47-year-old father of 14-year-old refuses to take son on art museum trip because 39-year-old stepmother disagrees: 'My wife tried to tell him why we were saving the money'

Author image for Remy Millisky
Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Dec 15, 2025 11:00 AM EST

This dad is a little confused about why his 14-year-old son isn't getting along with him, but the answer is clear to the people answering his question! 

When you're a teenager, it's natural to disagree with your parents on, well, almost everything. You're learning about the world while growing from a kid into a very young adult. If parents are able to do fun activities with their teen that the teen actually enjoys, they should lean into it! Too bad that's the opposite of what this dad is doing. All his son wants to do is carry on a tradition that he used to do with his late mom, who passed when he was 12. He loved going to the British Museum in London, which Dad describes as both his "favorite place in the world" and the center of an ongoing passion project he had with his mother. This passion project sounds so cool — the teen and his Mom would sketch out different things they saw in the museum, recreating them together. It's an activity that could inspire a love of art, a deeper understanding of the world around him, and an appreciation for history (and not to mention that it was a tradition he kept up with his mom, which is probably the key element here for that 14-year-old). 

Dad doesn't see it that way at all, and commenters ripped him a new one for the way he treated his son. Oh, and he provided an update, which is almost as infuriating as the original post he shared. He's really letting his new wife run the show, and commenters were quick to express surprise at how quickly he'd remarried, even deciding to have another child with her, all within a couple years of his wife's passing! 

While obviously no one can predict the future, numerous commenters warned that this kid is going to go no-contact with Dad as soon as he can, and who could blame him? I hope he surrounds himself with friends who want to continue on with he and his Mom's legacy project, as well as just people who listen to him and respect his wishes. 

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  • 01
    Father with gray hair embraces young son on yellow couch
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02
    I (47M) have a son (14M) from a previous marriage to my late wife. She passed two years ago and for my son the wound is still very fresh. My son and her were very close as they look exactly alike and had a lot of the same interest in reading, history, and art. Their favorite place in the world is the British Museum in London. Their passion project has been redrawing peices from the museum for the last two years before. For the last four years for
    via u/Creepy_Werewolf_4914
  • 03
    my wife's birthday in June and my son's birthday in December we go to England for a week so they can spend time in the museum. However Since she died, my son and I have continued going for his birthday. The problem is with my new wife (39F). Shes only been with us on this annual trip once last year and she complained the whole time. Now however, we recently found out we are expecting a child. together in May. She raised it to
    via u/Creepy_Werewolf_4914
  • 04
    my attention that the money I've used for the trip could be better used to be saved for the baby and we could instead do something else for my son's birthday. I thought about it and I agreed. I was worried how he'd take it as this is the only thing he wants for his birthday. He dosent ask for gifts or cake, or a party. All he cares about is this goddam museum
    via u/Creepy_Werewolf_4914
  • 05
    We broke the news to my son yesterday and he flipped out. He was so upset and when my wife tried to tell him why we were saving the money and where the money was going to, he said he didn't give a damn and we got into an argument about it. He said he was upset because if he didn't go this year he'd miss the new exhibit he'd been wanting to see, and he accused my wife of doing this on purpose because
    via u/Creepy_Werewolf_4914
  • 06
    "she already dosent like me" he said. I admit I yelled at him and he started crying and for the last 24 hours, he hasn't spoken to me. Am I the asshole?
    via u/Creepy_Werewolf_4914
  • 07
    Update- So a year ago I (48M) made a post online about the issue I was having with my son (15M) and my new wife (40F). I've gotten many messages and comments asking what happened so I decided to make an update. So the big thing first: did I take my son on his birthday trip? No but Let me explain.
    via u/Creepy_Werewolf_4914
  • 08
    So, after my son and I got into a fight, he went and complained to his uncle, my late wife's older brother (47M) and his husband (47M). I'll go ahead and say that since my late wife got sick and even after she died, her brother and I never got along. He, his husband, and most of her family like to judge me for how quickly I remarried. However my son has kept a good relationship with them, and once he told them about what happened, they
    via u/Creepy_Werewolf_4914
  • 09
    called and offered to take him themselves. I was all for it, but my wife was not. She thought if we let my son go with them, they'd fill his head with lies about her and only deepen the rift between us. Since this situation was causing her so much stress, and she was pregnant at the time, I decided to decline their offer, which only made things worse.
    via u/Creepy_Werewolf_4914
  • 10
    Eventually, after about 3 days, we finally sat down and talked. He said he was unhappy with the way she was treating him, and often felt like she was trying to erase his mom's touch from the house. He felt like she was constantly criticising him and didn't want him around. When I confronted my wife about this, she was offended. She said she wasn't trying to erase his mother, but simply add her own touch to the space. She wasn't
    via u/Creepy_Werewolf_4914
  • 11
    criticizing him, simply parenting. Eventually, my son accepted that he wouldn't be able to go on his trip and was noticeably bummed out about it. So his boyfriend and his friends spent his birthday at our house, trying to cheer him up. A sweet gesture but I don't think it worked. Over the last year, my wife had our baby, and now that my son's birthday is approaching, he's
    via u/Creepy_Werewolf_4914
  • 12
    become more bitter and resentful over what happened last year. He spends more time away from home, he's been rude and disrespectful to his stepmother, and been seeing his therapist more frequently. Now that we've all adjusted to having a new baby, and my son's birthday is approaching again, I'm thinking if I should resume the tradition of taking my son back to the meuseum. I think it would be a good idea to hopefully do some
    via u/Creepy_Werewolf_4914
  • 13
    Man with gray hair in jean jacket points at laptop, next to him is young boy with black and white shirt who also looks at laptop
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 14
    family bonding, and honestly I'm feeling really guilty about what happened last year. My wife has her reservations for saying it would only reward his "bad behavior" I guess I'm making this update to not only inform the people of Reddit, but also ask for a little advice if it's allowed. What should I do? I only want to be a better dad.
    via u/Creepy_Werewolf_4914
  • 15
    crocodilezebramilk • Your shiny new wife chose to act worse than a whiny toddler and ruined a trip that we meant for a CHILD, on their birthday, as a memory for his mother. • You allowed this woman to make your son feel terrible in his favourite place in the world, on his birthday.
    via u/crocodilezebramilk
  • 16
    • You allowed this woman to take the one thing your child has ever wanted, to shift it over to something that has nothing to do with your son, for his birthday. • You yelled at your son for reacting badly to being shoved aside for your new family. • You allow your new wife to mistreat your son, not even bothering to
    via u/crocodilezebramilk
  • 17
    raise any question at "she hates me" at all. Of. Course. YTA.
    via u/crocodilezebramilk
  • 18
    tem... YTA. Your wife died two years ago. One year ago, you brought your new wife on this trip. So you were remarried within a year of your son's mother's death? Not just dating, but actually planned and had a wedding?
    via u/temperedolive
  • 19
    And brought this new wife on his first trip back to the museum since his mother died? And now he can't go because you're having a baby. Hope you like the new kid a whole lot because you won't see much of your first one in the future.
    via u/temperedolive

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stepmother entitled parents art mother teenagers Father
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