Mother refuses to bring her kids to celebrate Mother's Day with her ex-husband, his new wife, and their new baby: ‘The kids make a point of spending as little time as possible with her’

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
May 8, 2025 3:00 PM EDT

If you're a divorced mom, you know how difficult it is to find ways to split kid time with your ex-spouse (unless you have a court order, of course). If your ex-spouse finds a new partner and they intend to play mommy to your biological children, especially on a holiday such as Mother's Day, then you make sure they know that's not going to fly. At the end of the day, kids should be with their mothers if you've continued to be a mother to them. The kids in this story don't want to spend the holiday with their stepmother, either. If you try to force a bond that doesn't exist, you'll face more isolation than if you left it be…

The woman who posted this story explains that she has never seen eye-to-eye with her ex-husband's new wife. The two just had a new baby, so she's celebrating her first Mother's Day as a biological mom. She insists that, on top of that, the woman and her kids celebrate Mother's Day with her. Not only is that strange, but it's entitled as well. Scroll below to see how the story unfolds, including how the kids feel about the matter.

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  • Cheezburger Image 10502926080
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • "AITA for refusing to spend Mother's Day with my ex and his wife celebrating her so our kids will?"

    My ex-husband and I share custody of our 17 year old daughter and 15 year old son. We divorced 12 years ago and co- parented with difficulty ever since. My ex is remarried and
    via NoNet8861
  • there were tensions between the three of us for the majority of that time. My ex's wife came in with huge expectations of what she would be to the kids and how involved I would be and none of it was realistic.
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  • . • She thought I would agree to giving my ex primary custody and I would be a one weekend a month mom. When that wasn't what happened she expected everything mom related to be split equally between us. So alternating Mother's Day, taking turns doing the
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  • Mother's Day events at school or activities and even changing who was listed as their mom on certain forms. And she really believed that was something I would do and something that would cause zero problems with schools and doctors.
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  • • She expected the kids to call her mom as soon as her wedding ring was on her finger and she believed I would "encourage", meaning force, them to call her mom. This was a long standing expectation that never got met. Not one time.
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  • • She expected to have the same legal authority as my ex and I had. And that she would get to make certain decisions for the kids without my ex's or my input. Those being where they went to school, what doctors they saw and what summer camp's they'd go to and for how long. She also expected to decide a religion for them.
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  • • She wanted to change their last name to a hyphenated name with hers and mine and ex's. She fully expected this to happen too. There was more than a year of her throwing a tantrum because I shut the idea down.
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  • My ex's wife comes from money and is used to having things her own way. So not getting her expectations met made her increasingly bitter toward me.
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  • She alienated my kids by being too pushy, controlling and trying to change their lives to fit what she believes they should be. Case in point she tried to fight to get them into private school and pressured them to ask me. She
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  • wanted my daughter to be in cheer and music classes up to 6 times a week and she wanted my son in football and boxing six times a week. My kids weren't interested in those activities and she brought them along multiple times and tried to make them take part. She told them that's what boys and girls did.
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  • She insulted the parents of my son's best friend and then attempted to stop all contact between the two kids. She hated me for refusing to back her up.
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  • The kids hated her for all of this. While she was thinking of them as her kids, they were wishing their dad would divorce her and I know they asked at least twice for him to do just that. When his wife learned she blamed me.
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  • The kids make a point of spending as little time as possible with her. They do not appreciate her and that bothers my ex and his wife. He and I have discussed
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  • it but he told me they should and that I was bitter for not making them appreciate her. He said she made their lives better no matter what the kids think or say.
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  • My ex and his wife did not have a child together until last year and this coming Mother's Day is her first one as a mom. The day has always been a sore topic for her because the kids are with me and
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  • she have anyone but my ex treating her like a mom. Now she officially is one and she believed that would mean my kids would be there for Mother's Day going forward but they set the record
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  • straight, as did I when asked about it. Now my ex has come up with this insane idea that I should spend the day celebrating his wife and join in their Mother's Day celebrations. He said she's worth celebrating, it's her first time having her own child on Mother's Day and our kids should be there but won't if I'm not.
    via NoNet8861
  • Cheezburger Image 10502926336
    via Hollie Santos for Unsplash

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • I shut his idea down hard and told him I would not spend the day with his wife. He tried to turn it into a fight but I walked away from him and have not answered his calls since. He has sent a few texts telling me I need to
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  • reconsider. But I ignored those as well and then he sent his sister after me. She told me it was so petty of me to not even consider meeting in the middle somewhere and then she stated I was r de
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  • about everything. She said I was the reason the kids didn't like their stepmother and with a half sibling now I needed to figure it out. I walked away from her as well but more texts from my ex followed.
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  • The only thing giving me pause is the fact my ex's family doesn't like the new wife. So the fact ex's sister said what she did is making me question a tiny bit if I'm TA.
    via NoNet8861
  • Coffee4Redhead No advice, just wanted to say NTA. And thank goodness the kids are almost grown. Could you go to court next year once the youngest is 16, so they don't have to go visit them anymore?
    via Coffee4Redhead
  • Creepy-Stable-6192 NTA. She is insane and I suggest you take all of this evidence to a lawyer and change the custody agreement. She needs to be a one weekend a month step mother.
    via Creepy-Stable-6192
  • ImAlsoNotOlivia So, your ex won't be at all surprised when his kids go completely NC with him once they turn 18, right? Good lord, what are those two smoking anyway? They sound like total nutcases.
    via ImAlsoNotOlivia

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family dynamics family drama aita entitled parents blended family reddit story family feud parenting family reddit thread Reddit Parenting Fail parents children Parenting FAILS
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