Experienced worker gets passed over for promotion after her manager witnesses how she speaks to new hires: 'I was fuming. I hate it when people type like that on social media'

Author image for Brad Dickson
Brad Dickson • Managing Editor
Nov 7, 2024 7:00 PM EST

When people use the term "not leadership material" they can mean a wide variety of things. It can mean that you're not suited to the organization's toxic expectations of complicity and your unwillingness to follow whatever directive is passed down to you blindly. It can also mean that your performance isn't up to standard or that you don't prioritize interpersonal relationships and kiss the appropriate rear ends often and well enough.

However, it can just as likely mean that you lack actual qualities that make a good leader, like the strength of your communication or your competency, efficiency, and ability to get things done. Of course, while sometimes the trait they're looking for or judgment of your competency might not be fair, it generally boils down to "we don't want to promote you," a sort of "It's not you, it's me" of the working world. However you might feel about this, self-reflection is important, and the only way to grow is to take feedback on board.

Advertisement

  • This management-aspiring worker earned herself the label over her treatment of her fellow workers when her manager observed how she was talking to the new staff in a frustrated and demeaning tone, complete with clapping between every word she was saying as if she was living in some sort of meme. Her manager recounted the events in a post they shared to this online community. I found this to be an interesting conversation piece since most accounts you see online generally come from the perspective of the worker who has been passed over, and usually, their narrative is that there was no reason or fault of their own in that eventuating. 

    Read on to see selections of the original thread below.

  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10426171136
    via Globelet Reusable
  • 02
    AITA for not giving a woman a promotion at work because I saw her clap after every word when telling someone how to do something? At my company we've recently had a position come up for for a supervisor in our warehouse. I wanted to promote from within so put a notice up then anyone is welcome to apply and I'll consider everyone. It's an extra £5 an hour so I had a lot of people apply.
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 03
    I've also been recruiting in the warehouse as it's got busy and took on another 10 members of staff. I always try and pay £5 an hour above market average to make sure I get better applicants but it also means I get a of a lot of applicants. Hiring these ten people meant sifting through over 1000 applicants. Eventually I got the ten I wanted and i want to keep them as they are great. One
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 04
    of the new starters is quite a timid woman in her early 20s. On her second day she asked one of the other women who works there named Heather where to put a certain item once it had been unpacked. I was walking past when I heard Heather let out a big sigh and say "I told you this yes ter day you to f ing learn I was fuming. I hate it when people type like that on social media but to hear one of my more senior employees talk to a young new starter like that on her second day really p ed me off.
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 05
    I told Heather I wanted to see her in my office straight away. I was honest with her and said that out of all the applicants for the supervisor role she was in my top three I was considering but I will now not be considering her at all. She asked why and I told her. I said after what I just saw i believe she will be the type who would let and sort of power and authority
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 06
    get to her head and treat people cruelly. I said she was just asked a simple question by a new starter and she proceeded to embarrass her and belittle her in front of other coworkers and that is not the sort of person I want supervising a team of 20.
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 07
    She was so angry and has since lodged a complaint saying it's unfair she's no longer being considered for the job and she feels she's being victimised for the way she communicates. I don't think im an a h le for not giving her the job but am I the a hole for telling her why she's not getting it now rather than just dealing with the applications and telling her afterwards she's not been successful? I suppose it can be seen as a bit petty of me.
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 08
    TLDR: saw a worker of mine being cruel to a new starter for no reason and told her that's why she isn't getting promoted. Aita?
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 09
    Cybermagetx Nta. She would cause people to leave. Shes not leadership material. At all.
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 10
    whiteOzzzy NTA temperaments like that - are cancer to an organization, especially at senior levels. Management is a physical embodiment of the company culture that will be perpetuated. If you wouldn't like her to be your manager and that's not the culture you're trying to build, the choice is self- evident.
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 11
    naeviie_ NTA - It wasn't petty, it was direct. Her inability to communicate in a professional and respectful manner is the exact reason she's being passed up, and if she has any brains at all she'll take that to heart. Imagine complaining that you're not getting a promotion because you're incapable of not being an ahle to your coworkers Imfao, hopefully she'll get laughed out of any HR meeting
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 12
    Proper_Fun_977 NTA Unfortunately, you gave good clear feedback and now the employee is making a complaint. It might be worth mentioning during this complaint that what she did could be considered b lying.
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 13
    Prideof Capetown NTA There is a yuuuuuuuge difference between "communicating" and "creating a toxic work environment" Sounds like ol' Heather hasn't figured that out yet
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 14
    Exotic_Ideal_8255 NTA - HR would tell you that you should never tell a candidate why they aren't getting a job, but if you don't they'll never have the opportunity to improve. You did the right thing. That's not a "communication style" that's behavior.
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 15
    DankyMcJangles Note to self, next time have a write up and someone from HR present when having that type of conversation. On top of your valid concerns, she further validated your perspective by not accepting. valid criticism and instead going on the attack toward you. That's someone who doesn't deserve their job, let alone a promotion. NTA, whatsoever
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 16
    Queasy-Trash82... NTA. You're great. Thank you for protecting your employees like that. You didn't do anything wrong except for the timing of your delivery. You could have waited to make the supervisor announcement and talked up the qualities you promoted the person for (positive
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 17
    coaching, employee development, kindness, empathy, etc). Then when Heather asked why she wasn't chosen, you could again highlight those qualities, ask her how she thinks she does on those, gather feedback from other employees, then calmly explain why what you overheard did not
    via Ukcheatingwife
  • 18
    demonstrate empathy, and that you'd be happy to work with her on communication style so she can be considered for the next time a role opens up. Did you also apologize and talk to the employee who was scolded to explain your lack of tolerance for that behavior?
    via Ukcheatingwife

Want More? Follow Us and Add Us as a Preferred Source on Google.

Tags

management workplace discussion employment issues aita antiwork workplace-stories jobs employee employment-discussion manager job work employees managers overworked-employees workplace Horrible Bosses employment in the workplace
Scroll Down For The Next Article