Coworker goes through colleague's phone and finds texts calling her annoying, starts spreading rumors about her in the office: 'I never leave my phone out in the open, so that means she had to go through my stuff to get it.'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Feb 2, 2026 8:00 PM EST

If she can prove that she actually read her texts, she could get herself fired. 

One of my biggest fears is someone hacking into my phone and reading all of my nefarious texts. It's not like I'm confessing to anything that will put me behind bars in my texts, but I have definitely said things that I wouldn't say in mixed company. The price of community is annoyance. Let's just say I've got a pretty large community around me, and I can't love everyone in it. It's crucial to get negative feelings out of my system, and ranting to my friends is my preferred way to do it. Who among us doesn't have those friends with whom we text every little thought, no matter how dastardly? We all have a right to privacy, and sometimes expressing your frustration to someone else is the one thing keeping you from taking it out on the person you're frustrated with. 

I can admit that I have negative feelings towards some people, even if they haven't technically done anything wrong. It doesn't make you a horrible person if you don't like someone, but you shouldn't be openly cruel to them if they have never wronged you. I know better than anybody that it's not always easy to pretend like you like somebody when you don't, especially when they can see on your face that you don't really care for them. 99% of the time, it's best not to tell them directly that you don't like them. After all, would you really appreciate your coworker telling you they don't like you when you could already tell? 

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  • Young woman smiling while using her smartphone at desk
    via Vitaly Gariev

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The coworker in this story could probably tell that her colleague didn't like her, but instead of just accepting it, she stole her phone, went through her texts, and found that she had called her annoying when texting her sister. Now, she's spreading rumors about her throughout the workplace and being generally unfriendly towards her.

  • My coworker went through my phone, and read my texts calling her annoying.

    I'm beyond pissed right now. So there's this coworker (I'll just dub B) who I've personally never liked, our personalities just clash and she does a bunch of stuff that annoys me on a personal level.
    via u/Adorable-Calendar-19
  • But I've never let those personal feelings turn me into a rude person. I treated her cordially like I would any other coworker, if I was doing the coffee run and she was in the vicinity I'd offer to get her some too, if she talked to me I made polite conversation.
    via u/Adorable-Calendar-19
  • Three women talking at a cafe with drinks
    via Vitaly Gariev

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Well one day out of the blue she suddenly started acting extremely rude to me. Even started spreading rumors too.
    via u/Adorable-Calendar-19
  • I ignored it. It was annoying yes but it didn't affect my work and my coworkers treated me the same.
    via u/Adorable-Calendar-19
  • Yesterday a coworker pulled me aside to talk privately. I found out why B was being so petty.
    via u/Adorable-Calendar-19
  • Whenever I need to rant I text my sister. We rant back and forth, have a little kiki and go about our days.
    via u/Adorable-Calendar-19
  • So the coworker told me that B told them something that alarmed them. And it was that B had gone through my phone!
    via u/Adorable-Calendar-19
  • First, I don't even know how she got into it in the first place, I keep it locked at all times.
    via u/Adorable-Calendar-19
  • Second, if I don't have eyes on my phone I NEVER leave it out in the open, so that means she had to go through my stuff to get it.
    via u/Adorable-Calendar-19
  • A locked phone screen
    via Curated Lifestyle (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • So she saw the texts between me and my sister and got pissed. Well guess who's pissed now too?!
    via u/Adorable-Calendar-19
  • I've already scheduled a meeting with HR. I was gonna let all the petty BS go, but she crossed a line invading my privacy like that.
    via u/Adorable-Calendar-19
  • And let me not forget to mention we're adults, in our early 30s'. And she's older than me.
    via u/Adorable-Calendar-19
  • PartysTime504 This is absolutely UNHINGED behavior. 100% a violation of your space, privacy, and rights in the workplace. I would not rest u til she is shit-canned
    via u/PartysTime504
  • mocha_madness_ It's worth asking your colleague who told you if she's happy to go on the record with what she's said. HR will most likely need a statement or something to pursue the matter formally.
    via u/mocha_madness_
  • Keggerbev Whatever line of work that is, you need to report it immediately and file a grievance. That's very unhinged behaviour.
    via u/Keggerbev
  • animalmad72 HR is the right move here. Going through your locked phone is a serious boundary and you should frame it as a privacy/security issue, not just coworker drama. After that, keep your phone on you or in a locked drawer and move any venting to somewhere she absolutely cant access.
    via u/animalmad72
  • Jaebear_1996 Yep, number one reason I keep my phone on me or around me. If I leave, it comes with me. Even to the bathroom. One of my problem coworkers has gone through my work desktop emails when I forgot to close out between logging and doing a guest transaction. I only knew because I had a few emails I knew were unread and came back to them read and gone (bc i have it sent to go into a folder after reading). And then after finding selfies in my phone a year and half ago, I take my phone with
    via u/Jaebear_1996
  • Classic_Math_2400 You're taking the right step by reporting this to HR. However, if the allegations are based solely on hearsay about her accessing your phone, it'll be challenging to substantiate them. Without concrete evidence, particularly if you claim to always keep your phone with you, it could escalate the situation. When you meet with HR, ensure you present only factual information. Additionally, please provide Ava with a list of other behaviors that are impacting your well-being. Wishing
    via u/Classic_Math_2400
  • SunknTresr Im just curious why you believe this co-worker that told you the other coworker went thru your phone? Especially when you know its always kept locked & secured. Its possible the coworker that snitched is lying about the other coworker
    via u/SunknTresr
  • erehpsgov In the civilised countries that I have been living in, this is a felony crime, and by no means a venial offence...
    via u/erehpsgov

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snooping rumors stealing annoying coworkers texts phone employees colleague human resources
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