32 Witty Memes for the Bickering, Nagging Old Married Couples (March 21, 2024)

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  • 01
    Marriage And Martinis @MarriageMartini Tonight my husband and I went out for drinks. The bartender asked to see ID and as I pulled out my license he looked at me and said, "not you, just him." And honestly. the whole thing felt like the first scene of a Netflix true crime documentary.
  • 02
    WHEN I'M VENTING ABOUT MOTHERHOOD AND SOMEONE TELLS ME TO REMEMBER HOW BLESSED I AM TO BE A MOM @thehiddensnacksmama THAT'S NOT THE VIBE.
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  • 03
    Coley @ColeyTangerina In every partnership, there is a person who stacks the dishwasher like a Scandinavian architect and a person who stacks the dishwasher like a racoon on meth.
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  • 04
    When I tell my husband he upset me, and he apologizes without it taking three days, four arguments and me crying twice. K
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  • 05
    Marriage And Martinis @MarriageMartini Hear me out, a national holiday celebrating female friendships. When besties are required to go to a mimosa brunch in pajamas, snuggle together on the couch watching rom coms, and remind one another how incredible we are and that we could never do life without each other.
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  • 06
    trash jones @jzux happy international women's day to anyone i've met in a bar bathroom. you are all my sisters now
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  • 07
    when the deep cleaning motivation wears off mid way & now you're just sitting in the room like this
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  • 08
    Ok, serious debate... 1 2 3
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  • 09
    Q: How old are you? A: Old enough to remember when Kim Cattrall was a mannequin IG:@shepensblog IG:@shepensblog
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  • 10
    Marriage And Martinis @MarriageMartini My husband, comfy in bed. Lights out, 80% asleep. Me: (sits up and hovers over him) "Babe, I was just thinking....do you think we're good parents?"
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  • 11
    This too shall pass. And then some other will come and take its place. It never ends.
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  • 12
    Marriage And Martinis @MarriageMartini Sometimes I ask my partner a question, and even after 25 years, his response is so different from what I was expecting. It's such a huge reminder that we have to constantly keep getting to know one another - all the changing, deeper parts that get lost in the daily chaos of life. >
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  • 13
    mommy MommyCocktail kai @MommyCocktail I've been married so long that my husband is mad that I ate a quesadilla in the fridge but is fine that I'll be out of town for his birthday.
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  • 14
    MomTransparenting @momtransparent1 > Bribed my 9YO w $5 to clean up so I could shower. When I got out, he was done, so I gave him a 5. He asked for singles & passed $2 to my 5YO & shoved $3 into his pocket. 5 proudly announced she did the chores. He watched TV. I can't decide if he's a genius or a • monster.
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  • 15
    Marriage And Martinis @MarriageMartini My husband and I are away for the night and I just looked over and said, "ok, I'm ready for a huge- dessert." No joke, he said, "you go ahead, I'm full." And this is why girls' nights are absolutely essential....my ride or dies would NEVER do me wrong like that.
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  • 16
    WHAT I WHAT I WHAT I LOOK LOOK LIKE LOOK LIKE LIKE THE WHILE I'M WHEN I NEXT DAY GETTING MY LEAVE THE WHEN I DO HAIRCUT SALON MY HAIR @mommywinetime
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  • 17
    Who is your green? Green is someone who randomly became a part of your life one day and saved you; that you now cannot imagine a life without. Someone you know you can tell anything to without being judged because they'll always support you, no matter what.
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  • 18
    No Idea: Daddy Blog @byclintedwards My wife asked me to grab her something from the hotel breakfast, and when I asked for suggestions, she said "you know what I like." I've never been so scared in my whole life. >
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  • 19
    caitie delaney ❤ @caitiedelaney Do we all have that friend that when you go out with them it feels like they're a local politician who knows everyone on earth and you're their weird mute friend who just left the house for the first time in 8 years and is learning to smile again
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  • 20
    Marriage And Martinis @MarriageMartini FYI, when your teenager texts "please pick me up now," they actually mean "please drive to where I am and wait in your car for 20 minutes while I ignore your texts." But the best part is when they finally come outside and react to your death stare with, "what? What's the matter?"
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  • 21
    Mommy Needs A Life @mom_needsalife To the woman in Old Navy who just whispered "are you kidding me" to her toddler laying on the floor screaming, I see you. I am you.
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  • 22
    Lady Lawya @Parkerlawyer My parents have been married 60 years. My mom told me she has been giving my dad the same Valentine's Day card for TWENTY years. And the beauty is he has no idea. He reads it in its entirety every year. And then she puts it back in a drawer for next year. Freaking genius.
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  • 23
    Marriage And Martinis @MarriageMartini Invest in your marriage. We are so willing to spend on houses, cars, and our kids' activities. But then we skimp on vacations alone with our spouse, sitters for date night, and romantic gestures. But if we are willing to put the money and time in, the return will be amazing.
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  • 24
    uh lee uh @staytrillhill How do I become a stay at home? Not a mom. Just a stay at home. No. work or anything.
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  • 25
    Me: I'm not gonna yell as much this year. Me, 7 hours later: RAMBLIN MAMA >
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  • 26
    Intimacy isn't just about . It's having heart-to-hearts, going on dates, dancing, cuddling, sharing childhood memories, thoughts, fears, dreams & hopes for the future. It's uncontrollable laughter, direct eye contact & feeling each other without touching-it's exchanging energy.
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  • 27
    When your husband and his best friend ensure the drinks are flowing during "book club" ل TikTok @jessi.meeks
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  • 28
    Plan Dates With The Effort You Plan Your Fantasy Football >
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  • 29
    What are you starting to dislike more as you get older?
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  • 30
    Please settle a debate.... should I put my new sign in the kitchen, or above my bed? @marriageandmartinis MANY HAVE EATEN HERE few have died
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  • 31
    Looking through the fridge for what to make for dinner knowing well I'm gonna be ordering a pizza in five minutes.
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  • 32
    Megan Lane @meganroselane The discomfort we feel when we see another woman dancing, singing, expressing herself, walking confidently, crying, sharing her truth, making money, loving herself... it belongs to us. Our discomfort is not a demand for her to be smaller. It's a call for us to heal.
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