'Sometimes when you bluff you get called': Nanny walks out when family gets a new puppy because of her allergy, is upset they wont get rid of their new pet

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Sep 14, 2025 10:00 AM EDT

Being allergic to dogs is a fate that I'm lucky I don't have. It would be hard to avoid some of the most perfect creatures on Earth. But most allergy-havers manage to deal with it. They take medication, they avoid inhaling too much dander, and they go on their merry way. But this requires a lot of effort. This requires time and money and a willingness to feel a little bit bad. So it's also understandable that they would want to avoid the situation completely. 

But what if it's at the cost of a new job? It's hard enough to get a job as it is; you would hate to have to turn it down because of something neither of you can control. But that comes at a great personal cost to you. That's the situation this worker was in when she took a new job despite her allergy, but figured the problem would go away soon enough. But when it didn't, she had a plan to manipulate the situation to her advantage. At least she thought she did. 

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  • 01
    A woman holds a fluffy dog.
    via Unsplash+ (Mariela Ferbo)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Her plan, though, backfired, and left her without a job. But her (no former) employer was left wondering whether or not they made the right call. They can't just get rid of a dog they just adopted, right? Read on to see what happened in this story and decide who you think was in the right.  

  • 02

    AITAH for getting a dog when our nanny is allergic, not getting that she was bluffing when she said she wouldn't come back and that she wasn't quitting?

    Our nanny (now ex nanny) is allergic to dogs. We found this out during the interview process when she started getting allergy symptoms from the dander in our house from our dog, Koby. The nanny said it would be okay because she could just take allergy medication.
    via u/SlowBridge8621
  • 03
    Koby passed away in the beginning of last month from old age. A week ago we decided to get a puppy. I did text the nanny about the new dog before she came in so she would know to take her medication. She thought I was joking at first and became upset we got the dog because the house had finally gotten free of dander and was breathable again for her.
    via u/SlowBridge8621
  • 04
    I did bring up that she had previously said dogs were okay because she could take her medication, but she said she only said that because she was at the time desperate for a job and because our dog was old and not doing well and she thought he would di soon, but she didn't expect we would just go and replace him so quickly. She also said she didn't want to take the medication any more because of side effects and the cost so she said she wouldn't be coming back.
    via u/SlowBridge8621
  • 05
    I had to take a few days off because of this all, but thankfully we were able to figure out some other arrangements that will work for our daughter. However, the nanny texted back towards this weekend to ask if we had figured out the dog situation (like she expected we would be rehoming the dog) so she could come back to work this week. I told her we thought she had quit and that we had made new arrangements for childcare.
    via u/SlowBridge8621
  • 06
    She said that she had not quit and was only trying to make a point about how difficult it would be for her with the dog dander and get us to realize how important she was. It still seems like she quit to us though and we're not exactly liking the idea of taking her back since she tried to manipulate us.
    via u/SlowBridge8621
  • 07
    Another thing to add which I think is important is that she was not expected at all to take care of the puppy (or our previous dog) in any way.
    via u/SlowBridge8621
  • 08
    A woman stands outside a building with a dog.
    via Unsplash+ (Mariela Ferbo)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 09

    Commenters saw through this situation.

    . pookapotomus2 • 17h ago She shouldn't pretend to quit if she wasn't really quitting
    via u/pookapotomus2
  • 10
    SomeCallMeMahm 17h ago "I'm not coming back" would be classified as "job abandonment" if there wasn't enough articulation to be an out right resignation.
    via u/SomeCallMeMahm
  • 11
    cachalker 17h ago Well, she did, in fact, quit. "I won't be coming back" is about as definitive as it gets. There was no qualification. No attempt to negotiate. Just an assumption that you wouldn't be able to make other arrangements. She played a stupid game
    via u/cachalker
  • 12
    (deliberately inconveniencing you thinking she was indispensable) and she won a stupid prize (you accepted her immediate "resignation" and made other arrangements). It's a harsh lesson for her. The hired help is rarely indispensable. A PITA to replace, yes. But irreplaceable? Not typically.
    via u/cachalker
  • 13
    One_Violinist7862 · 20h ago • Sometimes when you bluff you get called. Hopefully she learned a lesson from this.
    via u/One_Violinist7862
  • 14
    Think_Storm_8909.18h ago She thought you would beg for her to come back and rehome the dog, and now she ran out of money. She should find a new job at some dog free house, it's better for her. And you need to hire a nanny who is suitable for your house and surrounding
    via u/Think_Storm_8909
  • 15
    Known_Witness3268 17h ago I love that she called and asked if you figured out what you were going to do. "Sure did. We're keeping the dog as I stated and we already got ride of you."
    via u/Known_Witness3268
  • 16
    nightcana 17h ago • Its just a poor fit. She shouldn't have taken a job in a home with a dog if her allergies are that bad. And you werent required to wait out her bluff when she 'quit'
    via u/nightcana
  • 17
    Federal-Ferret-970 - 18h ago Never bluff when your job is on the line. She is way out of line. NTA
    via u/Federal-Ferret-970
  • 18
    Clean_Permit_3791 · 20h ago • It's a job - if she doesn't like the working environment she needs to get a different one. She is meant to help your family, you shouldn't have to cater for her needs. NTA
    via u/Clean_Permit_3791
  • 19
    Kamena90 • 19h ago . NTA she said she wasn't coming back, that's quitting. She's also not reliable if she's willing to do that, so it's not a surprise that she really needed the job. Do you really want someone like this around your kid(s)?
    via u/Kamena90
  • 20
    • geekylace 17h ago While her services to you may have been excellent, she does not get to dictate whether you're allowed to get another dog and expecting you to rehome your dog is mind boggling to me. It honestly just sounds like she is no longer compatible with the job. Sorry for your loss, I hope your new puppy brings new joys to your life.
    via u/geekylace
  • 21
    JoMamaSoFatYo 17h ago • Unless she's Mary frickin' Poppins, she's expendable and replaceable. She just learned how true that is. NTA, but she was de-lu-lu for thinking you'd choose her over your new puppy. And yes, she 100% QUIT. No take- backsies...
    via u/JoMamaSoFatYo
  • 22
    Beanz4ever • 14h ago NTA She sounds a bit bonkers. She really thought OP would get rid of a new puppy because she LIED during her interview? "Sorry kids, gotta get rid of the puppy you just fell in love with!"
    via u/Beanz4ever
  • 23
    Also, I would be so annoyed at someone who told me that they'd just been waiting around for my dog to di and didn't think I'd get a new one. What?! The audacity to think that she can dictate OP's lifestyle is outrageous.
    via u/Beanz4ever
  • 24
    Happyweekend69 · 19h ago NTA, she's a nanny. She doesn't get to decide if you have a dog in your home or not just cause she spend a few hours there. One of my moms friends is scared of dogs and never asked us to get rid our put our dog away
    via u/Happyweekend69
  • 25
    when she visited, just to keep her away from her which we tried (for some reason our dog LOVED her) or my own friend who not much of a dog person I accommodate but like h II would allow them to tell me what I could do in my own home.
    via u/Happyweekend69
  • 26
    Lcdmt3 15h ago NTA - FAFO. Too old to be playing games. She quit. The end.
    via u/Lcdmt3
  • 27
    JadieBugXD • 16h ago NTA You didn't just get a dog knowing that she was allergic, she took a job where there was a dog, knowing she was allergic. You didn't change the terms of the agreement, she took the job knowing pet dander was part of it. I wouldn't take her back. She
    via u/JadieBugXD
  • 28
    thinks she can manipulate you, she literally made you miss work to try to prove a point, and likely won't treat the new dog well when she's in your home without you. Also, her plan backfired, she was "trying to make a point" and get you to "realize how important she was" but you obviously don't need her since you figured something else out.
    via u/JadieBugXD

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boss dogs antiwork workplace-stories allergic toxic-workplace job nannying bosses work coworkers working reddit story nanny toxic-boss workplace reddit thread bad bosses Reddit toxic-work-environment
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