‘So I put a lock on our bedroom door’: Mother agrees to babysit daughter's cats while she's on vacation with boyfriend, her only condition is to sleep in their bed, boyfriend refuses

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Feb 27, 2025 7:00 PM EST

Even though many people say that getting a cat is pretty easy because they are quite independent and low-maintenance, a pet is still a big responsibility.

As a person with two cats myself, I know how big of a responsibility they actually are. Not only because they require as much love and attention as dogs (possibly even more), but also because getting a cat means you are now fully committed to returning home every day to them.

If you want a vacation somewhere that is not your home, you must plan it so that your cats will not be left alone. Someone has to be there to give them food and water, clean their litter box, and pet them as much as they want. Unlike a dog, most people can't take their cats with them, so you have to find a babysitter to take care of them for the entire time you're gone.

So, when you find someone willing to take on the catsitting for you, you should truly be grateful. Unlike the guy in the story below…

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  • The couple in this story, like many responsible cat parents, needed to find a catsitter who would take care of their cats while they were away on vacation. They decided to ask the girlfriend's parents, who agreed to the job on the condition that while they were babysitting, the mom would get to sleep in the couple's bedroom.

    If you ask me, that doesn't sound like too much to ask, especially since the mom is doing the couple a huge favor. However, the boyfriend was not a fan of the idea at all…

  • 01
    "It's making me very uncomfortable"
    via yipengge
  • 02

    "WIBTA if I put a lock on my bedroom door so my GFs mother can’t sleep in our bed"

    My girlfriend (F27) and I (M30) are going on holiday in a few months and her mother (F60s) and stepfather (M70s) have agreed to come and babysit our 2 cats (M1.5&F1.5). Her
    via Guilty-Loquat-2153
  • 03
    mother has said that they will need to use both the spare room bed and our own bed when they stay as they can't share a queen sized spare bed for 1 week as they'll "not be
    via Guilty-Loquat-2153
  • 04
    able to sleep in the same bed together all week" blaming the bed size. My GF has unhappily agreed to keep the peace but it's making me very uncomfortable they'll be using
    via Guilty-Loquat-2153
  • 05
    our bed. WIBTA if I put a lock on our bedroom door just before we go away so they can't use it? Extra info that may/may not be relevant: My girlfriend's
    via Guilty-Loquat-2153
  • 06
    mother lives about 3 hours away visits every few months, but the step dad has never been before. Before we had the spare bed she would happily sleep on the quite comfortable sofa and we
    via Guilty-Loquat-2153
  • 07
    mainly got the spare bed for her visits. Although I know they are doing us a big favour by looking after the cats they were intending to use it as a mini holiday. The mother does
    via Guilty-Loquat-2153
  • 08
    not always sleep in the same bed as her stepfather as they both wake each other up snoring and he is now getting some medical issues meaning he has frequent toilet trips in the middle of the night.
    via Guilty-Loquat-2153
  • 09
    thefanciestcat YWBTA If this arrangement makes you uncomfortable, find a different arrangement like a paid pet sitter.
    via thefanciestcat
  • 10
    It's okay to have boundaries but you're in choosey beggar territory because you want to set the rules without giving anything up. Installing a lock instead of setting a boundary is too much. If you
    via thefanciestcat
  • 11
    don't trust them to stay out of your bed because you asked or you can't work up the nerve to ask and set that boundary, you shouldn't be accepting this help.
    via thefanciestcat
  • 12
    FWIW, I follow my own advice on this. We always paid a cat sitter or boarded our cat because the family options, while available and generously offered, weren't something I wanted to deal with.
    via thefanciestcat
  • 13
    Cheezburger Image 10473769472
    via pixelshot

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 14
    juliabelleswain YTA. I get enjoying your privacy. However, your MIL is doing you a big favor. Wash the sheets before and after. H_I, wash the pillows too, and put on a mattress protector. Otherwise, hire a pet sitter.
    via juliabelleswain
  • 15
    BigBigBig Tree YTA if you give them no warning and just leave the door locked. There may well be more conversation to be had re: sleeping arrangements, but if you let
    via BigBigBigTree
  • 16
    them believe there will be two beds for them and then let them find out that's not the case when they get to your place, that'd be a major AH move
    via BigBigBigTree
  • 17
    No-Pea-7530 YTA. hate to break it to you, but you and your wife won't be the only people to ever sleep in that hotel bed.
    via No-Pea-7530
  • 18
    JeepersCreepers74 YTA. They're doing you a huge favor and you haven't given any good reason why you're so creeped out by her
    via JeepersCreepers74
  • 19
    mom sleeping in your bed when you're not even at home. If you want to make rules like this, hire a pet sitter.
    via JeepersCreepers74
  • 20
    Tanyec YTA. This is not how you go about this. If you don't want her sleeping in your bed, you put on your big boy/girl pants and tell her, before she commits to coming over for a week.
    via Tanyec
  • 21
    This may result in her not coming, and you needing to find alternate pet sitting arrangements. But you can't tell someone ok only to make it impossible (by adding a lock) once they get there.
    via Tanyec
  • 22
    thetinymole YTA. Her condition for watching your cats is that she has access to both bedrooms. Your GF agreed. If you lock the door, she would be well within her rights to leave. Either accept her terms or hire a catsitter.
    via thetinymole
  • 23
    keesouth YTA. She's doing you a favor and there's absolutely nothing wrong with her sleeping in your bed. Just wash the sheets
    via keesouth
  • 24
    Green-Pop-358 Don't ask anyone to come sleep at your house. Your cats, your responsibility. Pay someone. I'm sure she wouldn't want to come help you if she knew how big of a burden she is. YTA.
    via Green-Pop-358

Tags

boyfriend family drama aita baby babysitter mother reddit story parenting girlfriend babysitting mother in law family Reddit Cats women parents Father vacation
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