‘If you can't beat them, confuse them’: Scientist baffles entitled colleague by showing kindness, leaves him confused in the dust to work a “desirable” PhD position

Author image for Elna McHilderson
Elna McHilderson • Managing Editor
Sep 28, 2025 9:00 AM EDT

It is common for colleagues to argue. Sometimes you just don't vibe with the person you're working with. C'est la vie. However, sometimes that can drive you insane. What do you do if you have to share a space and use your brain power next to someone who is the worst? Well, this scientist proves that kindness can be the best course of action. Why is that? Because it keeps you sane, but can make the other person short circuit. 

 

She proved this when she helped out this entitled coworker. He was always disrespectful and never a team player. It was always about him and he acted more important to anyone. Now, this woman could have helped this man crash and burn after discovering a mistake he made. But, instead, she remedied the situation and provided that same remedy to him. He was SO confused by her kindness that he reported it to the boss. He never figured out why she was kind and he stayed behind while she moved on to big and better things as a PhD. 

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  • Cheezburger Image 10558140928
    via Unsplash+ (and Getty Images)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • When I was working in a lab as an unpaid intern while I was waiting for the start of my PhD programme in a different town there was a group leader from a neighbouring group who was a complete j.
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  • He kinda reminded me of Odo from DS9 so let's call him that. My boss and him were good enough friends and she needed me to borrow some DNA called a plasmid, which basically is a little circle of DNA that tricks a bacteria into doing two things - making a protein and being resistant to antibiotic.
    via Novel-Structure-2359
  • Bacteria are lazy little critters and if you try giving them a plasmid that expresses a protein they don't like then they will do anything to stop having to make it - like grabbing the antibiotic resistance gene, stuffing it in their own DNA and ditching the rest.
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  • If you are sensible you always use a strain of bacteria that cannot do this stunt or you won't achieve anything and when you try to purify your precious plasmid from be bacteria you get nothing but water.
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  • This is important. I needed to borrow just a few microlitres of a plasmid from him that I knew for a fact bacteria would hate to have.
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  • j He acted like a total and gave me a third of what I needed. When I tried to use it to make bacteria resistant to antibiotic (and prove they were expressing the offensive protein) I got nothing.
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  • He acted like I was a useless idiot. He gave me some of his stock of bacteria that were already resistant.
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  • I grew them up, tried to purity the plasmid and got back water, just water. He didn't believe me again.
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  • He demanded I provided proof of the fact that these bacteria had no plasmid. After days and days I presented my evidence and grudgingly he gave me a straight DNA sample from his private stash.
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  • This worked an absolute treat, the cells were resistant to antibiotic and everything was as it should be.
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  • It was at that point it became clear to me that this big clever group leader had used the wrong strain of bacteria.
    via Novel-Structure-2359
  • Cheezburger Image 10558153472
    via Unsplash+ (and Getty Images)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Those little critters had ditched the nasty bit of his plasmid and kept the antibiotic resistance all to themselves.
    via Novel-Structure-2359
  • This was a rookie mistake and as a rookie I had spotted it. I used the right strain, grew up a whole bunch of the bacteria and made several preps of top quality DNA.
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  • I could have just let it lie and let him figure out his own problems. However, instead I decided to do what he least expected.
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  • I breezed into his lab, casually dropped off a tube of 50 microlitres of freshly prepped DNA and plate with freshly grown correct bacteria - which would let him prepare a limitless supply.
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  • I didn't hang around for him to say anything and breezed on out. A few days later his wife, who worked for him and she was also a piece of work, randomly congratulated me for my upcoming PhD position.
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  • This may seem inconsequential but it actually proved my plot had worked. I found out the following bit from talking to others.
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  • In the words of Monk - here's what happened... Shortly after I had dropped off the enchanting gift in Odo's lab he had gone over to my boss and expressed total confusion.
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  • Taking the higher road is easier said than done. Sometimes you are so frustrated with someone, you want to make them feel how they make you feel. However, you're better than that. Just confuse them with your brilliance and kindness!

  • He could not figure out why I was being nice to him and his first conclusion was that surely I wanted something, perhaps I had been fishing for a job.
    via Novel-Structure-2359
  • My boss informed him that I would have had no motive to do that as I already had a very desirable PhD position starting in a few months.
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  • This just deepened his bewilderment. I wish I could have seen the look on his face when he realised I had been nice to him for exactly no valid reason.
    via Novel-Structure-2359

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