Older brother causes upset after stealing teenage sister's favorite baby name for his newborn daughter: 'My brother has never mentioned liking the name'

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Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
Jun 15, 2024 6:00 PM EDT

They might not always admit to it, but almost any person who has thought that they might have kids some day has thought up a list of prospective baby names. It's only natural to be curious about what you might want to call your future children, and it's fun to think about what names you like the most. 

There are downsides to this, however—such as someone you know taking one of your favorites for their kid before you have the chance to have a baby yourself. This was a predicament that one teenage girl found herself in, after her much older brother and his wife decided to give their newborn daughter a name that she had mentioned multiple times she wanted to use for own child one day. Her brother didn't see the big deal when she got upset over it, so she took to Reddit to ask is she was being unreasonable. The answers were mixed.

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  • 02
    AITA for walking out the room after my brother told me the name of his baby?
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    I am only a teenager but my mother had my brother at 16 making him in his 30's. Ever since i was young I have always talked about naming my future daughter Scarlett, I don't know why but I have always adored the name. Every time the topic of babies, names, and children comes up I always say that my daughter will be called Scarlett, everyone in my family knows this. Last week, my sister law gave birthday to a healthy baby girl, as you can probably guess, they named Scarlett. I was really upset at
    via AcademicPop7165
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    EDIT: when i say walked out I didnt like storm out or anything i just excused myself. A lot of people are saying that its common for cousins to have to same name but not here and in my family. And. Scarlett isnt a common name here Some people are confused, im a girl. And im not sixteen
    via AcademicPop7165
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    Remarkable Table_279 NAH...you're young so everything feels stronger. Stepping away was probably the right thing to do. While your brother should have given you the heads up, the likelihood is that his wife picked the name.
    via Reasonable_Table_279
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    AcademicPop7165 Thank you, I'm not sure who picked it but my SIL has been in my life since i was, she is practically my sister.
    via AcademicPop7165
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    gimmetots123 I don't know if this would help or not, just my experience. I had an idea since I was a teen of certain names I would use. 100% certain. Had my babies jn my 30s, and my taste had completely changed. What they did was shady, and downplaying your feelings and telling you to get over it is rude. They know what they did. That's why people on here always say to keep your future baby names to yourself. Another common suggestion is to get a pet and name it that name. Seems to really piss o
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    Brother-Cane NAH. He's right that you don't own the name. There's no guarantee that you will have a daughter or that she and her cousin will socialize. However, he doesn't own it either, and so if you go ahead and name your daughter Scarlett, and he freaks then he would be the AH.
    via Brother-Cane
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    Glittering-Pop3415 NTA I think people in the comments are a way too harsh. Obviously you don't own the name but your own brother knew you liked that name a lot then proceeded to name his baby that, I will say that it is hurtful but I wouldn't make a big deal out of it I've met so many people who have cousins with the same name but you didn't cause a scene you didn't say anything that could ruin your relationship with anybody so I don't see how your the asshole about a situation anyone would get
    via Glittering-Pop3415
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    Internal-Pineapple84 You're not an a******, but your brother is right. You don't own the name. It sucks that your sister-in-law named the baby Scarlett, but did you ask her about it? Was it a special name to her? Did she know that you had that name picked out or did your brother not share that information? And remember, you may not have any children when you get married. Or you may have kids, and they end up being boys. Or you go ahead and name your daughter Scarlett and that's that.
    via Internal-Pineapple84
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    PixiePapagena NTA!!!! Do NOT let anyone tell you this is no big deal. Saying you don't own the name or focusing on how its a silly matter is disregarding your emotions. This is something they all knew was important to you. You're allowed to be upset. And tbh- i think you reacted very elegantly. I know people who would break down in tears over this. But now let's think of the future- whats done is done, and you'll have a wonderful niece with a name you love. There's no harm in naming your future
    via PixiePapagena
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    Reasonable_Task3765 Agree, all the responses saying brother is NAH shows how many people have a selfish way of thinking. Brother and wife knew what they were doing. Also, even if the OP names her daughter Scarlett one day, this will always be a thing. She'll have to explain to her daughter that she wasn't named after her cousin, actually OP chose this name as a young child and then her brother and wife named their own child this name that was chosen by OP. Situation is embarrassing for brother a
    via Reasonable_Task3765
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    DrTeethPhD ΝΤΑ Your brother is right, you don't own the name. Which doesn't mean that your disappointment is not a valid reaction. It would seem that your brother does not feel an obligation to consider you as a sibling when making important decisions in his life. Fair. But by that same logic, you therefore have no obligation to consider him when asked to provide free babysitting. Fair is fair.
    via DrTeethPhD
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    MonarchistExtreme NTA but I'd be curious as to why your brother settled on that name. Have you ever sensed he was jealous of you before and wanted to spite you?
    via MonarchistExtreme
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    AcademicPop7165 yes, not just me numerous family members
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    lamlrene NTA for being upset. Sounds like you handled it alright (walking out and not causing a scene). You're right you don't own the name but then neither does he. If you want to name your future daughter Scarlett then do it. He can't stop you just like you can't stop him. <---that's a bit tit for tat but I'm kinda petty, lol.
    via IamIrene
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    Tricky-Temporary-777 Nobody owns a name but I'm not about to sit around and see my family/friend talk about a baby name for years and then turn around and name my baby that first. NTA
    via Tricky-Temporary-777
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    jcatgrl NTA, i think it's pretty wild of them to do that when he didn't even like the name.
    via jcatgrl

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aita baby baby names child brother sibling rivalry siblings parenting sister reddit thread newborn Reddit
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