Woman Spends 25 Hours Knitting an Intricate Handmade Scarf as a Christmas Present for Her Sister-in-Law After They Have a Falling Out, Building a Bridge With 1000 Yards of Yarn

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Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor
Dec 28, 2024 5:00 PM EST

Knitting is hard. I think I can speak for all of us when I say that if you've ever spent any length of time attempting to teach yourself a stitch or two, you've earned a new respect for those old ladies down at the YMCA with crooked fingers and a knitting project on their lap. 

Yarn crafts of all sorts not only require loads of time, but they also require skill, thoughtfulness, and a surprising amount of cash (nicely spooled yarn ain't cheap!). So if you're ever privy to a handmade gift from a knitter or crochet fiend in your friend group, just know that they probably spent 100s of hours perfecting this skill to create relatively simple-looking knitwear. But guess what, tons of love went into that thing! 

So when this woman decided to knit her sister-in-law a scarf for Christmas, it was no small gesture. However, to mend a bridge after a falling out, she was willing to be the bigger person to make an offering that may well save their relationship. Keep scrolling for the details of this family feud that just might be solved with a tasteful, white chevron pattern.

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  • 01
    I thought we'd resolved things but apparently, she spent the last 2 months intentionally avoiding me and may not show up for Christmas. So glad I spent all this time on this scarf... But I'm determined to be the bigger person and
    via Elena Photo
  • 02
    The Christmas gift I spent 25 hours knitting for my sister- in-law who won't speak to me Finished Object To clarify, I didn't know she wasn't speaking to me until after I finished this! We've never been very close but we had a falling out a couple of months ago. I
    via toggywonkle
  • 03
    thought we'd resolved things but apparently she spent the last 2 months intentionally avoiding me and may not show up for Christmas. So glad I spent all this time on this scarf laughing frying emoji But I'm determined to be the bigger person and will still be gifting it to her.
    via toggywonkle
  • 04
    Cheezburger Image 10445270016
    via toggywonkle
  • 05
    EDIT: I made this post so I could talk about a scarf. There are posts almost daily this time of year talking about frustration in regards to knitting gifts. I didn't ask for advice! Yet here I am getting a ton of unsolicited advice and
    via toggywonkle
  • 06
    having to defend my sister in law who I don't like and myself for saying that I wanted to do what I thought was the right thing! How dare I give my sister in law a gift in spite of our differences?! I'm a monster!!
    via toggywonkle
  • 07
    Anyway, my point is that I'm over it and I'm done defending her. She's unkind and has been for 8 years. She's never once gone out of her way to talk to me. I don't think her and I have ever had a one- on-one conversation (not
    via toggywonkle
  • 08
    for lack of trying on my part). My entire family has been under the impression that she secretly hates us for years yet has continued to keep the doors open in case she comes around. She told me to "get help" when I expressed anxiety to
    via toggywonkle
  • 09
    my brother and husband in a foreign country. She won't let me spend time with my brother without her around. Just because she went no contact with me does not mean that she is somehow the victim. This
    via toggywonkle
  • 10
    is a manipulation tactic from a self centered person. I've been cutting her slack for years and I'm done with it. Knitting the scarf has been a very eye- opening experience for me and now I know that if she
    via toggywonkle
  • 11
    ever does decide to talk to me again.... She's going to be in for a surprise because I don't want to speak to her anymore. She hurt me to the extent that I'm willing to risk my relationship with my own brother to avoid her.
    via toggywonkle
  • 12
    However. She's getting the scarf. If she loves it that's great! If she hates it I don't care. She can send it to Goodwill or regift it and take credit for all I care. If she's offended by the gift? That sounds like her problem.
    via toggywonkle
  • 13
    Halfserious 101 Speaking as someone who's been halfway through this scarf for what seems like eons and who definitely knows what it takes to make it, please for the love of fluffy goats don't give it to her. It's beautiful, please keep it for yourself!!
    via Halfserious
  • 14
    toggywonkle OP I've had it on my to knit list for ages and have been knitting it (what felt like) nonstop for a week. If it hadn't been a time sensitive project it probably would've taken me months lol
    via toggywonkle
  • 15
    _jasmonic_acid That's lovely and definitely keep it for yourself... or at least don't give it to her until she redeems herself. Also being the bigger person is overrated.
    via _jasmonic_acid
  • 16
    toggywonkle OP I already told my brother I made something for her to try and coerce him to coerce her to come for Christmas and was politely but firmly shut down. Not sure I can avoid gifting it at this point
    via toggywonkle
  • 17
    Lenauryn I don't care what the other side is! Even if you were in the wrong, don't give a beautiful handmade gift to someone who isn't interested in having a relationship with you. She won't be able to enjoy it anyway, and it'll get shoved in a drawer or donated. Give her an apology and keep the scarf.
    via Lenauryn
  • 18
    toggywonkle OP Hopefully people see this because I can't edit my post! I DO NOT want to sh talk my SIL! She's clearly going through something and that's fine. I'm frustrated but such is life. I mostly wanted to share
    via toggywonkle
  • 19
    my project and my frustration around completing this for someone I found out is upset with me 50+ inches in. That said THANK YOU to everyone saying kind things! Some of this is unnecessary drama but mostly I'm getting very supportive comments and advice! This is the greatest community
    via toggywonkle

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