‘So I put a lock on our bedroom door’: Mother agrees to babysit daughter's cats while she's on vacation with boyfriend, her only condition is to sleep in their bed, boyfriend refuses

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    "It's making me very uncomfortable"
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    "WIBTA if I put a lock on my bedroom door so my GFs mother can’t sleep in our bed"

    My girlfriend (F27) and I (M30) are going on holiday in a few months and her mother (F60s) and stepfather (M70s) have agreed to come and babysit our 2 cats (M1.5&F1.5). Her
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    mother has said that they will need to use both the spare room bed and our own bed when they stay as they can't share a queen sized spare bed for 1 week as they'll "not be
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    able to sleep in the same bed together all week" blaming the bed size. My GF has unhappily agreed to keep the peace but it's making me very uncomfortable they'll be using
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    our bed. WIBTA if I put a lock on our bedroom door just before we go away so they can't use it? Extra info that may/may not be relevant: My girlfriend's
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    mother lives about 3 hours away visits every few months, but the step dad has never been before. Before we had the spare bed she would happily sleep on the quite comfortable sofa and we
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    mainly got the spare bed for her visits. Although I know they are doing us a big favour by looking after the cats they were intending to use it as a mini holiday. The mother does
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    not always sleep in the same bed as her stepfather as they both wake each other up snoring and he is now getting some medical issues meaning he has frequent toilet trips in the middle of the night.
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    thefanciestcat YWBTA If this arrangement makes you uncomfortable, find a different arrangement like a paid pet sitter.
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    It's okay to have boundaries but you're in choosey beggar territory because you want to set the rules without giving anything up. Installing a lock instead of setting a boundary is too much. If you
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    don't trust them to stay out of your bed because you asked or you can't work up the nerve to ask and set that boundary, you shouldn't be accepting this help.
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    FWIW, I follow my own advice on this. We always paid a cat sitter or boarded our cat because the family options, while available and generously offered, weren't something I wanted to deal with.
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    Cheezburger Image 10473769472
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    juliabelleswain YTA. I get enjoying your privacy. However, your MIL is doing you a big favor. Wash the sheets before and after. H_I, wash the pillows too, and put on a mattress protector. Otherwise, hire a pet sitter.
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    BigBigBig Tree YTA if you give them no warning and just leave the door locked. There may well be more conversation to be had re: sleeping arrangements, but if you let
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    them believe there will be two beds for them and then let them find out that's not the case when they get to your place, that'd be a major AH move
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    No-Pea-7530 YTA. hate to break it to you, but you and your wife won't be the only people to ever sleep in that hotel bed.
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    JeepersCreepers74 YTA. They're doing you a huge favor and you haven't given any good reason why you're so creeped out by her
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    mom sleeping in your bed when you're not even at home. If you want to make rules like this, hire a pet sitter.
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    Tanyec YTA. This is not how you go about this. If you don't want her sleeping in your bed, you put on your big boy/girl pants and tell her, before she commits to coming over for a week.
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    This may result in her not coming, and you needing to find alternate pet sitting arrangements. But you can't tell someone ok only to make it impossible (by adding a lock) once they get there.
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    thetinymole YTA. Her condition for watching your cats is that she has access to both bedrooms. Your GF agreed. If you lock the door, she would be well within her rights to leave. Either accept her terms or hire a catsitter.
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    keesouth YTA. She's doing you a favor and there's absolutely nothing wrong with her sleeping in your bed. Just wash the sheets
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    Green-Pop-358 Don't ask anyone to come sleep at your house. Your cats, your responsibility. Pay someone. I'm sure she wouldn't want to come help you if she knew how big of a burden she is. YTA.

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