'I want some security': Stay-at-home dad demands legal entitlement to 50% of his wife's business in exchange for quitting his job to raise their children, then the wife freaks out claiming he's being ‘greedy’

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Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor
Mar 23, 2025 6:00 AM EDT

Being a stay-at-home parent is a huge sacrifice. You're putting your career on hold, and while the rest of the world keeps turning, you're devoting your energy, time, and entire life to a tiny human. It's no small feat, but it's one that often gets overlooked. This man, who was the optimal choice in his marriage to become the stay-at-home parent, was a little reserved about relinquishing his career, but his breadwinning wife didn't see it that way. 

If you were fortunate growing up, one of your parents was a stay-at-home guardian. This was a societal norm at one point in history, as single-income families were boasted, and the economy was healthily growing. Alas, in recent years, even surviving as a solo individual, free of roommates, parental aid, or government assistance, feels impossible—and that's without the added financial burden of children. Kids are expensive and require a lot of time and care, so assigning one parent to be the stay-at-home parent makes sense—if you can afford it. 

However, the greatest cost of being a SAHM or SAHD is the future growth of your career…

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  • My mom was a stay-at-home parent. She worked hard to make lunches, drive us to soccer practice, and was always available for our family for decades! However, when my parents split up, she was left with no career history and no prospects financially. Now, with both kids grown and no husband to support her, she works overtime hours at a minimum-wage job to keep food in the fridge. Perhaps if she had been more scrutinous like the guy in this next story, that wouldn't be the case…

  • Cheezburger Image 10482717696
    via SeventyFour

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • "AITAH for telling my wife I want part of her property if she wants me to quit my job?"

    My wife (33F) and I (34M) have been married for five years. She owns a successful real estate business that she started before we met, and I work as a project manager. We don't have kids yet,
    via ViniciusFromBcn
  • but she recently told me she wants to start a family soon, and that when we do, she thinks it would be best if I quit my job to manage the household and future children. She told me while handing me this, saying it would help me, assuming I would accept it instantly.
    via ViniciusFromBcn
  • The Ultimate Stay-at-Home Dad Your Essential Manual for Being an Awesome Full-Time Shannon Carpenter Father
    via ViniciusFromBcn
  • I was surprised because we've always been a dual-income household, and I enjoy my job. She argued that since her business brings in significantly more money, it makes sense for
    via ViniciusFromBcn
  • me to stay home while she focuses on expanding it. She also said she'd feel more comfortable knowing that when we have kids, I'm the one raising them instead of relying on daycare or a nanny.
    via ViniciusFromBcn
  • Cheezburger Image 10482710016
    via urbazon

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • I told her I'd consider it, but if I give up my career, I want to be legally entitled to a share of her business. If our marriage lasts forever, it wouldn't matter, but if
    via ViniciusFromBcn
  • we ever divorce, I'd be giving up my career advancement while her business keeps growing. She was shocked and said I should trust her and that this felt "transactional."
    via ViniciusFromBcn
  • I tried to explain that this isn't about not trusting her, I love her, but if I leave the workforce, I'd lose earning potential while her wealth increases. I'm fine with making sacrifices for our family, but I want some security in return.
    via ViniciusFromBcn
  • When I mentioned this to a couple of friends, they said I was being greedy and acting like I was planning for the marriage to fail. One even said I should be grateful she's offering to support me at all.
    via ViniciusFromBcn
  • I'm starting to wonder... am I being too cold or calculating about this? AITAH?
    via ViniciusFromBcn
  • Cool_Dot_4367 NTA, not at all for thinking ahead. I wish more SAHM/D had the foresight to think this way, me included. No one wants to think they marriage will fail, but you never know.
    via Cool_Dot_4367
  • ZookeepergameW NTA. Reddit is full of people telling women NOT to become SAHMs, because of the lack of financial security it causes.
    via ZookeepergameW
  • angelmakr9 Post nuptial agreement is in order. Would your friends be saying you're the ah if you were a woman?
    via angelmakr9
  • DriftingHermit ⚫ NTA if the roles were reversed your friends would be telling your wife not to give up her job with zero security and that this is how financially ab ive relationship start, what you're asking is more than reasonable considering the situation
    via DriftingHermit
  • prettyNova_ NTA. Its better to play it safe. Cos if she wants you to give up your job then there's gotta be something to fall back on if things go haywire
    via prettyNova_
  • xtnh If you are being greedy, what is she being? She wants her business, her kids, her free time, and you on the hook.
    via xtnh
  • SunnyLittleFuexle NTA this is what people have been trying to tell women for years. Of course you need some kind of security. Raising kids is not a small job and it's so important.
    via SunnyLittleFuexle
  • mags7683 I will tell you like I would tell anyone else. You should never put yourself in a position to solely rely on another. Keep your job.
    via mags7683

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stay at home mom family drama dads stay at home dad famiies drama kids brother siblings moms parenting dad story family sibling sister stories parent mom cousins parents
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