Daughter demands inheritance after mom leaves everything to neighbor instead: 'I never expected me to be the only person who Valorie left in her will'

Author image for Isabella Penn
Isabella Penn
Feb 26, 2025 5:00 PM EST

We could all use a little bit of an inheritance in our lives. And with the economy today, we could really use a little... like, right now. You could end up as one of the lucky ones who inherits a fortune, or you could get stuck with a distant relative's antique spoon collection. But what's even worse is when the inheritance comes with family drama.

That's what happened to this woman who unexpectedly inherited everything from her late neighbor, who also happened to be a close friend. At first, she assumed her friend didn't have any close relatives. But as it turns out, she did. She had a daughter who hadn't spoken to her in decades. Now the daughter is back and claiming she deserves a share of the inheritance (ever mind the fact that she ignored her mom's attempt to reconnect before she passed). Legally, the inheritance belongs to the neighbor, but morally, that's a whole different question.

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  • "WIBTA if I don't share the inheritance that I received from a friend with her daughter?"

    I (F32) recently came into an inheritance when my neighbor and close friend, Valorie (F68), di d. I met Valorie when I moved into my condo in 2018 and she became my next door neighbor. Our places are on the top floor and have almost connecting balconies.
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    via Samantha Gades for Unsplash+
  • We used to spend every Saturday morning outside taking care of our plant babies and chatting. I had learned that Valorie had been a widow since she was 55. I got the impression that she had married young and never had a true chance to learn who she was until after he had di d.
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  • I had always thought that Valorie was alone in the world. Turns out that Valorie had had one child, a daughter, Sam (F44). However, they had been estranged since the early 2000's. The story that Valorie told me was that Sam had come out as gay when she
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  • was just out of high school. That did not sit well with Garry. He told Sam that she was no longer his daughter and kicked her out; telling her to never contact them or come home again. The whole situation broke Valorie's heart and it was her biggest regret in life. She told me that she had
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  • always wished she had tried to fight for Sam, but in the moment she was so shocked that she watched the whole thing happen without saying a word. When I had first heard the story aboutValorie told me that she hadn't because she didn't know
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  • how to even try. So I did some internet sleuthing and found Sam on Facebook. It turns out that Sam had managed to build a good life for herself. I helped Valorie draft a heartfelt message to Sam. Valorie apologized for everything and
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  • told Sam how much her perspectives had changed over the years. Valorie also asked if they could try and build a new relationship. We sent the message and saw that Sam had seen and maybe read the message, but Sam never responded.
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  • About a month ago, I got home from work to find Valorie passed away on her balcony. She had suffered an embolism. I sent the link to her obituary and memorial page to Sam. I didn't see Sam at the funeral. There was a lawyer handling all of Valorie's
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  • affairs. I thought that I would simple grieve the loss of my friend and eventually would have a new neighbor. I never expected me to be the only person who Valorie left in her will. Let alone to have been left everything.
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    via Debby Hudson for Unsplash+
  • A few days ago Sam messaged me. She was upset and demanded that I give her Valorie's things. Claiming that I took advantage of an old widow. I was upset when I first read Sam's message and thought, "who does she think she is? She
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  • hasn't spoken to Valorie in literal decades and never responded when Valorie tried to reach out. Now Valorie is her mother and that entitles her to Valorie's stuff?" Now I wonder if I should do something for Sam. I go back
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  • and forth if Valorie would want me to. Valorie knew where Sam was, so she could have included Sam somehow. The lawyer I talked to said that the inheritance is completely mine and that Sam has no claim, but should I give Sam something?
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  • Now that you know the full story, did your opinion change of who’s in the wrong? For the people in the comment section, the reactions were mixed. Some thought the daughter had no right to the inheritance after ignoring her mother for decades, while others felt the mom was the one who messed up all those years ago.

  • Jvzies This is a soft NTA from me. To be clear, Valorie was a bad parent. Even by her own accounting, what she did to Sam was terrible and wrong. She allowed her husband to cut their child off for being gay - or at least didn't fight it - and remained estranged from Sam for decades afterward. While her husband may be the main villain, Valorie is very far from blameless.
    via Jvzies
  • Also, who knows what Sam's side of the story looks like? The truth could be even less favorable than how Valorie told it. Reaching out to Sam with an apology was a nice thing to try, but let's be real, Sam had every reason to rebuff her. A good person who felt truly sorry for what they did to Sam would probably have left a portion (or all) of the estate to her, even if they didn't have much of a relationship.
    via Jvzies
  • You are legally and ethically entitled to this inheritance, since you had a relationship with Valorie and it was her express wish that you be given her things upon her passing. I can't call you an a hole for that. If it were me, though? I would probably be trying to use some of Valorie's legacy to make things right with Sam.
    via Jvzies
  • This doesn't have to mean giving her everything, but it would certainly extend to giving her any family personal effects that she wants. For things like money or property without sentimental value, I think it's fair to factor in things like how much Sam (or you) need it. Is there a grandchild who might have college expenses? All that sort of thing.
    via Jvzies
  • RelationBig4907 NTA and 68 is not t that old. She was fully aware of what she was doing. That's why ppl have wills!
    via RelationBig4907
  • GForcePi NTA Valorie included only you in her will, not anyone else. So basically now it's up to you what you want to do with it.
    via GForcePi
  • The obvious choice should be you call Sam and ask if she wants any personal things that belong to her mother. As per money, I don't think so you should give it to her because Valorie didn't include her in will even if she could. Take legal advice if you need.
    via GForcePi

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friendship inheritance neighbors drama best friends friends will relationships parenting family daughter parents apartment
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