Couple invites friend to a concert, only for her to back out last minute, they sell her ticket, then keep the money instead of giving it back to her: ‘She abandoned the ticket’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Feb 3, 2026 2:00 PM EST

Should the friend get the money back for her ticket even if she made no attempt to sell it herself?

Every time a group of friends plans something together, one person ends up initially paying for the whole thing. They act like they are fine with it, while they silently pray that everyone will pay them back without being chased. Whether it is concert tickets or a restaurant bill, it's much easier to have one person pay and for the rest to pay them back their portion.

At least it's easier on paper. In real life, there are always complications. There is always the one friend who never pays back, or someone who suddenly backs out of plans and demands their money back. Suddenly, the person who paid becomes a part of a dramatic fallout they never planned, simply because they were kind enough to offer to put their card down first.

This brings us to the dilemma in the story below. A husband and wife planned to go to a concert with a friend, so the husband bought tickets for all of them. The friend paid him back in cash.

So far, so good, right?

A day before the concert, the friend suddenly backed out of going. Since the physical ticket was in the husband's hands, he offered the friend to come over and take it so she could try to sell it, but the friend was not interested in doing so. For all she cared, the ticket could be thrown away and go to complete waste. The husband, on the other hand, didn't want to give up so easily. This led him to find a buyer himself and sell the ticket, and so he did. He made the deal and sold the friend's ticket all by himself.

Since he was the one who did all the work, the husband thought it was only fair that he would keep the money from the sale. It didn't matter to him that the friend already paid him back for the ticket; he wanted the profit from the sale itself, since it was his initiative to sell it in the first place. However, his wife thinks it's not the right move and that the money should return to the friend who still technically owns the ticket.

Should the husband keep the money, or give it back to the friend?

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  • Concept for cancelled entertainment events with concert tickets and red 'cancelled' stamp on them
    via Firn

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • AITA for keeping the money from a ticket sale after the buyer backed out and abandoned it?

    My wife, her friend, and I planned to go to a concert this past weekend. I'll call the friend "Julie." A few months ago, I bought three tickets all together.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • Julie paid us back in cash for her ticket. The day before the concert, Julie suddenly backed out.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • By that point, I had already picked up the physical tickets. At first, we told Julie she could still come pick up her ticket if she wanted to sell it or do something else with it.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • She didn't. She made no effort to retrieve it. We even tried to find a buyer for her ourselves, but nothing worked out right away.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • After that, Julie told us to just keep the ticket or throw it away. I thought tossing it was a complete waste, so I decided to find a buyer myself and sell it.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • I ended up doing the coordination, messaging, and logistics to make the sale happen. Here's where the conflict is: I think I should keep the money from the sale because Julie abandoned the ticket and explicitly said to keep it or throw it away, and she made zero effort to handle it.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • My wife thinks keeping the money makes me the asshole and that I should give Julie the money (or at least offer it to her).
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • People at an Outdoor Concert
    via halfpoint

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • AITA? Edit: I've clarified with my wife that her "friend" is actually just a coworker. I've never met this person.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • If she was an actual friend, this would be a different story - I'd offer the money back.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • Edit 2: A lot of the "YTA" takes seem based on the idea that I made my wife's work situation stressful.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • I agree with that premise. If this had created any stress for her at work, I wouldn't have done it.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • But my wife isn't worried about workplace fallout. My wife still thinks selling the ticket and keeping the money was an asshole move.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • I don't. We're posting here to settle a friendly debate.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • Stuff Old 1191 How much was the ticket? If it was 10 bucks I'd probably keep it, but if it was 100 and the person who paid for it was a friend, I'd return the cash (because they are a friend).
    via StuffOld1191
  • Original_Wish_9946 Original Poster's Reply It was about $195. I've never met this person myself and it turns out she's just my wife's coworker so not exactly a friend.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • JustBrowsing49 Info: why did she back out? Was there an unexpected conflict, or did she just not feel like going anymore?
    via JustBrowsing49
  • Original_Wish_9946 Original Poster's Reply She said she couldn't find a pet sitter. This had been planned for months. I offered to introduce her to 2 different pet sitters who could've helped her out. She never took the offer.
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • supermarino INFO: did the coworker actually ask for her money back, or the money you made selling it?
    via supermarino
  • Original_Wish_9946 Original Poster's Reply No
    via Original_Wish_9946
  • Scenarioing "Julie told us to just keep the ticket or throw it away." \---Julie decided to gift it. NTA.
    via Scenarioing
  • baobabfruit88 You paid for them first, -> yours. She pays it back, -> now it's hers. She then says keep it or throw it away -> now it's yours again. She has given up this ticket to you to do with as you see fit, take the money, have fun with it, and just tell her you threw it away. Problem solved. Your wife is just afraid Julie will find out and be an a about it.
    via baobabfruit88
  • Unlikely_Channel478 NTA; Other person relinquished all value of the ticket by telling you to keep it. Under that understanding, if someone tells you to keep something (or throw it away) than you are free to do with it what you please.
    via Unlikely_Channel478
  • shfeba She said to throw it away. She doesn't want the money. You did all the work from the first ticket purchase. You get the money.
    via shfeba
  • RevolutionaryHalf538 This is one of those "technically NTA", but really? Just give the friend the money. Pat yourself on the back for doing this person a solid and bank the life karma.
    via RevolutionaryHalf538

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friendship work coworkers concert friends relationships purchase couples ticket money selling
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