Bride finds out on social media that mother-in-law threw secret party for brothers-in-law 31st birthday during couple’s wedding reception: 'She actively stole our guests'

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  • "MiL throws a secret birthday party for BiL during our wedding"

    I need to vent to people who understand how unbelievably ride this is. This happened at my wedding recently (UK based).
  • The background is a bit messy, but here's the rundown of the circumstances: The Lead-Up and MiL's Attitude The Date: Our wedding fell on my husband's youngest brother's 31st birthday.
  • We knew this when we booked and often joked it would be the most expensive birthday party he'd ever have.
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  • The Legal Bit: We had a celebrant-led ceremony on the main day, but legally signed the register the day before with just our moms present.
  • My MiL was confused by this, kept insisting she'd pay for a larger room at the registry office so more people could attend which we didn't want.
  • We wanted to celebrate with our nearest and dearest on our wedding day. The MiL however kept referring to our main wedding day as "the wedding after-party." It felt like she was constantly diminishing the importance of the day we were most excited about.
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  • The Drama: We'd already had a nightmare wedding run-up due to false accusations and family drama that resulted in my husband's sister (a bridesmaid) being uninvited, and we weren't even sure the MiL or Stepdad would attend.
  • My Gesture: I genuinely like my brother-in-law. Knowing it was his birthday, I surprised him during the speeches by getting the whole room to sing 'Happy Birthday' to him.
  • It was a lovely, celebratory moment. The Audacity: The Secret Party The main reception was in full swing.
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  • Just before we were due to cut the cake and have our first dance, my brother came over.
  • He was looking for us, but he'd noticed a significant group of people were missing: My MiL, Stepdad, both Groomsmen (including the birthday boy!), a boyfriend, and several other family members.
  • He eventually found them. They weren't just chatting; they were having a secret party in the small cottage on site where the brothers were staying.
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  • My MiL had pre- prepared and brought in a full buffet: champagne, several sandwich platters, crisps, and a cake.
  • She was hosting a party for a 31st birthday, right in the middle of our wedding reception.
  • My brother, who found them, didn't want to upset me on the day, so he just said they were found and didn't tell us they were having a full-blown party.
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  • TH
  • I later found out by seeing a picture on Facebook of one of the birthday party guests.
  • They were obviously gone for a considerable amount of time. The fact that she took away her husband, her sons, and other guests right before the cake cutting just solidifies how little respect she had for the day.
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  • She didn't just shade our day by calling it an 'after- party'; she actively stole our guests and key members of our wedding party to make a statement that her son's 31st birthday was a more important event.
  • It's truly staggering entitlement.

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