'You’re not quirky. You’re just a bad guest with boundary issues': Entitled 22-year-old houseguest uses her hosts toothbrush, calls her uptight and aggressive for having a problem with it

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Jun 14, 2025 8:00 AM EDT

There's an art to staying over at a friend's house. You can't just show up, eat all the food out of their fridge, spread your clothes all over the place, and expect to get an invite back. A host is doing you an absolute solid by letting you sleep on their couch while you're visiting their city. Do you know how expensive hotels and Airbnbs are? You should at least buy them dinner or write them a "Thank you" note as a token of your gratitude. You should barely be able to tell that there's a guest staying there based on how much of your stuff takes up the living room. It's just common courtesy to be as undisruptive as you can possibly be. Of course, you can't fully be a fly on the wall (someone still needs to let you into the apartment), but you can do your best.

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  • 01

    AITA for telling my friend she’s not “quirky,” just a bad guest?

    So I (22F) had my friend Claire (not her real name) stay over at my apartment for a weekend. We've been close since college, she's the kind of person who proudly says "I'm not like other girls" and has strong opinions about oat milk. She's fun in small doses. Key word: small.
    via u/Sweet_Coconut_21

  • The houseguest in this story is the opposite of a fly on the wall. She's an outright tornado, destroying any and everything in her path. Her friend housed her for the weekend, and she messed with her fridge, bookshelf, and bathroom. The worst thing she did we definitely friendship-ruining. 

  • 02
    Cheezburger Image 10517048576
    via A. C. (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 03
    Anyway, I invited her to stay for two nights since she was in town for a concert. Seemed chill. She shows up with ONE tiny tote bag, a plant (??), and no toothbrush. She immediately kicks off her shoes, socks, and takes over my couch like it's a personal throne. Fine. Whatever. I'm flexible.
    via u/Sweet_Coconut_21
  • 04
    Then she opens MY fridge and says, "You don't have pickles? What kind of life are you living?"
    via u/Sweet_Coconut_21
  • 05
    ery produc quality i asier for promis tion F ings per 125 O GARLIC E Fresh Keeper
    via Darrien Staton

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 06
    I laughed it off, until she started "quirkily" reorganizing my spice rack by "vibes instead of function" and moved all my books by color. She said it "felt more aesthetically aligned with my energy." Ma'am, the energy is chaos.
    via u/Sweet_Coconut_21
  • 07
    TERRITORY OF LIES M JAMES RISEN 骈 PERLAIN BLACK CHRISTINE FALLS A TIME FOR HAR PAY ANY PRICE alaprill: Roben & More ༢༥ ངས ན་ ་ས་ ༢༥ ZALEK The PETTICOAT AFFAIR THE WORLD DERMAN WITHIN WAR Patricia O'Toole When Trumpets Call THE MYTH OF HITLER'S POPE INDED BY THE RICHT SHATTERED DREAMS. BROKEN PROMISES MICHAEL VINER કે! કેવલ બાર DAVID BROCK BETWEEN TWO FIRES HALMERS JOHNSON NEMESIS CHICAGO DEATH TRAP The Iroquois Theatre Fire of 1993 1 FINEST HOUR The Clayton and Phill Craig PETRATORS VICTIMS BYST
    via Jason Leung

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 08
    But the real kicker was Sunday morning. I walked into the kitchen and found her using MY toothbrush because "it looked like the one I use at home."
    via u/Sweet_Coconut_21
  • 09
    When I called her out (nicely, at first), she just giggled and said, "Don't be weird, I brush my teeth once a day, it's not that serious."
    via u/Sweet_Coconut_21
  • 10
    So I lost it. I told her flat out, "You're not quirky. You're just a bad guest with boundary issues." She packed her stuff and left early. Now she's telling people I was "aggressive" and "weirdly uptight."
    via u/Sweet_Coconut_21
  • 11
    Was I too harsh? I honestly tried to be nice about it but like... come on. MY TOOTHBRUSH??? TL;DR: Friend stayed over, reorganized my stuff by "vibes," used my toothbrush, and said I was weird when I called her out. I snapped a little. AITA?
    via u/Sweet_Coconut_21
  • 12
    Turmeric_Ping NTA. Tell your friends you were "weirdly uptight." about her using your toothbrush.
    via u/Turmeric_Ping
  • 13
    Sweet Coconut_21 OP LMAO right?? I should've said, "Yeah, I'm weirdly uptight about mouth germs and not wanting to swap DNA over Colgate. So sorry for the inconvenience." Honestly though, who sees someone else's toothbrush and thinks "perfect, that'll do!"
    via u/Sweet_Coconut_21
  • 14
    ScrewSunshine I wouldn't even use my bf's toothbrush, let alone anybody else's!!! Super super grossssss
    via u/ScrewSunshine
  • 15
    NoVisual8264 Oh....that toothbrush? That's what I clean the sink nozzles and grout with .. I keep my actual toothbrush in such and such location
    via u/NoVisual8264
  • 16
    LadysaurousRex Oh....that toothbrush? YOU USED THE BLUE ONE!?!?!?!? Ewwwwwwwww........
    via u/LadysaurousRex
  • 17
    TheRoadkillRapunzel NTA. I'd have told her you had a cold sore. Make her freak out about using your toothbrush.
    via u/TheRoadkillRapunzel
  • 18
    Sweet Coconut_21 OP LOL I wish I'd thought of that!! She would've spiraled SO hard, she once googled "can you get sick from hugging someone with allergies" so yeah, she would've lost it. Next time I'm definitely pulling the cold sore card.
    via u/Sweet_Coconut_21
  • 19
    perpetuallyxhausted I mean, why wait for next time? Text her saying "I'm still upset about what you did, but I'm not actually a terrible person so before you block me for having boundaries you should know that I have a cold sore on *place. Don't know how that works with you using my toothbrush and all but just thought I'd give you a heads up."
    via u/perpetuallyxhausted
  • 20
    zephyrjess If I were you I would make sure there's no 'next time' though
    via u/zephyrjess
  • 21
    PomegranateZanzibar I'd have considered getting physical about the books. They're already organized. Hands off.
    via u/PomegranateZanzibar
  • 22
    YankeeGirl53 Yes! You can look at the books, pick one to read, tell me I have strange taste in books...all good. But rearrange them! Oh no ma'am, throat punches will ensue. And the spices! Same thing. No ma'am!!
    via u/YankeeGirl53
  • 23
    LadysaurousRex NTA "You're not quirky. You're just a bad guest with boundary issues." this is incredible work and I am d_ng of appreciation
    via u/LadysaurousRex
  • 24
    BestLilScorehouse This girl is a loon.
    via u/BestLilScorehouse
  • 25
    youmustb3jokn Nta. Honestly she sounds like the friend you go to macha tea with but never a full meal. You invited her over for the ENTIRE WEEKEND. So now you know and you do not invite her over again.
    via u/youmustb3jokn

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friendship guests bad friend houseguest friends reddit story entitled brushing teeth boundaries reddit thread Reddit guest house guest entitled people toothbrush
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