16-year-old gets chastised for not helping her dad's new girlfriend, who is pregnant, after the woman was unkind to her: 'She's extra bitter that dad's so focused on making our relationship work instead of on her'

Author image for Brad Dickson
Brad Dickson • Managing Editor
May 31, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

Grief is a hard nut to crack; there's just no two ways about it. There's no way of speeding through it or predicting what course it will take, either; when it will show up day to day or month to month, and how it will present itself. Scars don't fade quickly, and having people place demands or expectations on you during this time is sure to cause you to crumble under the pressure or lead to long-term and lasting effects.

This 16-year-old girl was struggling to cope with the loss of her mother when her world was turned on its head again with the arrival of a woman who claimed to be carrying her father's baby, only 9 months after the loss of her mother. Everything was moving far too quickly, and the girl felt that this was hypocritical of her father since he had always criticized others in similar situations. The mutual bad feelings and the difficult situation presented, combined with the changing family dynamics and extremely complex emotions caused everything to boil over, prompting the girl to move out of her father's home and move in with her grandparents, something her father's new girlfriend took further offense too, especially when the father continued to try and make things work with his daughter.

Who knows what prompted this and what the father's true feelings are? Maybe he made a mistake after the loss of his wife and is trying to do right by them, but this is certainly one situation with no clear-cut right answer. What is clear though is that the girl needs time to grieve and support, support that she is lucky to be able to receive from other family. 

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  • 01

    "AITA for not helping my dad's pregnant girlfriend and telling her to [buzz] off when she asked?"

    My mom d d 14 months ago and ss been tough since. I (16f) always had a great relationship with my dad before but lately it's been pretty awful. 4 months ago my dad brought this woman home, told me she was his girlfriend and that she was pregnant and moving in with us. This was 9 months after my mom d d. I didn't really know what to say at first. He was scrambling to say stuff but I don't really remember what he said. But when I did speak, I was bitter and I told him I guess he found a great way
    via ScreamingTeen999999

    The image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    Cheezburger Image 10512104192
    via Brooke Cagle

    The image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 03
    I said that because he had always talked about people moving on within like two years of their husband or wife d ng as never really loving them and got over them super fast. He'd say that loving someone and being ready to move on would take a much longer time. He said he saw it in family and family friends who'd been through the loss. He said the people who moved on super fast were disrespectful. Especially when they had kids who had lost a parent and needed to be supported and their parents mem
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 04
    So I took it really hard when dad was admitting he'd knocked someone up 7 months after my mom d d. They'd started each other 5 months after mom d d. Which is something I hate thinking about but he admitted it. His girlfriend got extremely p ed off when I was saying that stuff to dad about him not loving mom. She took offense that I was focusing on that instead of on the news of a baby and greeting her. I ignored her and kept telling my dad what I thought and she
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 05
    lost it and said I should be excited about the baby. She said mom was de d and dad had a right to a life after her. She said the baby didn't deserve this sh. She moved in that day and dad spent days trying to make me okay and to apologize for it all happening so fast. His girlfriend didn't want me there and said I needed to leave if I wouldn't welcome her and celebrate the baby. Dad said no but I told him I wanted to go. He tried to fight it but I asked him if he ever wanted a relationship with
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 06
    I moved in with my grandparents. Dad comes to see me multiple times a week. He's talked me into going to the house for dinner a couple of times but me and his girlfriend do not like each other. She's extra bitter that dad's so focused on making our relationship work instead of on her and the baby. The last time I saw her was a month ago and she told me I was disgusting for not getting over myself and warming up to the baby who's coming whether I like it or not. She was also p ed that I wouldn't
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 07
    Last Tuesday I got a text from her, don't have her number but she said who she was, telling me she needed me to go over there NOW because she left her key in the house and got locked outside and she was in pain and having some bl ding and was supposed to rest. I still have a key to the house and dad was still at work. I off and I didn't go to help replied her. I blocked her number too.
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 08
    After that she used dad's phone to leave a voicemail yelling at me and calling me names for leaving her outside when she's 7 months pregnant. I ignored it and dad told me she just waited in the car until he got home. But she texted me in the middle of the night from dad's phone calling me a POS. My dad knows about it and he apologized. He's still trying to make this all okay with me but he also hopes we can all get along and be a family. AITA?
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 09
    Cheezburger Image 10512104704
    via Kajetan Sumila

    The image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 10
    HygorBohmHubner NTA. She basically told you: "your mom d d. Big whoop. Get over it" and expected you to be giddy for her and her pregnancy not even a full year after she d d. Nah, stay away from her, but you and your dad need counseling before the relationship gets irreparably damaged.
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 11
    VegetableBusiness897 She's just p ed that you aren't going to be her built in maid and babysitter. NTA
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 12
    Amazing-Wave4704 NTA. She has verbally attacked you from day 1. you were right to move out, you were right to block her, and frankly I realize dad's way of getting over his grief was (checks notes) a younger woman within a few months of your mom's death, knocking her up, tolerating her belligerent treatment of his grieving daughter, moving her in, and losing his daughter. It wasn't your job to help someone who has been horrifically r de to you. He s ks.
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 13
    th987 3d ago . I'm glad you have your grandparents. I hope they're good to you.
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 14
    DolwantToKnow6417 So, your father gave her your number? Anyway. NTA for extracting yourself from this unhealthy environment for you, and staying away.
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 15
    Consistent_Ice7857 I hope your dad is paying child support to your grandparents. Also, if you have any money in a bank account somewhere make sure dad doesn't have access!
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 16
    dncrmom Talk to you dad and ask for some of your mothers things like her jewelry & keepsakes. Take them to your grandparents place so this woman doesn't take or destroy them. NTA
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 17
    pepcorn NTA. Your dad sprung this lady on you. He didn't ask if you'd be okay with her moving in, showed no concern for your wellbeing and the sanctity of your safe space, your home. At a time when you needed that safe space more than ever. He just figured he could brute force you into accepting his second family. That's a calculated and cold move.
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 18
    And now you have a complete stranger in your home, telling you to get over your mother's death while you're still in the depths of your grieving process. An already difficult time has been made even more difficult. Most likely, this will be an injustice and a pain you're going to carry with you for the rest of your life.
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 19
    Now your dad wants to keep both of you happy, his new love interest and you. He thinks he's choosing both of you, but in reality, he's choosing his new love interest over you. Because you're the one who was put out. His new lady's needs, well-being, and so on, are not your responsibility. She waited inside of a car, she was out of the elements and safe. Plus, given her r de and cold behaviour thus far, I
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 20
    wouldn't put it past her that this was a power play on her part. I have little doubt that she wants to turn you into her child's parentified sibling, and if that can't happen, further poison your relationship with your dad so she can have his full attention. Focus on yourself from here on out. Your dad is not likely to snap out of this. I hope you can continue leaning on your grandparents. I'm sorry you've lost two parents, OP.
    via ScreamingTeen999999
  • 21
    lorn33 NTA! Pregnant woman here and I find her attitude disgusting! This poor lad lost his mum less than a year ago and has been treated horrendously by her and basically kicked out of his own home for not greeting her like open arms! She could have gone to a cafe or something to wait or been a better person and she'd have been treated better!! Being pregnant doesn't give her the right to treat a grieving son this way! Yea it was a bit harsh but I don't think he's TA!
    via ScreamingTeen999999

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Babies family dynamics teens family drama stepmother aita AITAH infant kids teenagers blended family siblings stepchild moms family feud parenting family pregnant reddit thread parent raising kids Parenting Fail parents children
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