'You are not entitled to my bank account': 29-year-old broke sister demands older brother help her out with rent, he claims it is becoming a pattern and refuses, parents take sister's side

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
May 12, 2025 7:00 PM EDT

Being a sibling is a lot more than just hiding their phones while they are not looking, so they'll spend hours frantically looking for it while you're silently laughing at them behind their back. Sure, those little moments are fun and perfectly depict the idea of siblings, but we all know there is actually a lot more to it. Siblings should have each other's backs, they should support each other and do whatever they can to make sure their family is happy.

A sibling is also one of the only people who can use the 'tough love' card when it is needed. They can be as blunt and upfront as required to ensure their sibling does not lose themselves, does not give up, or surrender to life's challenges. They know what to say and do, and they will use no filters as they do so.

When someone is struggling financially and they turn to their sibling for help, help is what they would get, even if it is not in the form of money. Sometimes, all it takes is some honesty, which is what the brother was giving his younger sister in the story below.

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  • When the 29-year-old sister approached her brother asking for money, she wanted to use her sibling privilege and receive his help without pushback. However, the brother knows his sister all too well, and he knows that even if he gives her money, it is not going to help, so he decided to try a different approach.

    Keep reading to find out if it worked.

  • 01
    wwww
    via shisuka

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    AITAH for not helping my sister financially even though I could afford to?

    I 32M have done pretty well financially over the past few years thanks to a business I started that finally took off I recently bought a house and I live comfortably I am not rich but I am in a good spot
    via unloseable849
  • 03
    My younger sister 29F has had a rougher time She works part time lives paycheck to paycheck and recently asked me if I could help cover a few months of her rent so she could catch up on bills
    via unloseable849
  • 04
    Thing is This is not the first time I have helped her before and every time I do it ends up becoming a pattern I told her gently that I could not keep bailing her out and that I
    via unloseable849
  • 05
    wanted her to find something more stable She got upset and told me I was being selfish and that family should help each other no matter what
    via unloseable849
  • 06
    Now my parents are involved They think I am being cold and that I owe her some support since I have more than enough
    via unloseable849
  • 07
    But I am trying to set boundaries and not feel guilty for saying no AITAH for choosing not to help this time around?
    via unloseable849
  • 08
    Xanax-n-Wine NTA. And your sister IS the way she is because your parents enable her.
    via Xanax-n-Wine
  • 09
    Scorp128 NTA Mom and Dad can foot the bill if they have feelings about this. Sis, and anyone else for that matter, are not entitled to your bank account. You do not owe anyone anything.
    via Scorp128
  • 10
    Sufficient-Lie1406 This. How is your sister's failure to launch YOUR problem? Is OP supposed to support his sister her entire life? This is bonkerpants. NTA
    via Sufficient-Lie1406
  • 11
    Nothing_Special5645 NTA, you were generous and helped her before, you don't owe her anything, people like this will drag you down like an anchor if you let them.
    via Nothing_Special5645
  • 12
    BUD GOL 40022900 TAG 100 va002259cs
    via Africa images

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 13
    Opinionated6319 She's lazy, irresponsible and a mooch. She could work a full time job like everyone else. If parents b. in, tell them to support and enable this immature example of an adult!
    via Opinionated6319
  • 14
    I'm glad you set boundaries! it's not your responsibility or anyone else's to support her. Ignore the guilt-shame family and continue to break their dysfunctional pattern of "you owe, because it's family"
    via Opinionated6319
  • 15
    KNBthunderpaws She's living paycheck to paycheck because she's only working part time. If she got a second job or worked full time, she'd be better off financially. At 29, there's really no excuse for her not to be working overtime to get ahead. She's lazy and you shouldn't have to support that. NTA
    via KNBthunderpaws
  • 16
    JimmyCorbiere NTA. She will keep coming to you every single time until she just doesn't even try anymore. You are just being a safety net for her if you keep helping. And I am guessing she has never paid you back.
    via JimmyCorbiere
  • 17
    ncPI In a word. Nope. If your mom and dad want they can chip in. Honestly.. you will be doing this the rest of your life or her life. If you're okay with that. Then fine.
    via ncPI
  • 18
    sparksgirl1223 "Sis, if part-time work isn't enough, it's time to go full time or find a second part-time job. I can not help you with money. You need to help you.
    via sparksgirl1223
  • 19
    joesbalt You can give her 10 grand She'll be back You can give her another 10 grand She'll be back
    via joesbalt
  • 20
    The second you say, I've done enough ... She'll call you an a h le Save yourself the time and money
    via joesbalt
  • 21
    RubyTx Let your parents pay her rent. You stop enabling her. NTA.
    via RubyTx

Tags

family drama aita kids brother mother siblings work reddit story rent loan family sister Reddit money women parents children Father
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