Selfish parents force two 17-year-old sworn enemies to become stepbrothers, are surprised when there's fallout: 'We witnessed fights, glares, all kinds of things'

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    AITA for telling my sister people did express concerns about her son and stepson before she got married and she didn't listen?
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    My sister has been married for 5 years. She has a 17 year old son and a 17 year old stepson in her home. The boys knew each other since kindergarten and they never got along. I remember my sister telling the rest of the family that she was called in and asked if she'd object to her son and "the other child" being buddied for a few weeks so they could work out their issues. Sister said that was
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    fine. They tried for 7 weeks or something like that. They were seat pals, each other's helper and were given small "jobs" to do together to build a better dynamic and it failed. The whole time they were next to each other it was in the class. This dynamic did not let up. The two of them do not like each other, I personally do believe they truly hate each other.
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    Then my sister and her husband started a relationship. Prior to them moving in together and also prior to the wedding, many of us spoke to my sister about what a bad idea it seemed to be because the boys were not capable of getting along. She told us they'll have to once they're family and it'll do them some
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    good. I asked her if she really believed that and if she really wanted to live in a house where two members do not want to see the other ever. She told me she loved her husband (then fiancé) too much to end things or hold off on marriage. She also told me she was going to convince her son to give her stepson a chance to be a friend if nothing else.
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    That the kids clash in personality and they have some shared interests so they can work it out. She didn't like when our dad took her aside before the wedding and warned her it would end badly because of the boys.
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    My sister and her husband have a son together now. He's also caught in the middle of both of his half brothers hating each other. We all became a witness to just how much these two do not want to be near each other. We witnessed fights, glares, all kinds of things. My sister's stepson lost on our great aunt for his calling them brothers.
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    There was an incident a couple of weeks ago. My nephew lost a friend. He'd been sick for a while and sadly passed away just before his 17th birthday. My sister and her husband wanted all four of them to attend the funeral, with their son together going to our parents. Her stepson didn't want to go, said
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    he didn't want to support my nephew and he didn't care. He thought it was funny as how upset my nephew was. Said he hated the dead kid too. While at the funeral my sister and her husband were sympathizing with the boys parents and expressed that both nephew and step-
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    nephew said kind things about their son. They told my sister and her husband there was no way step-nephew said kind things about their son and he shouldn't have been there.
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    My sister said it was humiliating to realize other people are so aware of the bad blood. She then said we never warned her and I corrected her and said we did and she didn't listen. She told me we didn't try hard enough and how dare I say we did enough.
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    • Dark54g 4 hr. ago NTA. I am surprised one of these boys hasn't gone to live with other relatives.
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    CryptographerAny6604 OP. 4 hr. ago It's not that simple to do. Especially when they are with their only involved parent.
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    buttercupgrump • 4 hr. ago ΝΤΑ She told me we didn't try hard enough and how dare I say we did enough. Here's the thing. Your sister knows she's in the wrong, but she'd rather blame other people for her selfish choices. She cared more about getting married than wellbeing of
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    either boy. What more did. she want you to do? Tie her up until she listened? She'd already made it clear that what she wanted was all that mattered. Shame on her. Let her be embarrassed. It's the least she deserves for ignoring everyone's warnings.
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    • DuckOpen 4 hr. ago Your sister is delusional... the boys have not liked each other since KINDERGARTEN!
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    CryptographerAny6604 OP • 4 hr. ago Yep. And in kindergarten the teacher was unsuccessful in helping them get along.
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    Cruella_deville7584. 2 hr. ago It kind of sounds like the kindergarten teacher might have made the situation worse. Forcing two kids who don't like each other to be buddies for 7 weeks is a good way to turn dislike into hate.
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    Appropriate-Royal-17 · 3 hr. ago Did your sister truly believe that no one outside of the family knew? Also, is your sister always this accountability avoidant?
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    CryptographerAny6604 OP . 3 hr. ago Not usually but with this she has been 100% each step of the way. Also, she knew the boys friends knew. There's bad blood there as a result. But the other parents and people outside that, she figured had no idea.
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    • bunnylla 4 hr. ago INFO: What was the cause of this bad blood between your nephew and step- nephew?
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    Severe_Chicken213 · 4 hr. ago Well since step nephew is mocking and insulting a dead kid, my guess is that he's a bit of an which probably has something to do with it. OR Regular nephew and his friends were such monumental bullies to step nephew, that his personality has become all twisty and jokery.
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    • C_Majuscula 4 hr. ago NTA. Your sister and her husband were extremely selfish and it sounds like she has selective memory because of that. Now they will have a lifelong problem because they have a child. together, so the older boys. will always be connected.

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