Entitled mom of 5 hosts a baby shower for her 6th baby, insists that her childless sister in her 20s should get her an expensive gift: 'If I gave her a gift for the first, I should for all of them'

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Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Oct 3, 2024 1:00 PM EDT

What is the function of wedding presents and baby shower gifts? You might think that your loved ones genuinely want to give you a toaster or a wipe warmer out of the kindness of their hearts, and while that might be partially true, it's mostly done out of obligation. It takes a village to set up a house, and if you make a registry of any kind, you're doing a socially acceptable form of begging your loved ones for help. Honestly, I don't see anything wrong with that. Nobody wants to spend thousands of dollars on strollers, pots, pans, and bassinets, and if someone is willing to help you with that, it's wonderful. 

While that's all well and good, you have to draw the line somewhere. Having a wedding registry on your 6th marriage is like having a baby shower on your 6th kid. At this point, you shouldn't have to ask for anything else. Unfortunately, this mother of 5 with one on the way can't get the hint that she's asking for too much.

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  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10411613440
    via Kateryna Hliznitsova (Unsplash+)

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    AITAH for refusing to buy my sister a baby shower gift for her 6th baby?
    via u/LittlexLilyRose
  • 03
    So, my sister recently sent me a link to her baby registry, and I was kind of surprised (maybe even a little appalled). This is her 6th baby, and she just had a girl last year who just turned 1. So, I'm confused why she needs all these things again, especially since this baby is also a girl.
    via u/LittlexLilyRose
  • 04
    I've never liked buying new baby clothes because they outgrow them so fast, and I don't see the point in spending $40 on a onesie a baby will wear once. In my opinion, babies don't care if something is secondhand, so why not reuse what you already have?
    via u/LittlexLilyRose
  • 05
    To make matters worse, my husband and I are in our 20s and currently childless because we don't feel financially ready for kids yet, although we really want them. Meanwhile, my sister and her husband keep having more kids, and every time we're expected to show up with gifts for each of them—Christmas, birthdays, dance recitals, you name it. And if we don't, they give us grief, not realizing how much pressure it puts on us and other family members.
    via u/LittlexLilyRose
  • 06
    When I told her I wouldn't be buying her a baby shower gift this time, she got upset. I said I'd still go to the shower to celebrate, but I didn't feel the need to buy her a gift since she should already have everything. She argued that each baby should be treated the same, and if I gave her a gift for the first, I should for all of them. She even said I wouldn't understand because I don't have kids yet. Now, neither of us has apologized, and we haven't talked since the argument. So, AITAH for r
    via u/LittlexLilyRose
  • 07
    wanderer866 She argued that each baby should be treated the same, and if I gave her a gift for the first, I should for all of them. Oh look at that... "if I gave "her" a gift for the first," It isn't about the baby. SHE wants presents. Because babies are little dolls and she is sick of all the costumes she already has. NTA. The kid will get birthday presents, just like the other five. Get her a box of condoms for this baby shower or something.
    via u/wanderer866
  • 08
    RebeccaMCullen Honestly, if OP's going to buy her sister a gift, it should be something practical like diapers or formula, not clothing or baby item's that she should have from five other children.
    via u/RebeccaMCullen
  • 09
    notdemurenotmindful Yeah I've heard of "a baby sprinkle." Where hosts have a party and you can bring diapers and or wipes.
    via u/notdemurenotmindful
  • 10
    justme7256 Or if you had a boy, get some girl items in there if you're into the gender specific clothing. But yes, replenish the consumables. With 5 other kids, I don't think clothes are needed. I like the idea of showing up with a box of diapers though. Can't say you didn't bring anything.
    via u/justme7256
  • 11
    LittlexLily Rose OP MD I totally get giving a birthday gift so the baby can enjoy opening something. But needing new toys and clothes for baby #6? I feel like they should take on that responsibility because it was their decision to have so many. 6 Birthdays and Christmas ever year already gives me anxiety.
    via u/LittlexLilyRose
  • 12
    MaddyKet She thinks each baby should basically be treated like the first in terms of baby showers and gifts? Pretty sure you aren't really even supposed to have a full blown baby shower after the first. Is she throwing away the cribs and strollers or is she having a new baby every 12-18 months? She's ridiculous. Get her some diapers and condoms and call it a day. NTA
    via u/MaddyKet
  • 13
    Saltywitha Twist NTA. NO ONE NEEDS SIX BABY SHOWERS!!! The entitlement and audacity is off the charts! She should have more than enough baby things by now for a small army!
    via u/SaltywithaTwist
  • 14
    NextApplication6732 Instead of buying presents individually, you should just get them a family present, i.e., a family pass to the zoo Edit: food vouchers, veggie seeds
    via u/NextApplication6732
  • 15
    Expensive-Diamond-83 NTA. It's not about being unfair to the new baby, it's about practicality. It's totally reasonable to draw the line at some point, especially when it feels like an endless cycle of gift-giving pressure.
    via u/Expensive-Diamond-83
  • 16
    Beautiful_Sweet_8686 This is another one of the things that entitled people (my opinion) have demanded. In my day you had a baby shower for the first kid but not any other ones unless you had another one like 10 years later and never expected another kid. Your sister knew she was going to keep popping out kids so she should have saved everything already and doesn't need anything else except diapers maybe, but thats on the parents to buy if they choose to keep popping out babies. No one owes them
    via u/Beautiful_Sweet_8686
  • 17
    Prudent-Confection-4 I feel like a baby shower isn't to get free stuff it's a celebration welcoming a first time mom. I know I am old fashioned thinking that but it drives me nuts when people have baby showers for back to back a babies. Like what could you possibly need after your 2nd? And not if it's a different gender either. It's not up to your friends and relatives to supply your freaking nursery.
    via u/Prudent-Confection-4
  • 18
    Huge Mistake_3139 NTA - My SIL has 9 kids 14 down to 1 (same father, all single births). Thankfully we do not live close to them because her version of "parenting" is much different than ours. Her kids have been screaming in the next room and she's just sitting at the table, until someone says "are you going to make sure everyone is ok?" (At the time they were the only ones with kids) I remember when my MIL told me that my SIL's church told her they wouldn't be throwing her baby showers for her
    via u/Huge_Mistake_3139
  • 19
    No one in my in-law family has been exactly thrilled for her since after the 5th kid. Kudos to you for buying presents for so long. I told my wife we weren't buying presents for the kids about 6 years ago. We would get them nice thoughtful gifts and their parents would give us each a used VHS tape......while I don't expect gift giving to always be even, the disparity was too much. And that was before we had kids. Again - NTA. I'm not sure why people expect baby multiple baby showers. Maybe two i
    via u/Huge_Mistake_3139

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family drama gifts baby presents mother shower parenting entitled sister baby shower parent mom Parenting Fail parents Parenting FAILS reddit story Reddit
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