Parents Skip Daughter's Wedding for Son's Football Game, Sparking Accusations of Favoritism and Fiery Debate

Author image for Sienna Varady
Sienna Varady
Jul 3, 2024 9:00 PM EDT

In the family, favoritism is hardly unheard of. In most families, there is always a child who is closer to the parents than the others. Having said that, it is the responsibility of parents to ensure that each child feels valued and cherished.

The story below tells the story of the frustrated daughter. The original poster (OP) married the love of her life in a magical ceremony that was witnessed by the people she holds dear. However, things rapidly became dire when pictures from the big day started to circulate and it became clear that OP's parents were conspicuously absent. For context, it should be noted that the original poster's relationship with her parents was never good. That being said, they didn't really try to get in touch with OP about missing her big day until gossip started to spread about them being poor parents…

Having said that, if you're curious about the exact words that were spoken between OP and her parents, be sure to read the story below! When you're done, don't forget to read the account of the man who demands compensation for the missing items after his future mother-in-law calls him 'careless' and misplaces his valuables!

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  • 01
    Mike knows our mom prefers him, and loves to shove it in my face. Because of this and his behavior, we've always been at odds. He's spoiled, a b t and an awful human. I can't remember how many times I ended up in trouble for things I did better than him or for things he framed me with. His only talent are his football skills. He won a scholarship to a nice college out of state. My parents didn't spend a dime on my education because apparently my fund had been used to cover expenses after a fire,
    via canva
  • 02
    AITA for not telling my parents that the event they were missing was my wedding?
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 03
    Buckle up guys, this will be kinda long. So I (27F) have a younger brother, Mike (21M). He is the definition of a man child and a mama's boy, always complaining, always expecting others to bow to him. Just, overall, an a e. Ever since he was born, my parents fussed over him for everything. He's not special needs, or had a traumatic birth or anything of the sort. He was just... born. And my parents completely discarded me. My mom (50F) especially. She went from a loving mother to one of those boy
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 04
    make fun of on the internet. My father (50M) still showed me love and support, but he's always been too much of a coward to stand up to my mother and let me win at least once. The only one who stood for me was my grandpa (76M), who always called my parents out on their bu it, and never liked my brother. I remind him of his late wife, my grandma, and we have a very special bond, but he lives on the other side of the country and I could never see him often.
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 05
    Mike knows our mom prefers him, and loves to shove it in my face. Because of this and his behavior, we've always been at odds. He's spoiled, a b t and an awful human. I can't remember how many times I ended up in trouble for things I did better than him or for things he framed me with. His only talent are his football skills. He won a scholarship to a nice college out of state. My parents didn't spend a dime on my education because apparently my fund had been used to cover expenses after a fire,
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 06
    It's at public university that I met Lucas. He was the first person I was really drawn to there. Of course I met new people who are now my dearest friends, and thanks to them and Lucas, who was my best friend for years before we got together, I managed to move out of my parents' house. Now both Lucas and I are well known in our fields and have very good salaries.
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 07
    Now, to the main issue. Lucas proposed to me a year ago. We're very private people, so we didn't post it on social media or anything, and when I told my parents they dismissed it with a "that's nice” (I'm starting to think they downright didn't listen to me at all). We decided that we wanted a nice but simple ceremony and reception with our friends and relatives.
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 08
    Lucas convinced me to invite my parents and brother, but they never responded to the invite. And whenever I went to visit and began to talk about my wedding (without mentioning it was a wedding), my mom would always speak over me and about my brother's accomplishments and wild adventures. At one point I got fed up with it, and interrupted my mom to tell her that there was an event I was planning to organize,
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 09
    whose date was unmovable. She told me that they couldn't attend, because my brother was playing the last game of the season that very same day, and wanted them to be there. Of course, this favoritism didn't surprise me: they missed my ballets, shows and both my high school and university graduation for things about him. At this point, i wanted to be petty. I told both my parents that
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 10
    it wasn't a problem to miss this event, purposely omitted the fact that this event was my wedding, and didn't insist further. Flash forward to a few weeks ago, I got married. It was perfect. My family, Lucas' family and our friends were all there, and we had a blast. My grandpa was happy to give me away, and it was just perfect. My relatives asked me multiple times why my parents weren't there with us. I was honest and simply said they had my
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 11
    brother's game to attend, and couldn't come. They gave me a few looks, and my grandpa was visibly angry for a while, but otherwise nothing strange happened. After the reception, Lucas and I left for our honeymoon, and were phone free for the whole duration of the trip. But once we got back, we discovered that a s t storm was welcoming us home. I turned my phone on, and was unable to even unlock it before a storm of notifications popped up. Most of them were from my mother and brother. Mike calle
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 12
    names and insulted me because, apparently, one of my paternal aunts posted the photos of the wedding on Facebook, and captioned it with a very obvious dig at my parents (especially my mom) for missing the wedding. The post apparently went viral in my parents' community, and they've been publicly shamed for their mistreatment of me. It also turns out that my grandpa personally visited my parents to go on a tirade to shame my father, his son, to the point of tears. And this seemed to be my father'
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 13
    was so distraught for missing his only daughter's wedding and for his father's disapproval, that he finally rebelled against my mom and is threatening divorce unless she makes it up to me. I think that's the reason why my mom has been spamming my phone with messages, at first insulting and threatening and then downright pitiful, full of begging and pity parties. Now I'm at home with my husband, deciding how to approach the situation. Most of my relatives, even
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 14
    those I didn't invite to the wedding, reached out to apologize for what I went through and to claim they had no idea this was happening at home (can't blame any of my relatives, they all live with my grandpa on the other side of the country or in another state), but my mom's sisters and friends are belittling me for not telling my mom about the wedding, because now she's inconsolable at the thought of having missed my wedding. Personally I think she just claims that to save face, but I'm not sur
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 15
    The latest messages from my father and mother seem extremely saddened and hurt for missing my wedding. Now my family is divided on three fronts: the majority who is sticking by my side, my maternal aunts shaming me for hurting my mom's feelings, and my maternal grandparents who are adamant that I forgive my mom in light of her "atonement". My best friends are telling me not to listen to them. So, Reddit, AITA?
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 16
    Edit: Thank you so much for the feedback and love! It's overwhelming! I'm going to address the popular questions here: 1. I did inform my parents about my wedding. I sent traditional on paper invites to all my guests, and was notified that all invites had reached their addressees. I did not receive any answer from my parents and Mike, a few very distant relatives, and some people on Lucas' side. I did reach out to all
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 17
    of them through message to double check, and those who hadn't replied told me they couldn't come. I asked my parents and brother via text, but they didn't respond. I was left on read. Knowing them and given all the things I had to plan, I didn't bother insisting. 2. I didn't repeat the date of my wedding because I had already been told there was my brother's game. Plus, every time I insisted on highlighting my celebrations to get an answer, I was always
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 18
    told that it wasn't that important and to not be py and a bother. Because some things were simply more important than me. At this point I think it's fair for me to not insist anymore. It's not worth the effort. 3. I didn't keep my wedding a secret. I avoided telling my parents that it was my wedding to see if they would be interested in the slightest, but surprise surprise, they weren't. Despite this, I did openly talk about my wedding with my aunts and
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 19
    uncles. My mother was in the room with us a few times when I discussed venues or dress shops with my aunt (the FB post one), but some times mom was on the phone, and other times she was just chatting with other people. She never paid attention. When I talked about it during reunions, she smiled and said “that's great, dear”, and then would change the subject. Radio silence on dad and Mike.
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 20
    4. I kept in contact with them because, well, all the times I tried to go NC in the past years I've been ha sed. I tried after my hs, bachelors and masters' graduations, to which they never bothered to show up for reasons involving my brother. Every time I was shamed for daring to turn my back on family by my parents, my brother, my maternal aunts and my maternal grandparents. I think the turning point here is that, all those times, Lucas wasn't by my side (we
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 21
    started dating a little after my last attempt at going NC) and, how that I have him here, I feel more confident in my stance. But before that, I want this confident. As I already stated, all my paternal side lives on the other side of the country and wasn't aware of how they treated me. I did try to expose my parents once, at 14. My aunts, uncles and grandpa reprimanded them, they faked being sorry, and then once home I got the ng and g ghting of my life for “lying”. After b
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 22
    that, I kept in contact regularly with my paternal side, but omitting my parents' a se out of fear, which tbh still haunts me to this day. Only grandpa knew, but he was always threatened to be alienated from me if he tried anything. 5. My parents and I are not from the same city. I live in a city an hour drive from my parents' small town, and they don't know my new address because once, my brother tried to break in my apartment to steal some cash and my mother
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 23
    backed him up, claiming that siblings share their goods. Now i moved, and I'll be sure not to tell them where I live. 6. My parents didn't buy my brother a car and house before he even started high school. They bought him a car for his 16th birthday, and a house near his college when he began freshman year. They didn't spend the money of my fund right away, they just lied to me to use it later for my brother, keeping it stored for later in the meantime.
    via u/sh***y-mom-throwaway
  • 24
    FilReis22.22 hr. ago NTA. I cannot comprehend this!!! Just go NC. Honestly after all these years, what do you expect will happen differently?
    via u/FilReis22
  • 25
    • CityEvening. 22 hr. ago · edited 22 hr. ago NTA. Actions have consequences. Mike is the golden child to the point of things being dysfunctional. You have created your life accordingly based on what they have done (your mum controlling everything and your dad enabling her) and now they're unhappy because they've been shamed for it. Too right! I am however pleased your dad might be waking up.
    via u/CityEvening
  • 26
    Please give a hug or high five to Mister Grandpa from me (depending on what kind of guy he is) for the star that he is. You go and live your best life where people value you! Also congratulations to both you and your husband. You've done absolutely nothing wrong.
    via u/CityEvening
  • 27
    RaddishSlaw. 22 hr. ago NTA The were invited, they gave a reason they weren't attending. You accepted their non participation.
    via u/RaddishSlaw
  • 28
    somethingstrange87. 22 hr. ago NTA. They literally got the same wedding invite that everyone else did. Everyone else figured out that the event was a) important and b) your wedding.
    via u/somethingstrange87

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