“When did PTO become Part Time Off?”: 21 reactions from seasoned employees offering off-grid comebacks and advice

In the quest to outdo the laws of physics, the corporate world has made a groundbreaking discovery: employees are not actually off when they're "off." It seems companies have established their own version of Newton's laws, but with a twist. Instead of gravity pulling objects towards each other, corporate gravity pulls employees towards their email inboxes, no matter where they are in the universe.

In this bizarre new physics, the laws of motion no longer apply. Objects (employees) can be in two places at once: on vacation and simultaneously checking work emails. This phenomenon is made possible by the invention of the "digital leash," a device so powerful it can stretch across continents and time zones, ensuring that no employee truly escapes.

Meanwhile, the principle of conservation of energy has also been reinterpreted. While employees' personal energy dwindles with each email checked during vacation, companies seem to gain an inverse amount of control, absorbing all the energy spent on "out-of-office" responses.
The most astonishing aspect of this new science is its law of disorder. It always increases unless acted upon by corporate forces. In this strange world, employee autonomy decreases while corporate control becomes all-encompassing.
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"When Did PTO Become Part Time Off"

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So, will we ever find a way to defy these corporate laws of nature and enjoy PTO as intended? Or are we doomed to live in a universe where "time off" is just an optical illusion? Only time will tell, but until then, don't forget to pack your charger on vacation.
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Pack a bathing suit and all of your responsibilities

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An office away from office

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