'Her children are not your siblings': 19-year-old son refuses to babysit for dad's 7th wife, she calls him 'a grown man who should know better'

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JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Nov 6, 2024 3:00 PM EST

Babysitting is a profession for a reason. It's not easy work. Sure, millions of mothers do it without being paid, but that's because it's their kid. If you're tasked with watching a child you are not responsible for, that's skilled work. You need to know what to do in an emergency, how to get them to go to bed, how to clean them, and how to keep them entertained. And if you've ever been a kid, you know it's not easy. That's why parents pay good money for babysitters and nannies. They deserve to be compensated for what they bring to the table. 

Of course, in a pinch, you might ask a family member to do it, and you may not expect to pay them. Maybe you could offer to make them a batch of cookies instead. But you understand that they have the right to say no. One woman didn't quite internalize that and wanted to take advantage of her step-son. Read on for the details. 

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  • 01
    foo
    via charlesdeluvio
  • 02
    AITA for telling my dad's new wife I'm not her kids babysitter?
    via u/Ok_Week_4432
  • 03
    My dad has been married 6-7 times before. And now he's married again to either wife #7 or wife #8. It's hard to keep up and some of the marriages happened before I (19m) was born or when I was too young to remember. My dad knows not to try and make a big happy blended family with me and these women he marries anymore. He tried that a couple of times and it failed so badly that he knows I'm his kid, can still be in my life, but not to expect me to treat the new people he cycles through like they'
    via u/Ok_Week_4432
  • 04
    His new wife did not get the memo. She's 10 years younger than him, 35 to his 45, and she has young kids. She called me a couple of times and I didn't answer because I didn't have her number but then we spoke after she called from my dad's phone and she wanted to ask me to babysit her kids one Saturday night when I was supposed to be staying at my uncle's place a few minutes from theirs. I told her no and she questioned me on it but I told her to accept the answer and leave it there.
    via u/Ok_Week_4432
  • 05
    She called me back a few weeks later and she said she heard I'd spent a night with my grandparents and she told me if she had dad had known I could have stayed with them and babysat and they could have gone on a date night. I told her I'm not her kids babysitter and she needs to stop acting like I am. She did seem surprised I was so upfront about that and she told me we're family and I should try to get to know her kids and spend time with them. So I repeated myself that I'm not her kids babysit
    via u/Ok_Week_4432
  • 06
    She keeps trying to call me again but I told dad she'd used his phone twice already and I won't be answering as long as it could be her on the other side. She sent me texts from her phone saying I'm a grown man who should know better. AITA?
    via u/Ok_Week_4432
  • 07
    Fleur... • . 2h ago Edited 56m ago . She called me back a few weeks later and she said she heard I'd spent a night with my grandparents and she told me if she had dad had known I could have stayed with them and babysat and they could have gone on a date night. LMAO, the audacity of her to boldly tell you "I wish I'd known you were close by so I could have used you for free labor."
    via u/Ok_Week_4432
  • 08
    She's not even trying very hard to pretend it's about being family. She blatantly wants to use you. Instead of 'come to dinner so we can get to know each other', it's 'hey I need a favor from a 'grown man' that I barely know, come babysit my (random to you) children'.
    via u/Ok_Week_4432
  • 09
    I wonder how much success she's had in her life, trying to catch flies with vinegar. Take heart: with your dad's track record you probably won't have to endure her for long. NTA.
    via u/Ok_Week_4432
  • 10
    monkey_trumpets 1h ago. • How in the world does someone have 7 exes and be on his 8th wife by 45?????? I'm 41 and I cannot fathom that. Where is he meeting these women? Do they know his past? Bizarre situation all around.
    via u/monkey_trumpets
  • 11
    Ok_Week_4432 OP · 1h ago • I can't speak for every marriage but the ones I can remember knew the deal and some of them were hoping to provide their kids with a new dad/family. Others liked the fact my dad was someone who invested mostly in his work so they could be married in mostly name only and get the stability of marriage with that.
    via u/Ok_Week_4432
  • 12
    mom_in_the_garden • 1h ago I'd bet she doesn't know that she's wife # 7 or 8 in a 20 year timeframe. She probably thinks she's in it for the long run, thus her desire to have her kids bond with you. Tell your dad to call her off or you'll fill her in on your reason for not investing much emotionally in this year's new "family."
    via u/mom_in_the_garden
  • 13
    Gnayeli 1h ago • • So wife #7 or 8 things she has grounds to tell her 19 year old step son what to do??? This is hilarious and wish i knew one of you in real life to see it played out. Sounds like wife #9 is coming soon nta
    via u/Gnayeli
  • 14
    East_Parking8340 • 2h ago I love the irony - 'You're a grown man who should know better! She's a grown woman who doesn't understand the fundamental no means no. And you do know better, with your father's track history it won't be long before family#? disintegrates and he finds more green grass.
    via u/East_Parking8340
  • 15
    Special Respond7372 1h ago • • NTA. Her children are not your siblings, and even if they were, they're not your responsibility. I'd be blunt and tell her that. And when she says you're family you can just bluntly say no, we're not. As an aside, It's astounding how many times your dad has been married at only 45...
    via u/Special_Respond7372
  • 16
    Trevena_Ice • 2h ago • NTA. But you should absolutly tell your dad, that he has to give his wife the memo. That you are not interested in a relationship with her or the children. You are a - grown man why should you seek a relationship with children from your dad's wife? They are not even blood related and not living in the same household. And yeah, it seems like she only wants that to get a free night out. If she wants that, she should pay a baby sitter not expecting you to do that
    via u/Trevena_Ice
  • 17
    fiestafan73 2h ago. • "She told me we're family." No, you're not. She's a stranger who married your dad, one of many such strangers. That doesn't make her anything to you. Tell your dad to get her in line or you're blocking his phone too. Fortunately for you, given his track record, she won't be around for much longer to pester you. NTA.
    via u/fiestafan73
  • 18
    charmer143 · 2h ago. You are not their babysitter, and you made no promises to be one. In fact, you made your boundaries pretty clear. It's up to your dad to explain that to his new wife, and you don't have to feel guilty over refusing to indulge someone who uses the family card just because they want free help. Did she even try to have a relationship with you before demanding that you watch her kids?
    via u/charmer143
  • 19
    • 4th_chakra 2h ago She may be your dad's newest wife, but you don't have to accept her as family. And her leveraging you as a babysitter of convenience ..because family.. is simply opportunistic.
    via u/4th_chakra
  • 20
    You've made your position clear. There are all kinds of people, and local community teens, who would be more than happy to fill in an hour or two while she and your dad go out for *ahem* date night.
    via u/4th_chakra
  • 21
    toryjuniper 2h ago • . You're not wrong for setting boundaries, especially given the context of your dad's numerous marriages and the fact that he understands your stance. It's important to prioritize your own comfort and not feel obligated to take on responsibilities you're not comfortable with
    via u/toryjuniper
  • 22
    OldGmaw2023 • 2h ago. Tell her straight out. You are just Dads latest. I've always told Dad I will not be close to the temporary spouses & their children = | certainly won't be a free babysitter .. Don't call me again. Tell dad if he wants to keep talking > keep his phone away from current wife.
    via u/OldGmaw2023
  • 23
    It don't matter if you 'hurt her feelings' > because She is a Stranger asking for Free Babysitting > she needs the cruel wakeup > since she don't understand polite no's.
    via u/OldGmaw2023

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childcare Babies teens aita infant kids teenagers stepmom moms parenting dad cute kids pregnant reddit thread parent Reddit raising kids Parenting Fail parents stepson children Parenting FAILS
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