Entitled mom refuses to let her son go to friend's birthday party after being told she can't bring the entire family to the event: ‘Either we all go or none of us go’

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  • Entitled parent refuses to let their child come to my child's birthday party unless the entire family gets to go

    My daughter is having a birthday party at an indoor water in 2 weeks and I texted one of her friends parents to confirm that he would be there and ask if a parent would be staying with him.
  • The response I got back: I think we may plan for all of us and we'll pay extra if needed.
  • Uh, huh? I was really confused by this because she has 4 other kids (2 of are toddlers) and my daughter (turning 9) has never hung out with them.
  • Her son has come to my daughter's birthday parties the last 3 years in a row; the first 2 years he came by himself and the last year his dad stayed with him.
  • We're renting a party room and we're only allowed 30 guests; we currently have 25. I respond: Ok, that sounds cool.
  • Just to let you know the party room does have a max capacity and we're still receiving rspvs so we are limiting it to who was invited and one parent if needed.
  • You are welcome to pay for the rest of your family and hang out at a table around the water park if you'd like She responds: Oh okay.
  • We might skip it then. If only one parent and kid is limit. Because there's two parents involved here.
  • Idk that sounds crazy. I'm sorry. Me: I'm sorry, we have 26 people coming already and there could be more RSVPs.
  • They limit us to 30. Her: my fiance and both just like to be involved with our children so if only 1 can come we'll have to pass.
  • I'm sorry. We'll plan something else I guess. Me: your son has come to her parties by himself or with your fiance and it's never been an issue before?
  • Sorry, I'm a little confused... You can definitely come, but only one parent and the invited child will be welcomed into the party room so that we can be compliant with capacity policies.
  • Her: well, I have a new policy for my family and it's either we all go or none of us go.
  • When I throw parties, I just host at my house so that everyone can come; every kid and their family.
  • I would never separate people from their kids. I used to be okay with dropping him off, but I'm not doing that anymore.
  • He has two parents that love and support him and we both deserve to be there to support him.
  • Me: A.) interesting that you claim to invite everyone to your parties that you host and out of the 3 years we've known you, we've never received an invitation.
  • B.) support him? Support him for what? He's here to celebrate his friend turning a year older, what kind of support does he need!
  • C.) if you have this new policy for your family, why not just rent your own party room so that your son can spend time with you all as a family while simultaneously spending time with his friend for her birthday, instead of expecting me to find extra space and money to accommodate your entire family.
  • Oh then she got pissed. Told me I was heartless and that her son would never be allowed to go any other parties we host blah, blah, blah.
  • I don't even care what she thinks about me, it's not half as bad as what I think about her!
  • I felt like I was arguing with a child that had just decided it was opposite day!
  • You can't just invite your entire family to your kid's friend's birthday party! The entitlement was palpable!
  • Dangerous-Name-220 I'm feel bad for the son for having a mom like that.
  • OP Sufficient-Reply9525 And he is the sweetest kid! I had him a lot over the summer because she would drop him off at 8am and pick him up around 6. He is very kind to my daughter and I'm bummed that he won't be there
  • Lissypooh628 Honestly, this back and forth went on too long. When she replied "we might skip it if only one kid/1 parent can come"..... that should have been the end of it. "Ok (daughter) will miss (your son) at the party, but we understand." She sounds coocoo for cocoa puffs and that poor kid will not get invited to things because of her new "policy".
  • OP Sufficient-Reply9525 You're right. I love her kid like my own so I was fighting for him, but I know I let it go too far.
  • TigerBelmont Make sure any playdates are at your house.
  • Internal_Set_6564 She was odd and you are right to set limits. Honestly you gave her more time than I would. I would have dropped it after the first refusal and not continued to press her as she had never invited you to anything. Folks who make up rules like "we now only do X" are typically not going to come up with rational responses.
  • OP Sufficient-Reply9525 Yeah, I pushed because I really love her kid. But you're right. I should have just said "okay, have a great day!" Lesson learned
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