Woman is accused of disrespecting boyfriend after he demands she no longer have long chats with her ex-husband inside his house, despite having a healthy co-parenting relationship, tension rises when she refuses: 'It is always about the kids'

Author image for Emma Saven
Emma Saven
Sep 28, 2025 5:00 PM EDT

Divorce is hard enough for children without having one of their parents' partners totally disrupt their parents' healthy co-parenting rhythm. I'm sure this mother's priority would be ensuring her children are comfortable and happy, not having to look after another (man)child who can't control their insecurities. This divorced woman has been dating her boyfriend for a few months, and all seemed to be going swell, until he started making comments about how it makes him "uncomfortable" when she goes into her ex-husband's house to discuss matters about their kids!

No matter how many times she tries to explain the friendly and close nature of their co-parenting relationship, which is extremely rare, by the way, he doesn't seem to budge on his small-minded opinion. It is not her job to make her boyfriend trust her, and on top of that, he clearly doesn't have her kids' best interest at heart either. Is this really the type of man who deserves more than three months of dating? Because we're not so sure a fourth month is even deserving.

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  • There is nothing romantic between these exes, as they are both seeing other people. Part of being an adult means obtaining the maturity to understand that your partner will have exes, and in many cases, especially in older relationships and when children are involved, those exes will have to stay a part of each other’s lives until their kids are grown, and likely even after that. So if this boyfriend is unable to handle that, he and his ego need to have a big heart-to-heart and get to the bottom of their issues.

  • 01
    Woman sitting in a convertible
    via rdne

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02

    AITA for going inside my Ex’s house?

    I (37F) was married to my ex- husband (42M) for 16 years. We got married really young, and we have two kids (7 and 11).
    via wewereonabreak29
  • 03
    We divorced about a year and a half ago, and honestly, we get along better now than we ever did married. Our co- parenting relationship is really solid.
    via wewereonabreak29
  • 04
    He still lives in the house we bought together, and I have my own place. We split custody 50/50.
    via wewereonabreak29
  • 05
    Here's the part that's causing drama: I regularly go inside his house when I'm picking up or dropping off the kids. Sometimes it's just to grab something they forgot for school,
    via wewereonabreak29
  • 06
    sometimes it's because they're not ready yet, and sometimes it's just to talk for a bit about issues going on with the kids, school, etc. It is literally always about the kids.
    via wewereonabreak29
  • 07
    There are zero romantic feelings there (he even has a girlfriend), and for both of us, it just feels natural and easy.
    via wewereonabreak29
  • 08
    The issue is with my new boyfriend. We've been dating a couple months, and he says it's super uncomfortable for him that I go into my ex's house at all.
    via wewereonabreak29
  • 09
    He thinks I should just wait in the driveway, garage, or car, and only talk to my ex when it's strictly about the kids.
    via wewereonabreak29
  • 10
    He feels it's "disrespectful" for me to spend time in there and have long conversations with my ex.
    via wewereonabreak29
  • 11
    Man and a woman talking while sitting on a couch
    via pocstock

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 12
    From my perspective, we're co-parents, we're friends, and being on good terms makes life better for the kids.
    via wewereonabreak29
  • 13
    But my boyfriend clearly feels strongly about it. I think I should be able to go inside the house without it being a huge deal.
    via wewereonabreak29
  • 14
    AITA for going into my ex's house and keeping a close co- parenting relationship?
    via wewereonabreak29
  • 15
    Impossible_Rain_4727 NTA: If your boyfriend is uncomfortable that you have a healthy, friendly co- parenting relationship, he is not the guy for you.
    via Impossible_Rain_4727
  • 16
    kslmp63 NTA and you might want to look for a new boyfriend. This jealous this early in a relationship is a huge no in my opinion.
    via kslmp63
  • 17
    True-Presentation726 The new boyfriend won't last. He doesn't. understand, and will never understand your solid relationship with your ex. And at two months he's already trying to alienate you from the ex. Just no.
    via True-Presentation726
  • 18
    Don't let this new guy ruin your great co- parenting friendship. If only all ex's were able to do it as well as you do with your ex. Your kids are hugely benefitting from your mature relationship with your ex. Your new boyfriend's insecurities will ruin the status quo if you even give him an inch. He's not mature enough to date you. NTA
    via True-Presentation726
  • 19
    capn_ginger NTA, but this is a big red flag. "Disrespectful" implies that you're the property of your bf, and that his property rights are not being respected. "Disrespectful" is not a word one would use to describe the behavior of a whole human person with agency and relationships outside of current dating who has done literally nothing wrong.
    via capn_ginger
  • 20
    Parents waving goodbye to their young daughter
    via afloimages

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 21
    the_booktender NTA. Your bf just threw up a red flag. Waiting outside would be fine if there was a problem between you two, but it does not sound like that is the case. And that is great. It is also between you and your ex. This bf does not get a say in how you and your ex do what is best for your children. Kind of a red flag.
    via the_booktender
  • 22
    BlondDee1970 NTA and ditch the new boyfriend. You're going to have the rest of your life at events with your ex with the kids - you do not need a jealous or controlling partner who can't get along with everyone.
    via BlondDee1970
  • 23
    Donutsmell NTA. If your boyfriend can't accept you being on friendly terms with the father of your children, then the boyfriend has to go.
    via Donutsmell
  • 24
    No-Foundation-4118 See those giant red flags now before he gets any worse. That is super controlling especially considering how short of a time you have been dating.
    via No-Foundation-4118
  • 25
    05730 You mean ex boyfriend. Your ex boyfriend is threatened by your ex husband.
    via 05730
  • 26
    keesouth NTA. Get rid of this BF. He needs to understand that getting along with the person you co-parent with is important. If he's so insecure that he can't handle that he needs to move on. It will only get worse.
    via keesouth

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Tags

children first boyfriend insecure raising children baby-dad conversations relationships parenting exes co-parents red flags friendly bothered wait-outside dating
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