35 Witty Memes for the Bickering, Nagging Old Married Couples (April 24, 2024)

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  • 01
    Find a man who strokes your hair and says how soft it is and doesn't even care that it's on your legs.
  • 02
    I THINK YOU'RE LACKING A LITTLE VITAMIN ME
  • 03
    Gonna go lay under the Christmas tree until my family wakes up to remind them. that I am a gift
  • 04
    "You complete me." ВЯЧО
  • 05
    Viktor Winetrout @Cpin42 Follow My wife and I decided not to have kids. The kids are taking it pretty hard. 5:10 PM 7 Aug 2013 7,049 11,873
  • 06
    I'm too old for Netflix and chill. Now I want amazon prime and commitment
  • 07
    Therapist: what's upsetting you? Wife: he's always using common phrases incorrectly Me: cry me a table, Linda Twitter: notacroc Source: thebestoftumbli...
  • 08
    Do that thing I like Yea, one large pizza for delivery please
  • 09
    Wife: *trying to open a can of tuna* Our can opener is broken. Me: So it's a can't opener? Wife: I can't believe I married you.
  • 10
    do you like mexican because I'll wrap you in my arms and make you my baerito
  • 11
    I could never be with anyone but you because another person may not be up-to-speed on the shows we're watching. someecards
  • 12
    I've learned more about love from watching my dad reluctantly rearrange the living room so my mom can make snow angel boomerangs for her 29 Instagram followers than anything else in life
  • 13
    Me flirting: "I heard you like bad girls. I'm bad at lots of things." (Winks at you with both eyes) @Let'sNotDate
  • 14
    She found me crying, she crew too, we both crode to
  • 15
    Mary Margaret: *churns butter real slow with her ankles out* Jebadiah: Mary finna catch this blessing
  • 16
    MAKES YOU WATCH THE MOVIE SHE WANTS SHE FALLS ASLEEP...
  • 17
    Do you wanna get dirty? I'm not helping you repot your plants
  • 18
    Her: I bet he's thinking about other women Him: If she farts like that again I'm gonna press charges
  • 19
    will u date me? breathe if yes recite the bible in japanese if no
  • 20
    Her: You're just too childish, I'm sorry but I'm leaving... Me: Good luck with that, the floor is lava.
  • 21
    When it was supposed to be but y'all went too hard on endless breadsticks at the Olive Garden night
  • 22
    when ur waiting for him to apologize but he dont know he did something wrong bc u didnt tell him bc he should know
  • 23
    People always say "there's plenty of fish in the sea"... yeah but I've got my eye fixed on that specific, emotionally distant salmon who has commitment issues.
  • 24
    Me waiting for my wife to see the meme I texted her from across the My wife room @LIFEANDTIMESOFMOM @alrightmom made with mematic
  • 25
    Ray of the Dead @SirEviscerate HER: Did you eat my Milk Duds? ME: *silently chews for 7 minutes, finally swallows* first of all, i don't appreciate your accusations
  • 26
    I have a question. Does anyone know when kids start listening? And by kids, I mean my mother- in-law's kids. Specifically, her son. The one that I'm married to.
  • 27
    Shout out to all the married folks out there waiting for their spouses to pass out on the couch so they can watch what they really want to. STONE COLD DADDY
  • 28
    i asked my grandpa, "after 65 years u still call grandma darling, beautiful, and honey. what's the secret?" grandpa: "i forgot her name 5 years ago and i'm scared to ask her."
  • 29
    When she says "fine go ahead and do whatever you want" VIA 9GAG.COM STOP WRONG WAY DO NOT ENTER
  • 30
    When he constantly tags you in memes you've never seen before @MasiPopal [next thing I knew, I was pregnant]
  • 31
    I remember 90s rap lyrics and every mistake my husband's ever made, but I have no clue if I unplugged the hair straightener.
  • 32
    When it's almost bedtime and your husband starts a game with the kids that involves wrestling and screaming. @closetoclassy
  • 33
    ^ or girl * Marry a guy who says things like: - I'm proud of you, - I can't believe you're mine, -You're right. I was wrong, - You can do it, baby, - I don't know where all these plants came from... But, it's really improving the air quality and I think you need more.
  • 34
    "You not even watching the movie" Me: Yes I am
  • 35
    target NOT HOMELESS WIFE IN TARGET 2+ HOURS PLEASE HELP

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