out they were having their second wedding the day before my wedding. Nora told me that the date they'd chosen was the date they'd met in high school and it was an important date to them. Later on, Frankie asked me why I wasn't happy for them and I
    via u/Glittering_Menu_962
  • 08
    told him that it was of them to have their second wedding the day before mine. I told him that he had essentially ruined my wedding because no one is going to attend two weddings in a row on a weekend, especially not our elderly
    via u/Glittering_Menu_962
  • 09
    grandparents. Frankie apologised and said he didn't know our wedding date when they booked it. He told me that they weren't going to move the date and had the gall to suggest that I move my wedding if it matter that much to me. I snapped and told him
    via u/Glittering_Menu_962
  • 10
    that it was tacky to have a redo wedding because they decided to get married on a whim at 18 with barely a penny between. Frankie got mad with me, he and Nora left shortly after. That night Frankie and my aunt (his mom) sent me angry messages telling
    via u/Glittering_Menu_962
  • 11
    me that I know why they got married so young. Nora came from an a sive household, she was essentially the punching bag for her brother and her mother let the a se continue. They married because Nora and Frankie saw it as her only way out. My aunt
    via u/Glittering_Menu_962
  • 12
    and Frankie have since told other family members who are mostly mad that I suggested Frankie move his second wedding. Some think that given he's already married then he should move it. AITA for asking my cousin to move the date of his wedding?
    via u/Glittering_Menu_962
  • 13
    ETA: My save the dates didn't go out until last month. However, my family have been aware since we booked it. We've got a family group chat that Frankie is in and I posted it there.
    via u/Glittering_Menu_962
  • 14
    Zealousideal_End2330 6 hr. ago NTA. That is absolutely crazy behavior from your cousin who knew exactly when your wedding is and planned their big vow renewal for the day before.
    via u/Zealousideal_End2330
  • 15
    Engaging with them further won't help anything because they see absolutely nothing wrong with their actions. Just ignore them. If anyone beside Frankie, Nora, and your aunt talk to you about it just say, "I have had my wedding date planned for two years. Frankie
    via u/Zealousideal_End2330
  • 16
    and Nora were both aware of the date well in advance and save- the-dates have been sent out for my wedding to everyone I want celebrating with Fiance and I. I'm looking forward to seeing you there!" Don't say anything bad about them, don't gossip about
    via u/Zealousideal_End2330
  • 17
    them, just emphasize how much you're looking forward to your wedding. You can only control your own behavior.
    via u/Zealousideal_End2330
  • 18
    Pierre-Luc Dubois · 3 hr. ago. edited 1 hr. ago But but but they can't change the date, it was the day they met! /s His cousin sounds like a really selfish a ole, and both of them seem like classic attention seeking people.
    via u/Pierre-LucDubois
  • 19
    (Edit: Nora and Frankie, to be clear) Unfortunately there doesn't seem to be a happy ending type of solution here. And anyways how the h I is the OP supposed to change the date? Are these people stupid? It's booked. But yea I'll re- book, not have the day I
    via u/Pierre-LucDubois
  • 20
    wanted and pay the price to do so both financially and emotionally. When you have a date picked out for like 2 years and you just booked it, last thing you're going to want to do is not have your wedding on that day.
    via u/Pierre-LucDubois
  • 21
    The fact his cousin even thought it was even try asking them to change it tells me what a selfish person he is. This is the type of person who only thinks of himself. appropriate to
    via u/Pierre-LucDubois
  • 22
    Pretty certain it would be way easier for him to have changed the date. It's like he chose the date on purpose to steal their thunder.
    via u/Pierre-LucDubois
  • 23
    bluefluffyunicorn15 1 hr. ago . Even if the date is so extremely important to them, they have been married for almost 15 years and they purposefully chose the year to have a second wedding to be the year OP is having her first wedding the day after. They could have waited another year. That's just . Absolutely NTA. SO
    via u/bluefluffyunicorn15
  • 24
    Significant_Echo2924 12 min. ago Am I crazy or remembering the specific day they met (in HS?) 15 years ago sounds sus as f k?
    via u/bluefluffyunicorn15
  • 25
    8a Deucalion666 · 7 hr. ago Supreme Court Just- s [107] NTA and you're about to find out who your real family members are.
    via u/Deucalion666
  • 26
    dncrmom 5 hr. ago A ole Enthusiast [5] NTA and your grandparents should prioritize a first wedding over a vow renewal. Anyone missing your wedding is the AH along with your cousin.
    via u/dncrmom
  • 27
    AlgaeFew8512 31 min. ago I would never attend a vow renewal unless I didn't know that's what it was. They are right up there with gender reveal parties in terms of needless. I'd rather stay home. Vow renewals just scream "someone cheated" to me. I know that isn't always the case and there are other reasons for them, but I can't help but think it anyway
    via u/AlgaeFew8512
  • 28
    Ok_Albatross8909 - 5 hr. ago Partassipant [3] I wonder if they're having a second wedding because your wedding planning has made them jealous, and this is the last move to spite you tbh
    via u/Ok_Albatross8909

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