25+ of the Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (August 14, 2025)

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Aug 14, 2025 12:00 PM EDT

It's beginning to be our favorite time of the year. Back to school. We're taking trips to Target, armed with lists given to us by new teachers, helping our kiddos pick out just the right protractor. I don't know about you, but I used to love back-to-school shopping. I loved picking out all my new pens, deciding which folder would correspond to which subject. Of course, science was always green. I loved seeing the backpacks and the lunchboxes and deciding what my personality was going to be that year. Was I a yellow Tapper-Keeper girl, or was I going to embrace a multi-folder system? 

Maybe your kid is like me, and their eyes light up at the sight of a new highlighter. Or maybe your kid just wants to get it over with, and you have to convince them that they might need more than one notebook. 

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement

  • Either way, you're gearing up to send them back to school, and you're remembering what the routine is like. You're remembering just how early you have to get them to school and just how many lunches you have to pack. So odds are you need something that's going to help you get through. That's where these tweets come in. 

  • 01
    Simon Holland @simoncholland • 1h 0 I regret to inform you that we must all once again figure out what to make for dinner tonight.
    via @simoncholland
  • 02
    meghan No one: @deloisivete • 2h . My kid at bedtime: if you're a paleontologist, can you ask your boss if you can bring some fossils home
    via @simoncholland
  • 03
    Vinod Chhaproo @Chhapiness ⚫ 1h • Until I became a parent I never thought I would see another human cry because they stomped their own hands
    via @simoncholland
  • 04
    Hollie Harris @allholls ⚫ 2h My favorite summer holiday is Back to School.
    via @simoncholland
  • 05
    meghan @deloisivete. 14h 11yo: that guy was just walking around all nonchalant my 9yo: what does nonchalant mean 11yo: my 9yo: 11yo: I don't know me: *running in from the next room to give them the definition and etymology*
    via @simoncholland
  • 06
    Henpecked Hal @Henpecked Hal • 21h Just one more day until my kids go back to school. One 450-hour day.
    via @simoncholland
  • 07
    DADMANN WALKIN Dadman Walk... @dadmann_wal... 22h When I was a kid we knew that in order to get the name brand snacks we had to make friends fast with the kid in the big house.
    via @simoncholland
  • 08
    meghan • @deloisivete Aug 12 Every morning the kids and I play a fun little game called if you get your shoes on RIGHT NOW you won't be late for school
    via @simoncholland
  • 09
    DADMANN WALKING Dadman Wal... @dadmann_wa.... Aug 12 There is no better morning than when laundry is going with the scent of gain, coffee is made and is also in the air, and kids are still asleep and not talking.
    via @simoncholland
  • 10
    One Awkward... @oneawkward... Aug 110 • My 3yo was having a meltdown and to calm him down I had to let him eat pretend tacos out of my hand. This is the kind of stuff we should explain to new parents.
    via @simoncholland
  • 11
    Big, Bad Caffeinated Da... @Caff... . Aug 11 Sure I could put more effort into listening to my kids, But they could just make a podcast and I'd probably subscribe
    via @simoncholland
  • 12
    meghan @deloisivete • Aug 11 . Breaking news: neighbor kid unimpressed by our snack selection
    via @simoncholland
  • 13
    One Awkward... @oneawkward... Aug 11 ☑· . Kids be like, I see you have a moment to yourself and I must correct that immediately.
    via @simoncholland
  • 14
    Hollie Harris @allholls Aug 11 A wise mom once said, "Ask not what's for dinner, but what you can do to help make dinner." It's me. I'm the wise mom.
    via @simoncholland
  • 15
    meghan @deloisivete Aug 11 • Now that the kids are back in school, I need 3-5 business months to recover from summer ...
    via @simoncholland
  • 16
    Deena Lang @itsdeenalang. Aug 11 .. ... NOBODY is more full of sh than a socially anxious mom telling their kid how much fun they're gonna have making new friends at school this year
    via @simoncholland
  • 17
    DADMANN WXLXIV Dadman Wal... @dadmann_w... Aug 10 ☑· • please keep my 10 yo in your thoughts and prayers. He left his electronics at my sister's house an hour away and he has *checks notes* "nothing to do anymore but stare at a stupid wall".
    via @simoncholland
  • 18
    Late to the party ... @ericamorec... . Aug 11 She thought she could but she had to wait until her 11yr's school holidays were over before she could.
    via @simoncholland
  • 19
    • redyellowgreendanc... @RYGda... Aug 10 My son, walking with a cane, pretending to be an old man with old man voice: "Ooooh my aching back, I need to take my Altoids"
    via @simoncholland
  • 20
    SARCASTIC Sm MOMMY Sarcastic Mo... @sarcasticmo... Aug 10 ☑• Teen logic: “I'm old enough to make my own decisions... unless those decisions involve waking up before noon."
    via @simoncholland
  • 21
    • Henpecked Hal @Henpecked Hal ⚫ Aug 10 Took my kids with me to shop for school supplies amateur and I could literally feel like a myself aging as we walked through the aisles. ...
    via @simoncholland
  • 22
    SARCASTE Sm MOMMY Sarcastic Mo... @sarcasticmo... Aug 9 My husband made me a drink & told me to sit down while he makes dinner. I think he's buttering me up for...new golf clubs.
    via @simoncholland
  • 23
    paige @BonerWizard • Aug 9 3yo informed me today that he "likes to break things" so I told him he can't just break anything and that I will find him things for him to break. I feel like Dexter's dad.
    via @simoncholland
  • 24
    One Awkward ... @oneawkward... Aug 9 Ø • Picked up my son from his first day of jiu jitsu camp, asked how it went and he said, 'none of your business. Now I'm wondering if I signed him up for Fight Club by mistake.
    via @simoncholland
  • 25
    Daddy Go Fish @daddygofish • Aug 6 10yo: my friend has a girlfriend. me: would you like to have a girlfriend, too? 10yo: no way, I would rather have fun.
    via @simoncholland
  • 26
    • meghan @deloisivete Aug 6 me: can't believe the kids keep ignoring me low fuel light in my car: wow ok
    via @simoncholland
  • 27
    meghan @deloisivete Aug 8 Bye, have a great day. I'll see you after school, I tell the fruit cup in my kid's lunch
    via @simoncholland
  • 28
    Katie @rawrritskatie · Aug 6 Apparently our almost 2 yr old has discovered that he can put various foods up his nose. Love that for us & his daycare. Not ready for the 2's.
    via @simoncholland

Want More? Follow Us and Add Us as a Preferred Source on Google.

Tags

things kids say kids crazy things parents say funny parents parenting kids these days tweets funny parenting tweets parenting memes funny tweets parenting tweets tweet parent random tweets raising kids parents children
Scroll Down For The Next Article