'Good luck with that': Parents try grounding adult son who's been paying rent since he was 16

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Apr 19, 2024 6:00 PM EDT

I have a bone to pick. Maybe this is because most of my life, I've been a freeloader who hasn't had to pay my own rent (shoutout to 17 years of being a child), but I don't understand when parents charge their children rent. If a person is under 18, there is no world where they should be paying their parents to live in their home; it's absolutely ludicrous. If the parents are majorly financially struggling and their adult child is a strain on their already limited resources, I could maybe see a reason to charge them rent. But if an adult child is attending college, running a business, and has a good head on their shoulders, I think it's kind of ridiculous to make them pay to sleep in their childhood bedroom. You live at home to save money, not to hemorrhage it further. The parents of this bright young Redditor didn't get that message. 

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  • 01
    020 r/AmltheAsshole u/AggravatingBat314 • 2h AITA for "being disrespectful" and telling my parents "good luck with that" when they tried to ground me?
    via u/AggravatingBat314
  • 02
    I live at home while going to university. I'm in my final year and I have a job lined up after I graduate. My parents have been charging me rent since I was 16. I have a small company that makes me about $60,000 a year. I started it in high school. It is one of the reasons I graduated early from high school and why I got attention from recruiters. My parents said that since I was earning adult money I could take in adult responsibilities.
    via u/AggravatingBat314
  • 03
    I thought that was fair. So I paid for all my own stuff starting at age 16. Not university. I got a scholarship. And the rent they charged me was minor. $300 a month. But I basically considered my room to be completely mine after that. I kept it tidy because I like it that way. But they had no say in when I cleaned it. When I did my laundry, other than to not do it at a time when I would disturb the family for example 3 AM. I bought food for myself and I ate when I wanted.
    via u/AggravatingBat314
  • 04
    They tried to say I was separating myself from the family but I saw it more as having my own schedule. This year for spring break I went down to Mexico with friends. My parents were upset because they were hosting a big Easter family get together.
    via u/AggravatingBat314
  • 05
    When I got back they said I was behaving badly by not being around for a family gathering. I said it was my last spring break in university and that I was not responsible for their schedule. They said I was grounded and I laughed and said good luck with that. I went to my room and locked the door. They tried banging on it for my attention but I'm done.
    via u/AggravatingBat314
  • 06
    My grandfather came over to talk to me later. He is the one helped me get my company started and he is always there for me. He said that I was to my parents when they were trying to be there for me. I asked him how much rent he charged my mom when she lived at home. He said it was ridiculous to think he would charge his kids rent. I told him that I had been paying rent for four years.
    via u/AggravatingBat314
  • 07
    He went into the house and I herd a fight. When he came out he said that I need to treat my parents with more respect but that since they are my landlords they do not have a say over how I spend my time. I'm avoiding my parents for now and I'm renting on Airbnb right now until I graduate. I took everything that was important to me and I left $600 for the last two months I had planned on being there.
    via u/AggravatingBat314
  • 08
    They keep calling me but I am currently getting ready to move for my new job. I don't have the energy to deal with them.
    via u/AggravatingBat314
  • 09
    HUNGWHITEBOI25 • 2h Partassipant [4] ...they tried to ground a grown adult...who pays their own bills and works full time...? Yeah youre NTA not by a long shot but...why dont's you just move out...? Legit don't see a reason for you to stay there Reply 4.4k
    via u/HUNGWHITEBOI25
  • 10
    AggravatingBat314 OP. 2h Rent was cheap. ← 1.5k B
    via u/AggravatingBat314
  • 11
    4-ton-mantis • 2h . Sometimes people give their parents more chances than they deserve to stay in their life. This may be part of it. G 586
    via u/4-ton-mantis
  • 12
    NTA Alix_Senters • 2h You pay rent and support yourself financially - at that point, you're essentially a tenant with the right to come and go as you please. It's bizarre that they're trying to ground an adult who contributes to the household, not as a dependent child, but as a contributing adult. It seems like your parents are having trouble transitioning from their roles as parental figures with a level of control to landlords who must respect your autonomy. Going away for spring break was wel
    via u/Alix_Senters
  • 13
    NTA... Odd Welcome7940 • 2h They crossed a line they drew in the sand. They treated you like an adult with all the adult responsibilities then wanted to treat you like a kid when it suited them. That doesn't work. When you hand a teen all the responsibility of being an adult some ego always follows. What did they expect? Someday you may look back and nitpick about the exact words you used to respond. I don't know your parents maybe the fully deserved those exact words. Maybe they didn't. Your ov
    via u/Odd_Welcome7940
  • 14
    loverlyone ⚫ 1h Professor Emeritass [76] Seriously. OP they likely broke the law by charging you rent at age 16. I guess FAFO is the family motto. Have it embroidered on a throw pillow for your new apartment. 144
    via u/loverlyone
  • 15
    Chewy-Vuitton44 • 2h NTA - Personally, I think its crazy that they're charging you rent (like you would an adult) and then have the audacity to A. ground you (like you would a child), and B. try to tell you where you can and can't be if you want to travel. It sounds like you have a stable income, and assuming you're responsible with your money - moving out and going to the Airbnb was smart. Take some space before things could get rocky. You're entitled to your feelings - and it sounds like they
    via u/Chewy-Vuitton44
  • 16
    durtibrizzle • 2h Nta, obviously. What's the business? Reply ✩ 161
    via u/durtibrizzle
  • 17
    AggravatingBat314 OP. 1h It started out as a drop shipping thing but turned into an import business with Chinese suppliers. 142
    via u/AggravatingBat314
  • 18
    randomwords2003 • 1h Nta, gotta respect the hustle, I get why they might be annoyed with you missing a family get together, but your so close to graduating so go celebrate, the fact they charged you for rent at 16 is stupid (but you can make some what of a agurmaent when you turn 19 if you weren't going to college) your grandpa seems cool btw 61
    via u/randomwords2003
  • 19
    'Good luck with that'
    via Anthony Fomin

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aita mother crazy things parents say grandfather parenting rent dad Grandpa reddit thread mom money Parenting Fail son parents Father Parenting FAILS
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