Man Refuses to Let Pregnant Sister Move into One Bedroom Apartment, Family Takes Her Side, Pressuring Him: 'Do the right thing'

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Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
Oct 30, 2024 9:00 PM EDT

Welcome, tea-spillers of the internet. Having a roommate is generally not the most ideal living situation for an adult. While it is possible to coexist with another person, most people prefer to leave that stage of life once they hit their 30s, opting to live alone or with their long-term romantic partner. If you must have roommates, then it is always better to just have one. Having more roommates might lower the rent, but it is an invitation for more mess, more noise, and less of a chance to have any sort of alone time that isn't in your room. This is especially true if one of those roommates is a newborn child. 

In our story today, a man refuses to let his sister move into his apartment. While he has no qualms sharing his one-bedroom space with her alone, she is due to birth a plus-one roommate in a matter of months. Our protagonist reserves the right to his own space, but his family is determined to guilt him until he changes his mind. Get all the details of this story down below. 

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  • 01
    r/AITAH u/lcy-Bad7338.9h AITA for Telling My Sister She Can't Move In With Me After Getting Pregnant?
    via Icy-Bad7338
  • 02
    Throwaway account. So, this all started when my younger sister (22F) announced she was pregnant. The father of the baby is her ex, who left her as soon as she told him. She moved back in with our parents for a while but wanted to move out because she felt they were being "too controlling." They told her she needed a job and a plan for raising the baby, which she found stressful and unfair.
    via Icy-Bad7338
  • 03
    She came to me (28M) asking if she could move in because she "needed space" and "a supportive environment." Thing is, I live alone in a one-bedroom apartment, and I work from home. I told her I don't think it would be a good idea since I need peace and quiet for my job, and, honestly, I'm not ready to have a newborn around.
    via Icy-Bad7338
  • 04
    When I told her no, she exploded, saying I was abandoning her and the baby, that I was "privileged" because I have my own place and she doesn't. She called me selfish and accused me of caring more about my "precious job" than my family. Now, our parents are also mad at me, saying it's just "temporary" and that I'm the only sibling with the means to help her. So, AITA for not letting her move in? 3,643 1,152 ୪ D
    via Icy-Bad7338
  • 05
    • ThePterodactylGhost ⚫ 9h Also she wants to mooch off the brother it seems since her parents expecting her to get a job is being "controlling" apparently. 1.8k
    via ThePterodactylGhost
  • 06
    Puzzleheaded Tap4484 7h Yeah they are "controlling" and "privileged" because they expect her to get a job and raise her own kid. OP is definitely NTA. 773
    via PuzzleheadedTap4484
  • 07
    Jewel Trixiex. 9h I agree. It's important for your sister to take responsibility for her choices, especially if she decides to have the baby. Relying on others for support is not a long-term solution. She needs to figure out how to handle this on her own, and that includes having a stable environment and a plan. It's understandable that she's feeling overwhelmed, but expecting you to change your living situation and lifestyle is not fair OP. NTA 257
    via JewelTrixiex
  • 08
    FOXXXyDarlin • 8h Absolutely agree! If she wants to have the baby, she should take responsibility for it instead of relying on others. It's not fair to expect someone else to support her choices. NTA! ← 70 ⇓
    via FOXXXyDarlin
  • 09
    Glittering Lunch_776.9h NTA. Alright. I'll be blunt, everything your sister and parents are saying is bulls . You wanna know why? Tough. It should be obvious. Just stop trying to excuse them and think the best of them. Be brutally honest.
    via Glittering Lunch_776
  • 10
    Here's a freebie: she finds your parents stressful and unfair because she really wants a free ride. She wants people to fall at her feet and bestow gifts, food and drink to her because BABY! That's the stupid moronic wish and demand going on behind her vacant vapid eyes. Your parents? Cmon, you know why they'd get mad at you for saying no. It's obvious!
    via Glittering Lunch_776
  • 11
    Kimmus 2008. 8h Chances are, if he gives in, she'll whine until he lets her and baby take over his bedroom while he's out on the couch. ... 234
    via Kimmus2008
  • 12
    Environmental Slice46 • 9h NTA if this is real your sister is unhinged. Why do people think they are owed things they haven't worked for? She has options. She can go live with her parents but she just doesn't want to put in the work. That is a CHOICE. You don't owe her a living space because she CHOOSES not to be employed. Also you should care about your job. If you didn't have it you couldn't afford the apartment she's trying to mooch off of. Reply 285
    via EnvironmentalSlice46
  • 13
    xMagicWishes • 8h Your sister is definitely making some unreasonable demands. Just because she's in a tough situation doesn't mean she's entitled to your space or that you should sacrifice your peace and job for her choices. She has other options, like staying with your parents, and it's not fair for her to put that pressure on you. You have every right to prioritize your job and living situation OP. NTA ... 34 ⇓
    via xMagicWishes
  • 14
    ΝΤΑ phyrsis • 9h Tell her your lease doesn't allow more than one person (whether it's true or not). ← Reply 91
    via phyrsis
  • 15
    Over-Awareness-4309 9h This and they have to do a credit check to approve her. 46
    via Over-Awareness-4309
  • 16
    TotalSnark 4h • This should be higher up... u/icy-bad7338 please read this. Wait until tomorrow...tell your family you've contacted your landlord or whatever agency & youre unable to have guests...even temporary due to it being a 1 bedroom. You would lose your apartment, which would mean you moving in with your parents as well ;) Then don't talk about it further. If it's brought up just say well not an option for me as you know & change topic ← & 4 5
    via TotalSnark
  • 17
    Icy-Bad7338 OP. 7h Quick update. I just talked to my parents, and honestly, it went worse than expected. They told me that as her sibling, I should "step up" and "do the right thing," even though they know how hard I've worked to get where I am. They keep saying it's "temporary," but there's no clear plan for how long she'd stay or how things would actually work with a baby in my small apartment. It's like they're ignoring my own needs entirely. I want to help, but it feels like I'm being pressu
    via Icy-Bad7338
  • 18
    Coquitlam444 · 7h Hold your ground. This isn't about labeling anyone an a h le. It's not even about emotions. It's about logic, reason, and what's best for the baby. Not for your sister, not for your parents, but for the baby.
    via Coquitlam444
  • 19
    Your home is not suitable for a child. You are not equipped to be a secondary parent. Be as unrelenting as they are. Every time they bring this up, unrelentingly state that you're unequipped to help and suggest that your sister seek help from a social worker, legal aid (for child support), and local housing services.
    via Coquitlam444
  • 20
    Suggest that she immediately find a job that has health benefits. Suggest that she spend her time researching ways to move forward, practical solutions to her problems. You are not a practical and all-encompassing solution to her problems. Your sister should join a single mother's support group where she can learn from other moms who have overcome the issues she is facing. Typically the groups are led by a knowledgeable moderator, such as offered through the YWCA.
    via Coquitlam444
  • 21
    There are so many resources, your sister just has to stop focusing on you, and seek real, practical means of support. If your family cannot accept reality, it would be best for them and for you to have a temporary break in contact. This would not be selfish on your part, rather it would help everyone accept the situation for what it is.
    via Coquitlam444
  • 22
    At some point, if your parents can't help and your sister can't help herself by seeking government housing and other services, then they need to find alternative arrangements. NTA and please don't fold under pressure. Your family is not thinking straight whatsoever, which is understandable yet ultimately unacceptable. For the baby's sake and for yours. UpdateMe. 61
    via Coquitlam444
  • 23
    freakout1015 • 6h Listen dude, you know why your parents are saying this. It's because they want her out of their house. You do not have the room. You live in a one bedroom apartment and you work from home. It's just not feasible. Just because she messed up her life doesn't mean you should mess yours up, too. Let your parents be mad at you. They'll get over it. Your sister is not your responsibility. You can care about someone but not let them step all over you. ... 45
    via freakout1015
  • 24
    Dazzling Potion • 9h You have a 1 bedroom apartment. Your parents are just trying to get out of helping her by pushing her on you. You DO NOT want her moving in with you. You are NTA for not letting her move in. Stand your ground. Reply 23 ↓
    via DazzlingPotion

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