Aunt refuses to pick up her 13-year-old niece from party at 3 AM, no questions asked: 'It would be crazy to not have questions.'

She said she'd pick her up, but not without questions.

As parents, it's essential to make your teenagers feel like they can come to you about anything. Teens cannot address all of their problems on their own, and if they can be vulnerable with their parents about the issues that are ailing them, they will be better able to cope with the most challenging years of their lives. Convincing teens that it's safe to talk to their parents can be borderline impossible to do because there is always a power imbalance between an adult parent and a minor child. It doesn't matter how cool and chill your mom is: she can ground you if you do something wrong while living under her roof. If something horrible happened to you at a party you weren't supposed to attend, you might not feel comfortable seeking support for the former because you're afraid of getting in trouble for the latter. 

Some parents try to make their teens feel comfortable telling them things by punishing them very sparingly.  If a teenager can see their parent as a confidant who won't get angry at them for the most minor transgressions, they might be more willing to rebel and behave badly, but they also might be more likely to tell their parents what's really going on instead of lying to them. If a kid thinks their parent will freak out if they do one thing wrong, there's no way they will confide in them.

Author image for Emmy Pratt Emmy Pratt
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