Riding Shotgun
I was born into a road tripping family. Old enough to remember the days of printed MapQuest directions and crusty geographical atlases, I can still picture my mom riding shotgun on a long drive, dishing out pre-made snacks, telling my dad which freeways to take, and rifling through our CD collection to play the next album. Before cellphones, the copilot and the driver were a dynamic duo, teaming up to tackle the trials and tribulations of the road, while trusting one another to take care of their respective responsibilities. While the driver focused on driving safely, monitoring the road, and reading gas levels, the copilot would handle everything else.
Everyone in the car had their duties, and that’s what made an eight hour drive go smoothly.
But these days, the mentality of the copilot has changed, largely because the tools of the trade have been condensed into a handy dandy smartphone. However, instead of empowering copilots to further assist their drivers, phones have become the main reason for copilot distraction, offering a world of entertainment far more interesting than boring stretches of road, the driver’s disagreeable music taste, or casual conversations with their in-car comrade.
Yet, a distracted copilot is just as dangerous as a distracted driver because they’re transferring their road trip duties on their partner. This leaves the driver to fend for themselves, navigating GPS directions, music selection, and the operation of a two-ton vehicle hurtling down the road at 85 miles per hour all at the same time.
Nobody wants to take on the burden of driving, but someone must, so when a driver volunteers for the job, others must fall into place to help however they can. According to Jodi R.R. Smith, the president of Mannersmith Etiquette Consulting, the rules of the road apply to passengers just as much as drivers. “As the passenger,” Smith says, “you should be offering to help the driver.” Simply put, the driver is already taking on an enormous task by offering the drive, the least you can do in return is lend a helping hand.
The Journal of Experimental Psychology recently published a study about driver and passenger distractions, attributing diminishing in-car attention to the introduction of cell phone usage behind the wheel. Lead research psychologist, Frank Drews says, “The use of a cell phone while driving significantly reduced driver situation awareness and significantly increased the perceived mental workload relative to no phone.” When the driver is forced to shoulder all of the in-car responsibilities as well as roadside awareness, their cognitive abilities behind the wheel are greatly diminished. However, the same study also showed that passengers can help them out. In-car conversations can help focus the attention of the driver, fine tuning their present mindfulness and mitigating the negative effects of distracted driving.
A good copilot puts the driver at ease in many ways, whereas a selfish passenger makes the ride unenjoyable for everyone else in the car, while also making the journey more dangerous.
Her Majesty the Copilot
A recent Gen Z trend has glorified bad copiloting, praising distracted non-drivers as the “passenger princess.” According to the trend, coined in 2020 on TikTok, the “passenger princess” is a non-driving passenger who claims they deserve white glove treatment from their surrounding servants, taking a leisurely, lavish nap in the front seat, while the driver does all the work. While some think that it’s endearing or cute for the passenger princess to act like in-car royalty, it’s ultimately selfish to assume others will shoulder the burden of the road trip work load.
Via u/fashionngramz
According to Ronald E. Riggio Ph.D. from Psychology Today, social media is contributing to the rise of self-centered culture. “Social media, while it connects us to others, may lead to greater self-centeredness as people strive to make their ‘presence’ known [because] much of social media is ‘all about me.’” Individualism has long since been praised by modern society, as wealth and resource availability has decreased our need for others in the community. However, Riggio says, “Individualism fuels a ‘me first’ attitude that makes it difficult for people to embrace self-sacrifice for the collective good.” Like entitled passenger princesses, who can’t fathom how their eye-masked nap affects the rest of the car, individualists don’t really care how their actions impact others, they just want their personal satisfaction and comfort.
When it comes to a long drive on the treacherous open road, it takes two to arrive safely to your next destination. Driving solo can present a number of challenges and dangers, but passengers can help mitigate those dangers, providing a second set of eyes, hands, and alert mindfulness on the road. As self-serving culture grows, festering in even the closest relationships, it taints the once-sacred bond between a driver and their dutiful copilot. Thus, a long drive intended for socialization, adventure, and collective communion, a road trip with a passenger princess becomes a pseudo-solo journey.
Unlike my road tripping parents, who bore the weight of the long-haul together like seasoned pros, modern driver-passenger relationships more closely resemble that of a grouchy taxi driver and his witless pickups: Distant and detached. Friendships, family ties, and romantic relationships are very different from the cordial impersonal relationship shared with a random cab driver that picks you up after a night out, so why would you treat your closest compatriots in the same respect?
Staying in Their Lane
Passengers don’t have to think about last minute corrections, potholes in the road, or reckless drivers on the freeway, but that doesn’t mean that a passenger has no responsibilities. Behind the dashboard, the car’s internal control center, the driver and copilot must work together to steer their steel vessel down the highway. Not everyone wants to volunteer to be the driver because they dread the stress of driving, but a good copilot, who shoulders the tedium and is always ready to spark up a sleep-banishing conversation, can bring peace to an anxious driver’s mind.
Like a well-oiled engine, a dynamic duo of travelers function more smoothly when each person knows their role, stays in their lane, and stays on top of their respective responsibilities. Because if a driver were to adopt the same nonchalance and self-serving attitude as a passenger princess, we would have a lot more accidents on the road than life-long memories, and for many like-minded travelers on the road, we much prefer the latter.