Mid-40s coworker living on parents’ expense constantly brags about money and success, making 24-year-old colleague increasingly annoyed by the nonstop ego show: ‘For some reason, he sees himself as a mentor to me, giving me advice on life’

Author image for Etai Eshet
Etai Eshet • Editor
Dec 4, 2025 10:00 AM EST

Offices always have at least one guy who treats the workplace like his own personal podcast. In this case, it is a mid-40s coworker who has been planted at the same job for 15 years, drives a flashy car, lives in his parents' apartment, and spends his days narrating how rich, connected, and important he supposedly is. Shady friends, sponsored vacations, hostile messages framed as jokes. It is less intimidating and more like being stuck next to a low-budget crime documentary that never ends.

What really grates is the self-assigned mentor role. Because the younger coworker is from a smaller city, this man decides he must be the wise urban success story, smarter than anyone else, here to teach life. The arrogance lands harder when the younger colleague actually comes from a self-made family, already knows how to work hard, and is not impressed by someone whose main achievement seems to be repeating the same story about powerful friends to whoever cannot escape the room.

There is also that quiet little sting of comparison. One loud, braggy man has been married twice, waves money around, and gets attention. A younger, more reserved coworker wonders if that is the trick. Act bigger, talk richer, pretend to have dangerous friends, maybe women will notice. The sad truth is this is not allure, it's noise. People do not respect it, they just tolerate it.

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  • Coworker keeps repeating how rich and powerful he is and is getting on my nerves

    A man in a suit wearing a gold crown makes a playful hand-gesture while winking and sticking out his tongue.
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    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I am 24 working in a new place for 6 months. I have this coworker mid 40s he has been working there for 15+ years.
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  • In most offices, the ones actually doing well are too busy living their lives to announce their greatness every five minutes. The rest are usually sitting at their parents' place, hyping up imaginary power between coffee breaks.

  • So basically when he is in the office he doesn't stop talking all the time. His favourite tale is how he has friends in high places in the mafia.
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  • He says he can have people killed if he wants it. I am not buying it yet it has gotten to my head and on my nerves and sometimes I wonder what would be like if I had powerful friends.
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  • He drives an expensive car and goes to vacations he says are paid by his mafia buddies.
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  • A man in a gray suit smiles while pointing at the gold crown on his head. You said: ChatGPT said: A man in a gray suit wearing a gold crown stands with his arms crossed, striking a proud, superior pose.
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  • He also does live in his parents apartment while I am from another city and have to rent.
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  • I was always taught to be quiet and never brag with wealth and I don't but I wonder (as a person who doesn't get much attention from women) whether this loud (I am the best) attitude will lead to attention from women.
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  • The guy is married for a second time (he divorced a couple of years ago) and his wife looks pretty normal.
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  • Additionally for some reason he sees himself as a mentor to me giving me advice on life saying things like: "he is smarter than anyone I know and that is why I should listen to his advice" because I am sure due to the fact I am from a smaller city he thinks my family are poor and uneducated when objectively my parents and most of my family are pretty smart and self- made like I am so I prefer to listen to them.
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  • pepperw2 I suspect knowing anyone in the Mafia would have similar rules as Fight Club. "The first rule about Mafia is, we never talk about Mafia" It sounds like he has low self esteem.
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  • OP Pale-Revolution-5151 He does give small energy vibes sometimes I do think I should tell him she he starts yapping how he will get people killed. He is also what it seems kinda scared like not talking any risk even for not dangerous things he is definitely not brave.
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  • A man in a gray suit smiles while pointing at the gold crown on his head.
    via AJR_photo

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • lun4d0r4 Tell HR he is threatening people with his mafia connections. That it's an unsafe workplace now. There's literally no other way to interpret that until he admits he's been full of shit lying to everyone.
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  • OP Pale-Revolution-5151 Believe me they won't bat an eyelash despite it being their job they will say ignore it
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  • RobsonSweets He's lying. And the women who would be impressed by mafia connections (which are very much not women you want to date unless you want a sugar baby) wouldn't give the time of day to a man living with his parents, and women who wouldn't care about him living at home would be put off by a man who's either profitting off crime, or loudly lying about profitting off crime. I guarantee you that this man gets 0 attention from any self- respecting women because they think he's an annoying cr
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  • OP Pale-Revolution-5151 He is on marriage number 2 with a younger and reasonably attractive wife.
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  • zaskar He's also got severe self esteem issues and maybe a tiny dick. He's making up for those. It's real mental health issues. Best thing you can do is nod. Maybe make going to a therapist a cool thing in your office.
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  • OP Pale-Revolution-5151 He does give small * energy vibes always making obscure comments that are not something that one wants to hear at work
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  • lun4d0r4 Do you have a worksafe/ fairwork type of regulatory body you could report it to?
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  • OP Pale-Revolution-5151 No
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  • lun4d0r4 Damn that sucks. Wanna go petty? You could organise everyone to join a union and raise a complaint together or all find new jobs and quit on the same day with his 'threats' as the reason.
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  • OP Pale-Revolution-5151 I do think I am the only one that pays any attention to him so don't think anyone cares about him let alone to quit because of him
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  • RobsonSweets Yeah, there's plenty of non-self- respecting women out there to marry these bozos for a while. The women he's capable of picking up aren't the ones you want to date. Stop thinking in numbers of women and start thinking about the type of woman.
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  • OP Pale-Revolution-5151 I understand yet a guy can talk smack like that in front of his coworkers and be a different person in front of his wife like a nice to talk person.
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  • Dependent-Hurry9808 Remind him there's always a bigger fish.
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  • OP Pale-Revolution-5151 He says he is friends with the biggers fish.
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  • 313378008135 He's a fantasist who has a nice car and vacations because he lives with his parents / at his parents place and has low outgoings. People who are entwined with organised crime do not go around boasting about it.
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  • BadHeartburn Not the kind of attention you want, bud. I assure you, everybody thinks he's as much of a douche as you do. Nobody who's actually connected to the mafia goes around bragging about being connected to the mafia. And he's probably in severe debt from all the vacations his mafia buddies didn't pay for.
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management terrible coworkers workplace discussion employment issues boss workplace-stories hr manager bosses work coworkers colleague PTO managers supervisor workplace Horrible Bosses work-life balance
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