Girlfriend in her 20s tells boyfriend it's 'lazy' to want to retire at age 60: 'What are you gonna do for the last 20 years of your life?'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Jul 14, 2025 10:00 PM EDT

Everyone has different visions of how they'd like their future to go. We all have different dreams and fantasies about what we'd like to do when we get older. I picture myself as an eccentrically-dressed old woman who has stopped caring about which patterns match and if that dress is too sheer to wear in public. I'll take my crusty little dog on walks around the neighborhood and spend my days reading fiction and baking weird cakes. I'll still engage in creative projects for fun, but I sure hope I don't have to rely on anything to keep me afloat financially. 

Hopefully, I will have made enough good decisions in my youth to set me up for a life of leisure in my old age. But unfortunately, nobody has a crystal ball. We never truly know what will happen to us until it actually comes to pass. 

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    WEEKLY MEAL PLA SATZT
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    My gf thinks I'm lazy for not wanting to work past 60

    I was having a conversation with my gf last night about work and retirement. We are both in our 20s. I said "once I hit 60 I'm done, I'm not working 50+ years full time. By that point I'd hope I'd made enough and saved enough to retire. My gf was shocked and said
    via u/jcdh214

  • That doesn't stop us from dreaming, though, and sharing our dreams with our partners. It's part of planning for your life together as a couple. If you have incompatible visions of the future, it might not bode well for you as a pair. That's what this couple came across when sharing their future plans. Read on to see what happened. 

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    she's gonna be working well into her 70s and maybe 80s. She claims I won't be able to afford to retire at 60 due to the career path I've chosen. And she also just finds it lazy. She was like "what are you gonna do for the last 20 years of your life?" I was like "enjoy it! Travel, enjoy family, actually be able to invest time in my hobbies".
    via u/jcdh214
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    Maybe we just have very different work ethics but i genuinely have absolutely no interest working full time as an elderly person. F that. If I can't have a retirement at all then what was the point of working 45 years straight? That's my opinion anyway. I do not live to work. I work to survive.
    via u/jcdh214
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    Commenters had sympathy for this man who wasn't willing to surrender the rest of his life to work.

    Sinaxramax • 19m ago She already adopted capitalist slave mentality, nothing to do for her
    via u/Sinaxramax
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    • Remote_City_6630 · 19m ago She may not have grown up experiencing a grandparent with a comfortable retirement. I would prove some of it to her on the financial side by showing how much is being saved and how much that will mean by the time you WANT to retire.
    via u/Remote_City_6630
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    Ghostyped • 13m ago . Work until you're de d? What kind of life is that. Might be time to ask some questions about what life means to them.
    via u/Ghostyped
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    Cheezburger Image 10529786368
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    Just_saying19135 • 12m ago . Your having this convo at 20? I would revisit in 30 years. Also if you can retire at 60, why wouldn't you?
    via u/Just_saying19135
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    DmG90_18m ago I'm almost 35 and I've been working 4/5 for 2 years now, hope to be FIRE within the next 10-15 years. You can buy alot with money, buy buying back lost time is not an option!
    via u/DmG90_
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    Background_Book... You're not lazy you're SMART! 12m ago
    via u/Background_Book2414
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    drunk_tyrant • 12m ago She's ceo material, that lady
    via u/drunk_tyrant
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    Evening_Rock5850 12m ago I decided to switch careers a while back which requires ~2 years of full-time training. I live pretty frugally, I saved a bit; and most importantly, I have a supportive spouse with a decent income.
    via u/Evening_Rock5850
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    So I quit, to train full-time to become an airline pilot. Then worked as a flight instructor for minimum wage to build time to get hired at an airline. The thing is, weather doesn't always cooperate and you don't always know! Sometimes you'll go days.
    via u/Evening_Rock5850
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    where you do basically nothing; there are other times where you're flying all day and/or well into the night because of various training requirements at various stages. But regardless, I had been working a lot in my previous role so even if I would fly 7 days a week; I felt like I had so much free-time. So I was unemployed. Busy, but unemployed.
    via u/Evening_Rock5850
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    It was, probably, the most productive period of my entire life. I helped friends and family with projects in their homes. I got into and out of a few hobbies. Learned a couple of utterly random and useless skills. I did so much stuff.
    via u/Evening_Rock5850
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    I hate this idea that our value or worth is tied to the wages we earn. When I helped my brother remodel his kitchen, or when I learned to appreciate movies more, or when I learned Python so I could program niche scripts for automations in my RV; you name it... I was being
    via u/Evening_Rock5850
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    productive. I was benefitting my own life, the lives of my family; and to some tiny extent; society too! I didn't make any money doing any of that, I was actively paying money to train (and later making so little it basically just paid for my gas to get to and from work, until I finally hit the airlines).
    via u/Evening_Rock5850
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    By the way, the FAA prohibits me from flying as an airline pilot past 65. There are some non-airline flying jobs I could still do. Who knows; I might if it's fun. But I'll probably just and tinker with sit on my a sh, or, I dunno, remodel my brothers kitchen again. Who knows. I had a mid-life taste of "retirement" and it's pretty sweet.
    via u/Evening_Rock5850
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    Adude09 11m ago She'll change her mind in like 10 years after burning out
    via u/Adude09
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    chompy283 · 9m ago It's not worth arguing about. Just shrug. It's 40 yrs from now
    via u/chompy283
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    BrownBannister · 10m ago I'm 45 and don't want to work another quarter century or more from this point, and I like my job!
    via u/BrownBannister
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    Socalbruh 10m ago So she wants to work until she's de d and is mad that you will spend decades working and saving and then enjoy your retirement? Maybe we are a broken people. Go spend your money on things you enjoy. Life isn't work. It's the things we do outside of work.
    via u/Socalbruh
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    Haunting-Traffic-... . 10m ago She'd hate me. I'm aiming for 50. If I'd had my sh together quicker it would have been 40. Why would anyone want to do grunt work to make someone else rich their entire life
    via u/Haunting-Traffic-203
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    zirwin_KC .8m ago I don't want to work full-time now (I'm 41). If I won the lottery or had a kindly uncle leave me an inheritance, work would never see me again.
    via u/zirwin_KC
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    Apprehensive_Low... .8m ago I mean, as someone in their late 30s, I can't wait to retire. I think your gf might change her mind in the next 40 years!!
    via u/Apprehensive_Low4865
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    himalayangoat · 7m ago Nearly 50 and I'd retire tomorrow given half the chance.
    via u/himalayangoat
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    • SpecialistSavings4... 6m ago I wonder if part of it is having never considered anything different. Where in your 20's are you? There's a difference between 21 and 29 for things like this.
    via u/SpecialistSavings434
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    Does she have hobbies outside of work? The other thing is that her values in her 20's will be different than her values in her 60's in terms of time and work
    via u/SpecialistSavings434

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