‘My brothers are all pigs, they never did anything and as adults cannot even turn a washer on’: Entitled brother trashes sister’s home into a disgusting mess, leading her to make him deal with the filth as a wake-up call.

Author image for Etai Eshet
Etai Eshet • Editor
Mar 19, 2025 2:00 PM EDT

Imagine the chaos of sharing a home with someone who treats basic hygiene like an optional suggestion and responsibility like it's a foreign language. Now imagine that person is your own brother, who's freshly evicted by his girlfriend and brings a tornado of sunflower seeds, gum wads, and literal maggots into your once-pristine home. 

But messy behavior like this isn't born overnight; it's rooted in family dynamics that place responsibility squarely on the shoulders of one gender while letting the other coast. Growing up in a traditional household where the girls cleaned while the boys lounged creates adults who believe chores simply aren't their problem. 

The result is grown men who think "I wasn't taught" is a valid excuse in the age of Google and YouTube. While their sisters learned to fix tires and patch walls, they mastered the fine art of leaving fridge doors open and calling it effort.

With this dazzling cocktail of virtues—weaponized incompetence, outdated gender roles, and a complete inability to find the trash can—it's shocking that women everywhere haven't rushed to claim him.

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  • Who wouldn’t want a partner who treats basic hygiene like it’s rocket science and considers leaving maggots in shared spaces a bold personal choice? It’s almost poetic how he’s been gently passed along like a hot potato, from girlfriend to sister, all while perfecting the fine art of being simultaneously clueless and entitled.  

  • "AITAH for "terrorizing" my brother making him live in his own filth?"

    "I lost it and told him to change his behavior totally or get out"
    via txking

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • My brothers are all pigs. We had a very traditional house where girls cleaned and washed dishes from the time, we were old enough to walk and stand on chairs and my brothers never did anything and as adults cannot even turn a washer on. I very much resenting how I felt
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • like I had to raise my own father and how holidays and weekends were always spent with my brothers and dads laying around and us cleaning. Even Christmas they got to play with their toys and we went in the kitchen. I do not care about excuses like "I was
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • never taught", we are all adults now and they can YouTube and google whatever they do not know. I learned how to patch walls, change tiers, change oil, etc. All the gendered stuff I was never taught so I do not see why he can't as
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • Cheezburger Image 10481318656
    via d

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • well. My brother got put out by his girlfriend after they just had their first kid because he does not help with anything.
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • Since staying with me I have forced him to do stuff. When he first moved in my house went from my tidy, clean utopia to a disgusting mess. He would spit sunflower seeds on the flood, hide his food and dirty dishes around the house, spit chewed gum behind the coffee
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • machine feet from the trash can, hide snack food everywhere, smoke on the toilet and put cigs out on my floor (which is a slap in the face as I asked him to not even smoke inside because I do not smoke), leave his dirty clothes everywhere even on the living
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • Cheezburger Image 10481319168
    via Marc Dufrense

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • room floor, etc. Even when he ordered food for himself, he would eat at the table then leave it for me to put away for him. Anytime he took anything out of the fridge he would leave it on the table and would often leave the fridge open. I am not joking, I found maggots 3
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • times from his mess. I lost it and told him to change his behavior totally or get out. Well, he started doing stuff but as badly as he could. He would put bowls in the dish washer so they would be
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  • filled with nasty water, mop with the same water for days on end leaving it smelling of rot, do his laundry by putting it in the washer and leaving it for me to finish, put food away by throwing it all over the fridge spilling food everywhere.
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • The best was when he put the syrup away upside down on the top shelf with no lid on coating my entire fridge in syrup that took hours to clean, etc. Then he would say "I am trying you are just being a b&tch".
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • I lost my temper, and I know I couldn't leave him on the street, so I divided the house. The cabinet doors all have locks from the previous owners, so I got him from dishes from goodwill and forbad him from using any of my dishes so he is eating off his filthy dishes. I
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • made it very clear that anything left on the floors (clothing, etc) gets a one-day grace period then it will be thrown away. Same with the few dishes he has as he would leave them in the sink until they started to grow mold. I started
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • locking my bathroom door and he has to use the one in the basement which I refuse to clean. If his clothes are in the washer for more than 8 hours and I need to use it, I dump them wet on his bed. Any trash he leaves laying around goes
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  • on his bed. If he orders food and gets up and leaves his leftovers, I leave them to rot, then they get thrown away (though twice the idiot has left food out overnight and came out and started angry eating it whilst glaring at me. Both
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  • times the idiot got food sickness). He destroyed my fridge again putting juice in upside down with the lid barely on once again destroying my food, so I mopped it with towels and dumped the towels and all my ruined food on up
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  • his bed then put a lock on the fridge. He hates me and says I am terrorizing him. I say I was forced to mother him as a child but was never given the parental control to actually teach him how life works.
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • And since my brothers used my childhood to treat me like a maid, I will no longer parent them. My view is, some lessons have to be learned painfully. I will not gentle parent a grown man who cannot close a fridge door. ATIAH?
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • UPDATE: I could not believe my eyes when I opened reddit and saw the number of notifications. Wow. So just to update everyone, things. came to a head today. I had to work the early shift and had session with my table tonight at 6
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • (I am DM'ing a few DND games) I begged my brother to keep the living room clean. I came home and the house was more than trashed. I mean it looked like a bomb went off. He even dropped a cup of milk on the floor and left it. I
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • flung the whole milk jug at his head and screamed at him to GTFO. He tried to bulk up to me and I lost it screaming "get out" over and over and I guess he saw how unhinged I was because he stormed out. I cleaned up the milk
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • then jumped online to message everyone to cancel and saw the 700+ notifications. You all gave some really solid advice, and I knew reading the replies last night that this was over. I was gonna give him a few weeks but seeing that milk all across my new floor was
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  • the last straw. IDK where he is going, I don't care. I Thank you all! I love reddit people. End of update.
    via ThrowRA-Hanshotfirst
  • IntraVnusDemilo Get him out. Why is he even living with you?.
    via IntraVnusDemilo
  • OddGuarantee4061 NTA. Kick him out. He is an adult. It is not your responsibility to keep him off the street any more than it is your responsibility to clean up after him. Let him live with one of your other brothers.
    via OddGuarantee4061

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family drama inheritance aita AITAH brother mother tradition siblings family feud favoritism wedding aunt in laws mother in law sister fiancé grandmother Father
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