Employee refuses to share bonus with entitled parents after they wasted money on luxury items they can't afford: 'They've mismanaged their finances, and now they want me to bail them out!'

Author image for Ben Weiss
Ben Weiss • Writer and Editor
Nov 18, 2025 11:00 PM EST

This daughter worked tirelessly for a well-deserved bonus at work, only for her parents to pressure her into giving them a portion of it because of their own financial mistakes.

Sure, parents make tons of sacrifices for their kids when they're young, but there shouldn't be an expectation of reciprocity later in life. If the point of having kids for you is to guilt them into making the same financial contributions you once made for them when they were dependent on you, then you probably shouldn't have been parents in the first place.

In this instance, this author had been saving to use some of her salary along with her end-of-year bonus to go on the vacation she never went on. Meanwhile, her parents recently went on a vacation of their own and bought a car they clearly could not afford. It's hard to justify that they deserve a share of their daughter's bonus when they do not work together and their financial concerns are a direct result of their own actions.

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    An adult woman speaks to her senior father over coffee while sitting at a table.
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    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Sure, it would be one thing if the author's parents experienced a series of shortcomings that were outside of their control. However, these guys clearly do not know how to take care of themselves, and at this point, that should not be the daughter's concern. She has probably spent years dealing with the irresponsible behavior of her parents. Why should she have to give up her hard-earned money for them too?

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    "[Am I wrong] for not sharing my bonus with my parents after they spent all of theirs?"

    I (27F) have always been close with my parents, but lately, I've been feeling frustrated with them. Last year, I got a large work bonus, and after months of saving and budgeting, I was
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    planning to finally use it for a vacation I've been dreaming of. I've been. putting it off for years because I've always been the one to help when my parents needed financial assistance.
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    Well, this year, I thought things were different. My parents also received a bonus-at least as large as mine-and they promised to use it wisely. But instead, they've blon it all on
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    unnecessary purchases- expensive electronics, a new car for my mom, and even a week-long stay at a luxury resort. I didn't mind at first because I thought, "It's their money, let them enjoy it."
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    However, a few weeks ago, they came to me, saying that they were struggling with bills and asked if I could lend them some money.
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    I was shocked, but I agreed to help at first. I gave them a smaller amount, thinking they might have just hit a rough patch. But the next month, they came back asking for more. And then
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    again, and again. They started saying things like, "We've always been there for you, you should help us now." The guilt trip started, with them saying that I should be supporting family in times
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    of need, especially since I have a steady job and my finances are stable.
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    At first, I felt bad. But the more they came back to me asking for money, the more I started questioning if I was being.
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    used. When I told them that I really needed to hold onto my bonus for future plans, they
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    accused me of being selfish and uncaring. My dad, who has always been the one to call me
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    "the responsible one," started to criticize me for not living up to the family standard of "helping out when it counts." I can't shake the feeling that they've mismanaged
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    their finances, and now they want me to bail them out. I don't want to be the one to enable them, but
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    the guilt of not helping them keeps creeping in. My friends have been telling me that I should
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    just let them figure it out on their own, but my mom keeps texting me, saying how ashamed she is that I won't help and that she's disappointed in me. AITAH for not sharing my bonus with them?
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    A woman embraces her older father and hands him a present.
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 18
    Chic_alice · 10h ago • . NTAH. You're not obligated to share your bonus.
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    honeycrullerrr • 9h ago • You earned that bonus through your hard work, and you have the right to decide how to use it, especially when you've been saving for something important
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    to you, like a vacation you've been dreaming of. You've been financially responsible for years, and it's okay to take some time to prioritize your own needs and wants.
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family drama entitled parents employee bonus work family feud parenting family money Parenting Fail entitled people
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