‘I woke up to find her stuff gone, she left me with the full rent due in three days’: Roommate stops paying rent and disappears overnight, stealing shared belongings after 24-year-old refuses to cover for her a second time

Author image for Etai Eshet
Etai Eshet • Editor
Apr 26, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

Most roommate rants are the stuff of urban legend: wild tales of shared bathrooms slowly turning into biohazards, heated debates over what exactly counts as "quiet hours," and the crisis triggered by discovering just how many decibels a single bowl of cereal can produce at 2 AM. These complaints aren't just cliché—they're an ancient rite of passage, a way for adults to process the unavoidable truth that nobody on earth would choose to have a roommate if rent weren't more terrifying than the roommate themselves. Let's face it: deep down, everyone just wants (or rather, is brutally forced by their bank account) to have another human around to halve the pain of paying for shelter.

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  • That’s what makes this story such a fascinating upgrade from the old “she left hair in the drain” saga. Here we have a roommate who dared to dream bigger—she skipped the hygiene debates, breezed past the decibel wars, and went for the gold: simply stopped paying altogether. Why argue over whether her boyfriend can nap on your couch when she’s decided to stage a one-woman rent strike? Now that’s innovation in the art of cohabitation.

  • 01

    "AITA for refusing to pay my broke roommate's rent again, causing her to move out suddenly?"

    "I refused and told her I wasn't a bank. She called me heartles❞
    via Liza Summer

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02
    I (24F) am a struggling grad student sharing an apartment with my roommate (25F). We've been living together for nearly a year, and it's been mostly fine until recently.
    via FineCriticism3085
  • 03
    My roommate lost her job two months ago and has been struggling to pay her half of the rent. I've been sympathetic, covered some utilities, and even bought groceries we share. Last
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  • 04
    month, she asked if I could cover her portion of the rent "just this once" while she looks for work. I agreed because I had some savings, though it was tight for me.
    via FineCriticism3085
  • 05
    Cheezburger Image 10498043648
    via izusek

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 06
    This month rolls around, and she still doesn't have a job. Yesterday she tearfully asked if I could cover her rent again, promising she'd pay me back "as soon as she gets
    via FineCriticism3085
  • 07
    back on her feet." I told her I couldn't afford to keep covering for her and suggested she reach out to her parents (who I know are well-off).
    via FineCriticism3085
  • 08
    She broke down, saying her parents would make her move back home if they knew she was struggling, and she'd have to leave the city and her boyfriend. She begged me to help "just one more time."
    via FineCriticism3085
  • 09
    I refused and told her she needed to figure something out because | wasn't a bank. She called me heartless and said "a real friend would help in a crisis."
    via FineCriticism3085
  • 10

    NOT a Bank

    Cheezburger Image 10498043136
    via SDI Productions

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 11
    This morning, I woke up to find her stuff gone and a note saying she's moving in with her boyfriend. She also took our
    via FineCriticism3085
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    microwave and coffee maker (which we bought together) and left me with the full rent due in three days.
    via FineCriticism3085
  • 13
    My other friends are split - some say I was right to set boundaries, others think I should've helped her "one last time" since now I'm stuck with the full rent anyway.
    via FineCriticism3085
  • 14
    AITA for refusing to cover my unemployed roommate's rent a second time?
    via FineCriticism3085
  • 15
    False_Garden_3468 I would definitely call her parents and explain that their daughter ran out and owes gou 3 months' rent and community property. The fact that she moved in with her boyfriend says she is willing to help pay his expenses.
    via False_Garden_3468
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    Also, tell her parents know that you would be recovering past due expenses through small claims court, and more often than not, they also get damages, which totals more than what was owed.
    via False_Garden_3468
  • 17
    You don't owe her protection from her parents. She's an adult who owes and needs to pay. Nta
    via False_Garden_3468
  • 18
    Pikelets_for_tea NTA. Contact her parents and ask them to reimburse you for last month's rent and for whatever notice period she should have paid. Send proof you paid all the rent last month.
    via Pikelets_for_tea
  • 19
    They might pay you, it is worth a try. Certainly satisfying revenge. Edit: And a lot quicker than small claims court.
    via Pikelets_for_tea
  • 20
    No-Adhesiveness If she's on the lease she's still on the hook for her portion whether she lives there or not.
    via No-Adhesiveness
  • 21
    solardune NTA. Last time was supposedly "the last time" so how do you, and your friends, know if this time she asks for rent money is the actual last time? You don't.
    via solardune
  • 22
    Your friend is an adult who needs to manage her own money. You helped her once and that was good of you, but you're right, you're not a bank.
    via solardune
  • 23
    AmeliaLunar you're not a bank, and it's not your job to carry someone who won't find a way to help themselves. She bailed on the rent and took shared stuff, so don't feel guilty for setting a boundary she didn't respect.
    via AmeliaLunar

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