Woman demands freeloading sister move out after she refuses to contribute anything to their house, sister accuses her of being controlling and selfish

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Jan 12, 2025 7:00 PM EST

You know how people say you should never mix family with business? 

Maybe there should also be a saying that you should never live with your family outside of your parents' home. As much as you had fun living together as kids, or even if think you are really good friends and get along great, living together alone as adults is a whole other challenge. It is hard enough doing it with regular roommates, but doing it with a sibling? Genuinely sounds like a nightmare.

If there are any siblings here who think about giving it a try despite the warning sign, at least read this next story and collect some lessons and perhaps even some rules you should apply right off the bat. 

For example, figure out a fair way to handle the money before you move in together. You can decide one roommate pays for the rent and the other for utilities, you can keep tabs on every expense and then pay each other through an app, you can decide to buy absolutely everything together and then split the bill on the spot. Whatever works for you is fine, but both of you have to make sure you establish it clearly.

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  • The sisters in this story obviously were not ready for the move together, and they definitely didn't talk about the responsibilities they would have to share. So it's not surprising that all the work eventually fell on one of the sisters, while the other did nothing to help.

    This led the hardworking sister to confront her freeloading sibling and tell her that something has to change if she intend to keep living together. Unfortunately, the freeloading sister did not enjoy the reprimand…

  • "If she doesn't start paying, she is cut off completely"
    via Anna Shvets

  • "AITAH for giving my sister an ultimatum after she refused to pull her weight and drained my savings?"

    So, me (25F) and my sister (29F) decided to move in together about a year ago. I thought it would be a great idea because we always got along growing up, and honestly, I was looking
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • forward to spending more time with her as adults. We agreed upfront that we'd split everything groceries, toiletries, utilities down the middle. Sounds fair, right?
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • Well, things didn't exactly turn out that way. At first, I didn't notice anything major, but over time, it became clear that she wasn't holding up her end of the deal. She eats everything. Like, everything.
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • I'd buy groceries, stock the fridge with stuff for both of us, and within days, it'd all be gone. Soda? She drinks the whole pack. Snacks? She finishes them in one sitting.
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • Toiletries? She uses mine and never buys more. At first, I tried not to let it get to me because I figured maybe she was just going through a rough patch or something.
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • But then it just... never stopped. I kept running out to buy more stuff groceries, shampoo, even toilet paper because she'd use it all and wouldn't replace anything. I brought it up casually a few
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • times, but she always brushed me off, saying stuff like, "Oh, I'll get it next time," or "You're so good at shopping, I'll just pay you back later." Spoiler: she never did.
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • Plan
    via pixelshot
  • Fast forward to now, and my savings are basically gone. I've been covering almost everything for the house because I can't stand living without basic stuff like food or soap. When I finally sat
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • her down and told her this wasn't working, she just rolled her eyes and said, "You're better at managing money than me, anyway." Like, what does that even mean? I told her I couldn't
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • keep doing this and gave her an ultimatum: either start contributing, or we stop sharing everything. Groceries, toiletries, even cleaning supplies we'd each buy our own and keep things strictly separate.
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • She completely flipped out. She said I was being "selfish" and "controlling" and accused me of putting money over family. She even said I was making her feel unwelcome in her own
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • home which, by the way, is a place I'm mostly paying for. Now she's barely talking to me, and things are super tense around the house. I feel bad because I don't want to ruin our
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • relationship, but I also can't keep letting her walk all over me. So, AITAH for giving her the ultimatum and setting boundaries?
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • No_Guest_5349 NTA, you agreed on splitting the cost which she is not doing she is the AH! You did the right thing by giving her an ultimatum to pay here share she is completely disrespectful towards you with here attitude
    via No_Guest_5349
  • Sad Boysenberry45... OP I just can't keep up with buying groceries and toiletries for 2 1 just don't have the money for that that's why we agreed from the beginning to pay everything equally to save some money but she doesn't keeps up with our agreement
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • Candid Process 1831 NTA! If she doesn't cover here part of the expenses cut her of and let here get her own sh she is the AH for taking advantage of you!
    via Candid_Process_1831
  • Sad Boysenberry45... OP I will have to cut here of if she doesn't step up to our agreement I just can't afford it
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • Old Cheek1076 Sounds like the two of you aren't compatible as roommates. You should start to consider what your other options are. NTA.
    via Old_Cheek1076
  • Sad_Boysenberry45... OP Yeah looks like it!
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • Opposite_Ad_5337 NTA. She isn't holding up her end of the bargain. Just make sure you lock up the stuff you buy so she can't get to it.
    via Opposite_Ad_5337
  • Sad Boysenberry4524 OP If my sister doesn't start buying groceries and other stuff she uses she definitely won't touch my stuff again
    via Sad_Boysenberry4524
  • hiimlauralee She thinks you're putting money over family? She sees you as an ATM. That's not family. She's a sponge and has to go. NTA
    via hiimlauralee

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family drama aita house sisters siblings bad roommates reddit story family sibling sister Reddit roommates money women entitled people apartment
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