'They aren't entitled to any more assistance from you': Greedy couple asks in-laws for free washer and dryer despite owing them $1200

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JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Sep 17, 2024 4:00 PM EDT

As someone who has read hundreds, if not thousands of posts where Redditors ask other Redditors if they are the… problem, I can confidently say that you should never lend money to a family member if you can help it. If you feel like being exceptionally generous, just give them a gift and don't expect it back. Because the minute you have unpaid debts in your family, things get ugly. It happens all the time. And there's no good way around this issue without involving family counseling and lawyers. Who has the money for that? So it's best just to keep money and family separate, seeing as there's enough built-in drama anyway. 

That's the situation one couple found themselves in when they lent their family members some dough to get them through a hard time. But when it came time to pay up, they had a different idea in mind. Read on for the story.

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    Cheezburger Image 10404850944
    via Alexander Grey
  • 02
    AITA for not giving washer and dryer away to brother-in- law and sister-in-law
    via u/lucidlyunaware
  • 03
    I have a brother-in-law and sister-in- law that has owed my wife and me $1,200 for over three years now. They were struggling at the time and we let them borrow the money to get a place of their own with the expectation that they would pay us back quickly,
    via u/lucidlyunaware
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    although we really expected that they would give us $50 here and there until it was paid back, which we were fine with. Now, more than three years later, we have not received a dime and they avoid the subject.
    via u/lucidlyunaware
  • 05
    The other day, our four-year old dryer quit working and instead of dealing with the hassle of getting it repaired, we went out and bought a new washer and dryer set. We posted the old ones for free on FB marketplace.
    via u/lucidlyunaware
  • 06
    Almost immediately, my sister-in-law messaged that they wanted it, to which I replied that I would sell it to them for $1,200. She called my wife about the exchange and my wife was somewhat upset. I've temporarily taken the listing down, but I am adamant that they don't get it, especially since there is till a ton of value in them. AITA?
    via u/lucidlyunaware
  • 07
    mdthomas 16h ago • They still owe you money. Why would you give them something for free?
    via u/mdthomas
  • 08
    _parenda_ 16h ago NTA. You don't have an Inlaw problem you have a wife problem.
    via u/_parenda_
  • 09
    Brother-Cane • 16h ago NTA. They still owe you a substantial sum. They aren't entitled to any more "assistance" from you.
    via u/Brother-Cane
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    . Dadbeyondtheglass 16h ago I would start a group chat with everyone included and start sending reminders when they get paid for your money. $50 x 24 months is $1200 I'm sure with both working they can swing $50
    via u/Dadbeyondtheglass
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    creativekinda • 15h ago NTA but you can hide your listings from friends on FB Marketplace. I'd re list it.
    via u/creativekinda
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    • thetaleofzeph 15h ago NTA but if you want your money back you need to buckle down and hound them for $50 a month. No way people like this are ever giving back a dime if they aren't forced to.
    via u/thetaleofzeph
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    ThatKinkyLady .15h ago ESH. Them for not paying you back. You for being willing to give away these appliances for free, yet not to your in-laws. I understand not wanting to on principle, but don't claim it's because they have value when you'd give them to a stranger for free. I also think you're the AH for being so
    via u/ThatK****Lady
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    incredibly passive-aggressive about it. Charging them 1200 for appliances you're giving away is a move. Be an adult and tell them you have already helped them recently with a loan that hasn't been paid back yet, so at this time you extending your good will to someone else. And that you'd really like them to pay you back. Explain yourself like a mature human being. If you already had this convo, my vote would change to N-T-A.
    via u/ThatK****Lady
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    LilHoneyAlice44 • 15h ago NTA. Given that your brother-in- law and sister-in-law owe you $1,200, it's reasonable to ask for that amount for the washer and dryer. You offered it for free on Facebook Marketplace, but when they showed interest, you proposed a fair price reflecting their debt. It's understandable that you'd want to recoup the money they owe you rather than giving away valuable items for free.
    via u/LilHoneyAlice44
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    If they were prompt in repaying their debt, it might be a different situation. However, given the history of them avoiding repayment, your decision to ask for the money is a logical step. It's not unreasonable to expect compensation for valuable items, especially when they have an outstanding debt to you.
    via u/LilHoneyAlice44
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    4Seasons Dogmom · 14h ago . NTA but also not a good communicator. You didn't mention if they are still struggling financially or if you or your wife have tried to clearly communicate your expectations of them for repayment. This is exactly why they say never loan money to family. You are not obligated to loan them money or gift them
    via u/4SeasonsDogmom
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    anything you may be donating. But when you do this without a signed agreement you need to know you may never see the money and if you are not struggling financially you should make peace with it. There are lots of appliances listed for free and if they are really in need they can search elsewhere. If they had not mentioned needing a washer and dryer then it does seem sketchy and rather entitled. Hopefully you and your wife can get on the same page regarding this.
    via u/4SeasonsDogmom
  • 19
    Cerealkiller4321 13h ago • If they can't fix it or it causes trouble somehow it will be your fault. No thanks.
    via u/Cerealkiller4321
  • 20
    18k_gold . 13h ago NTA, but I think I would have worded it, you can have it for free but only after you pay back the $1200 you owe. You have 2 weeks, after that I am giving it to someone else.
    via u/18k_gold

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family drama aita marriage debt ceiling saving money drama money problems dispute marriage-drama take my money sister in law debt borrow family reddit thread Reddit lending money money brother in law
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