'The level of disrespect is astonishing': Entitled parents give away 18-year-old daughter's room to exchange student over a week before she is due to move out, flip out when she protests

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Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
Aug 26, 2025 9:00 PM EDT

When kids begin to reach adulthood, there are two different approaches that parents take to the transition. Some insist on allowing them as much time as they need in the family unit, sometimes to an extent that is controlling. Others can't seem to wait to kick them out and leave them to fend for themselves, no matter what situation their children happen to be in.

In the case of this latter group, the transition from being part of a family to full independence can often be sudden and jarring. It often says a lot about the relationship between parents and kids, often giving young adults who are still growing up realizations about their family life that they didn't have before. Depending on the scenario, it can be a very difficult time, especially as it is around this age that many other major life transitions are also happening. Maintaining a level head isn't easy.

 

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    Cheezburger Image 10547048704
    via Roman Khripkov

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • One girl was left in disbelief when her mom emptied her bedroom while she was at work in preparation for an exchange student to move in over a week before she was supposed to move to her new apartment. On top of that, she announced that she would be using her car the next day, although she needed it for her commute.

    Her parents were livid when she protested at these developments, and gave her no choice but to couch surf with friends. She recounted what had happened.

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    My parents gave my room away to a foreign exchange student while I was at work

    i (18f) currently live with my parents and my younger sister. i recently got an apartment and im waiting to move in on the first of september. my mom came into my room about 5 days ago and said she needed pictures of my room. i asked her why and she said "for our exchange student." i was confused and asked what she meant bc i had heard nothing about this and she said "we're getting an exchange student and we need pictures of the house."
    via Local-Focus9071
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    well the next day i came home from my 12 hour shift and my mom said "oh by the way there's nothing in your room." i thought she was joking so i go upstairs and she was not. my bed frame is in the hallway my mattress on its side and everything i owned in the dining room. she then told me that their exchange student was flying in tomorrow and they gave her my room. i said where am i supposed to sleep and she told me the floor or figure out somewhere else to stay.
    via Local-Focus9071
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    Cheezburger Image 10547048960
    via Nathan DeFiesta
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    not only this but she told me she was taking my car to go get her tomorrow so i couldn't take it to work. my car is in my name and i legally own it so i told her no. well this turned into her yelling at me saying “idk why we even do anything nice for you bc you don't even care." and the "level of disrespect is astonishing." and she and my dad were downstairs saying how i was an ungrateful disrespectful sh. again i pay for everything i have and this was a week and a half until i move out. so i ha
    via Local-Focus9071
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    been couch surfing with friends and they are irritated bc i dont want to be home... like it makes me feel like they dont want me there. i was told nothing about an exchange student until the day before she was supposed to fly in and i come home the next day and they took everything i own out of my room and gave it away to someone from another country. and spent thousands redoing and redecorating her room. and then get upset that i dont want to be at home which honestly doesn't even feel like my
    via Local-Focus9071
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    chrome acer
    via Anete Lūsiņa
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    Commenters were outraged on her behalf.

    Curiously_Zestful You might not have a relationship with them in the future. For now, low contact. When I was in a similar situation with my parents many years ago, I had a simple standard. I would phone them once a month, and communicate until they said something nasty/derogatory, then I would hang up and ban them for a month. I told them that when they could go 3 months in a row without toxic behavior that I would visit them in person. It took them seven years.
    via Curiously_Zestful
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    TNTmom4 I'd call the student exchange agency they are using and tell them The type of situation they sent that poor child into.
    via TNTmom4
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    WifeofBath 1984 That is so cruel. I'm sorry OP
    via WifeofBath1984
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    RegretNo1323 Your parents sound awful.
    via RegretNo1323
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    Ok_Odyssey Your mom saying that YOUR "level of disrespect is astonishing" is unbelievably ironic. I'm so sorry op, you deserve better people in your life
    via Ok_Odyssey
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    mapofcuriosity Sorry OP. Your parents appear to lack empathy and I'm sure it has always been the way. For now follow BIFF, which stands for Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm and is a method for responding to hostile or high-conflict communications by keeping responses short, factual, polite, and decisive to de-escalate the situation and protect your reputation and mental health. Once you have your own home you can choose to go low or no contact. Best wishes for a wonderful future.
    via mapofcuriosity
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    EchidnaFit8786 Once you move out, go LC to NC. I say LC just so you can still speak to your sister.
    via EchidnaFit8786
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    unbelievablefidelity Never look back. So cruel of them.
    via unbelievablefidelity
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    laughter_corgis While your parents are out of house get all your important stuff out of the house. I'm sorry this is happening. They s k
    via laughter_corgis
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    CanadianJediCouncil I feel like OP should get her phone number to that foreign exchange student, so she/he is not isolated and/or unsafe with her family, who may start making unfair 'demands' on the student.
    via CanadianJediCouncil
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    Jealous_Art_3922 Did you get all your things out of the house and into temporary storage? I sure hope so, because you cannot trust them to respect what is yours if they want to use it, or if they want it gone.....
    via Jealous_Art_3922
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    wasakootenayperson The level of their disrespect is astonishing. Good thing you are moving.
    via wasakootenayperson
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    MildLittlRain Your parents are the worst! Keep distanse from them, once you move into your apartment cut contact with them untill they have apologized.
    via MildLittlRain
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    Ginger630 I'm so glad you're moving out soon. Your parents are disrespectful. Definitely don't let your parents take your car. It's YOURS. They didn't even ask! Plus you need it to get to work.
    via Ginger630
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    phdoofus This should be a wake up call to your little sister and you might have to be ready to take her in if she doesn't have a plan.
    via phdoofus
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    phdoofus Honestly, your parents sound pretty low on the list of 'good candidates for host family'.
    via phdoofus
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    Witty_Candle_3448 Go get your car. And report your parents to the foreign exchange agency.
    via Witty_Candle_3448
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    content_great_gramma Your parents have "disowned" you; return the favor. After you are able to move, go low contact with them if not no contact. As several other commenters have suggested, contact the exchange program and advise them just what kind what kind of situation they are putting their student in.
    via content_great_gramma

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