The Quintuple-XL Parasol
Super effective against: rain, precipitation of any kind. Weak against: doorways, crowded sidewalks, sense of shame.
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Colleague insists visiting employee leave their car unlocked because there's ‘no crime’ down South, employee refuses: ‘I couldn't take the chance’
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Worker quits on the spot after boss fires him and demands he stay 3 weeks to train his replacement: ‘You can't toss someone overboard and ask them to train someone as they go over the railing’
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Boss insists cutting out middleman to save 15% through direct import, ended up paying double in fees and fines: ‘I let him handle the logistics of a 40-foot container’
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Demanding print advertising client ignores graphic designer's suggestions and forbids them from using any color except for blue: 'The end result was one giant flat blue square'
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HR panics after employee walks into the office wearing auto-recording smart glasses: 'Nobody knows what the policy is because the policy doesn't exist'
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