Parents give 17-year-old and sister a car for Christmas, get upset when she asks for another gift because she won't be able to use it: 'It won't benefit me in any way'

Author image for Ally Perry
Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
Dec 29, 2025 12:00 PM EST

It can be frustrating to have to share, but not everybody gets a choice in the matter.

Anybody who has grown up with siblings will understand the annoyance that comes with parents insisting that you have to take turns, and this is something that can go far beyond fighting over toys when you are preschool age. From receiving hand-me-down clothes and technology to splitting up who gets what with the inheritance, having brothers or sisters almost always means that many things that parents give you will never be for you alone.

It is not a bad thing to learn how to share, as the multitude of selfish and entitled people that society is plagued with proves. Still, there are times when it does not make the most sense for parents to make kids split the ownership of certain things, especially as they get older. 

While finances may not always stretch far enough to ensure that everybody in the family gets one of everything, there are ways to make everyone feel like they are catered to and not being left behind. That being said, though, sometimes people have no choice but to make the best of what they have got. It proves a crucial learning experience when growing up.

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  • a young girl with long dark hair sits behind the wheel of a white car
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • As kids get older and more independent, the prospect of having to share with a sibling can only become more frustrating, even when that is the only option they have. It can be a difficult part of both parenting and adolescence. 

    In this story, a teenager became annoyed when her parents gifted her and her sister a secondhand car for Christmas. She felt that it was more of a gift for her sister than for her, as it was she who would be able to get the most use out of the vehicle. 

    As a result, the girl felt like she had been left out of the gifting process. She explained her reasoning to her parents and asked if it was possible for her to have a separate gift. Her mom and dad got upset at this, and she wasn't sure if she had handled the situation the right way. She looked for a second opinion.

  • Am I wrong for asking my parents for another gift after they bought a car for me and my sister that I won't be able to use?

    My parents bought my sister and me a car for Christmas. It's a 2015 Ford Taurus. We're both 17 and seniors in high school.
    via Any_Opening_2603
  • Before November, my sister and I were 'sharing' my mom's car to get to school. Since my mom started her new job in November, we've mostly had to ride the bus. My classes are at a different school than my sister's because I'm taking dual enrollment classes.
    via Any_Opening_2603
  • My schedule: A days (Mon/Wed/Fri): 8:30am-10:20am Ride the bus back to my home based school and wait in the office until band, 1pm-2:30pm I Work 5pm-9pm B days (Tue/Thu): 8:30am-10:20am classes
    via Any_Opening_2603
  • a young girl looks to the road ahead as she sits in the driver's seat of a car with her hands on the wheel
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Ride the bus back to my home-based school, then walk to my job Work 12pm-5pm My sister's schedule: A days: 7:30am-11:04am school, 12pm-5pm B days: 7:30am-12:30pm school, 1pm-6pm work on Tuesdays, off Thursdays Weekends: she works Saturdays, I don't
    via Any_Opening_2603
  • Because her school and work schedule are different from mine, she will have the car whenever she needs it. Even when school starts back, the schedule will stay the same. I won't be able to use the car except maybe on Thursdays, but I dont have a parking pass and students can't stay in the building without classes. So even on Thursdays, I can't realistically use the car because I have to sign out and leave.
    via Any_Opening_2603
  • The car was supposed to be for both of us, but in reality, it's mostly useful to my sister. I've been walking to work since my junior year because I didn't have transportation. My sister just started her job in September, which is 12 miles away, the car couldn't be used for me at all. And now, even with our own car, it wont benefit me in anyway.
    via Any_Opening_2603
  • I told my parents I feel the gift is primarily for my sister. They said they saved up for a car for both of us and want me to be happy about it, but I don't see the point of being happy about something I can't actually use. That was the only thing we got for Christmas. I asked my parents if I'D be able to get something else that I would be able to enjoy and they looked upset about it and told me to just wait until school starts back.
    via Any_Opening_2603
  • A set of car keys lying on top of a car dashboard
    via Bence Balla-Schottner
  • Broad Respond_2205 This isn't "isn't an option" it's her being selfish and you're letting her. She has options, you can absolutely establish shared custody. PS what does she mean "doesn't want to pay gas money"??? Does she think when you drive your own car, you don't need to pay for your own gas?????
    via Broad_Respond_2205
  • OP Any_Opening_2603 >Does she think when you drive your own car, you don't need to pay for your own gas????? She was giving her friend $20 for gas, but she felt that was too much because her friend doesn't live near us. Her friend had to drive back to drop my sister off and then drive back toward where she lives.
    via Any_Opening_2603
  • Kmmkristin So your sister and you were both managing without a car before this Christmas gift? Can't you each manage while it is the others turn to have the car? Alternate days or weeks? Is there something that prevents that type of sharing? Am I missing something?
    via Kmmkristiin
  • OP Any_Opening_2603 Yes, before Christmas, we were both managing fine without a car. After our mom took her car back, we rode the bus, and I walked to work, and my sister rode with her friend. Nothing changed for me besides my sister's transportation of getting to work. Sharing the new car isn't really an option because my sister doesn't want to ride with her friend now that we have a car and my sister doesn't want to keep paying her friend gas money.
    via Any_Opening_2603
  • Lower-Elk8395 Question, if I may; why is her schedule the only one being considered for the car? Why not at least try and make it fair by alternating weeks?
    via Lower-Elk8395
  • OP Any_Opening_2603 >why is her schedule the only one being considered for the car? My parents said they weren't considering anyone's schedule when they got us the car, they just assumed this would help us both since my mom started working again. >Why not at least try and make it fair by alternating weeks? I would be open to it. My sister doesn't want that. If I keep the car she is without transportation, if she keeps the car I am without transportation. I get out of school earlier/ later than s
    via Any_Opening_2603
  • cfernan43 You can't get one? How did you manage when you had your mom's car?
    via cfernan43
  • OP Any_Opening_2603 My sister kept the car, i just road the bus to my other school. >You can't get one? I'm not sure, I'll have to check. We'll have to update the pass anyway because we aren't using my mom's car anymore.
    via Any_Opening_2603
  • Broad Respond_2205 After reading your comment, you don't have a real reason not to share the car. Different schedules and "but my gas money" isn't a real reason. Your parents gave a car to both of you, they didn't force you to give up your share for no reason. Your sister is the AH and you're the dumbass.
    via Broad_Respond_2205
  • Relatents It is both of yours car, right? Therefore you should have the use of it half the time. If the bus worked for both of you before, it should still work for both of you now. Plan a few days that would be best for you and still functional for her, and suggest the new sharing plan. What can your parents say against it especially if you give her more days then you take for yourself? If they refuse your reasonable request and won't give you any time with the car, then they've shown you their
    via Relatants
  • MisterFrancesco Why does your sister have priority? If you take the bus, she can take it too. Plan to use the car every other week.
    via MisterFrancesco

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family drama car sisters teenagers siblings gift family parents
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