‘How dare you decide what I do for the baby’: Uninvolved Father Expects to Decide What Method of Birth His Girlfriend Should Do, She Tells Him Off For Not Even Being Involved

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Mar 29, 2024 3:00 PM EDT

Welcome back ladies, feminists, and females of Mother Nature. Speaking of Mother Nature, she's the earthly and cosmic energy that nurtures, nourishes, and gives livelihood to all living things. The greenery draped outside all the buildings, the compact trees growing in an endless forest, and the chaos of the ocean waves are all encompassed under the goddess tapestry of Mother Nature. 

When was the last time a man tried to give a woman advice or dictation about what she should do with her very delicate and vulnerable body? Unfortunately, too often for comfort. When a woman becomes pregnant, although the father should or could be involved with the decision making process, it doesn't mean that he has to be, or that his opinion has to be the one that she executes. Ultimately, it's her body. The man involved has to take responsibility for his actions, but knows that it's her body her choice. We're all adults here, we may as well act like it. Enjoy this juicy Reddit piece about feminism and the decision about what to do with one's body. 

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  • 01
    r/AITAH 13 hr. ago • Successful-Poem-6254 Aitah for telling my boyfriend he doesn't get a say in this part of my pregnancy?
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 02
    AITA for telling my boyfriend he doesn't get a say in this part of my pregnancy? Me (23F) and my boyfriend (23M) have been together for about a year now and I'm 5 months along in my pregnancy.
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 03
    I found out I was pregnant a little after Thanksgiving (Nov 2023). I was ecstatic as I have PCOS and wasn't sure I'd even be able to conceive, even though this wasn't planned. When I broke the news to my boyfriend his reaction was a little less than stellar and he
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 04
    essentially told me he wasn't ready to be a father. The next month or two he hasn't been involved in my pregnancy but I'm fortunate to have supportive parents and family. I told him from the beginning the door is always open as I wouldn't deny
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 05
    my baby the chance to know their dad Around mid January he told me he wants to be involved in the baby's life and has been going to appointments with me and my mom, going over names with me, and all of those things. This is
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 06
    where things get complicated. I've been thinking about my birth plan, doing a lot of researching and talking with my doctor and I've narrowed it down to two options which are natural with an epidural or a water birth.
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 07
    A few weeks ago I talked to him about me planning to either have an epidural or go for a water birth to him and he disagreed and was adamant that I do it "naturally" I brushed this off but since then he's been pushing non stop that I do a natural birth. Saying that I'll regret it and that I
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 08
    don't need all of those drugs. It's been frustrating but part of me appreciated that he wants to be involved and was showing concern for the baby until yesterday.
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 09
    He was over at my place and the topic came up once again. He asked if I had a change of heart and agreed with him yet and I said no and that I was still debating on epidural or water birth. My last straw was when he said "it's not what's best for the baby" I was livid and said "how
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 10
    would you know what's best for them you didn't even want them" and yelled at him to get out. He's been blowing up my phone with angry texts since and so have his parents. My parents on the other hand are on my side.
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 11
    I feel bad because of what I said. I realize this is a big change for both of us and it's not just my baby but I don't know what to think. I feel maybe I was out of line or that I'm being selfish. Should I reconsider?
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 12
    Edit: thank you everyone for the feedback and advice as well... I've been reading through them when I can! I'll answer some questions soon to shed light on the situation
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 13
    I've seen some comments accusing me of "disappearing" and I just want to say I have real life obligations and this post has only been up for 1 hour I can't sit on reddit responding to all 200+ comments, I certainly wasn't expecting this many responses.
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 14
    There are a lot of comments questioning why I kept the baby, asking "why" I got pregnant (I didn't f myself), explaining forms of birth control etc etc etc ... it's condescending and unhelpful. That was not the question. This wasn't planned but this baby is
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 15
    WELCOMED by me —-End of story. ++ I'm fortunate enough to be in a position to provide and support for him/her.
    via u/Successful-Poem-6254
  • 16
    Sea-Ad9057 13h ago nta tell him when he gets pregnant he can choose his own birth plan
    via u/Sea-Ad9057
  • 17
    DeviousWhippet ⚫ 13h ago Tell him he can dictate on whether you need drugs when he out a fully- formed human NTA
    via u/DeviousWhippet
  • 18
    Mudrad 13h ago He has no idea what he's talking about. He's probably just repeating what his parents (or his mom) have told him.
    via u/Mudrad
  • 19
    You do whatever makes you comfortable. If he can't support your decision on how to get the baby out of you, imagine how difficult he's going to be with all the parenting decisions.
    via u/Mudrad
  • 20
    Do not cave to him and don't let him tell you what's best for you. Stay strong and be firm that you're not interested in his input if he's not going to support your decision. He can get on board or get out of the way.
    via u/Mudrad
  • 21
    • Caspian4136 13h ago NTA It's not his decision what happens during your labor and delivery. This is your body that is pushing a human being out.
    via u/Caspian4136
  • 22
    Having had two babies, my biggest advice to you (besides bringing a hair tie for labor lol), is to go into it with an open mind. A lot can happen during labor and a lot can change in an instant, including what you think you want. Don't be rigid in
    via u/Caspian4136
  • 23
    you want. Don't be rigid in how you want it to go because chances are, it won't happen that way.
    via u/Caspian4136
  • 24
    Unable-Selection... • 13h ago him take the drugs, tell him if he can push a lemon down his uretha you might listen to his opinion
    via u/Unable-Selection
  • 25
    peniocereusgreggii 13h ago NTA. He doesn't get a say over ANY part of your pregnancy or birth. He also doesn't know
    via u/peniocereusgreggii
  • 26
    Ambystomatigri... • 11h ago I think you need to consider a compromise here. When you're giving birth you can do it your way, and when he gives birth he can do it his way. Compromise is important in relationships! NTA obviously
    via u/Ambystomatigri

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wholesome pregnancy Female Empowerment relationships feminism lol couples love pregnant reddit thread Reddit funny dating
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