16-year-old hockey player refuses to return to her former robotics team after the 51-year-old coach kicked her out: 'Dave demanded I come back to the team. I said no. You can’t kick me off a team, then beg me to come back?'

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    Two students work together on a complex machine
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    Am I the bad guy for not returning to a robotics team after getting kicked off?

    I (16F) was apart of a robotics team for 2 years. Before it was a robotics team I was in the tech team.
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    I mainly did it because I had an interest in STEM (living in a rural area it's hard to find anything close to clubs that relate to it) and some of my friends were in it as well.
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    I also play ice hockey, and I've had a commitment to my team and playing hockey for longer than I was apart of the robotics team, since I hoped to one day play college hockey.
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    However, my hockey team got the short end of the stick this year and a lot of games were out of town.
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    Our roster is pretty small as it is, and a lot of girls double roster, so if you can show up to a game, you need to.
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    A group of young people paying a game of ice hockey
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    My robotics team had meetings and practice on Saturdays, which on most Saturdays, I was playing hockey out of
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    The guy who runs the team had no issue with it, as long as I showed up for the actual meets because I'm one of the best speakers for the team.
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    I showed up to the actual meets, and did my job. Apparently however, I wasn't interacting enough with the other girls on the team, who I recently cut off except for necessary interactions due to personal reasons, which is not something I want to get into right now.
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    I stuck closer to the boys on the team, not because I had crushes on them, but because I found they were easier to talk to and i had never gotten to know them before.
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    Our team leader (51M) "Dave", decided I was only talking with the boys to try and get romantic with them.
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    That I was stunting team growth because of it. He kicked me off the team the following week, also with the argument that I didn't spend enough time on the robotics team, and spent too much time on hockey.
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    I remember feeling a sense of relief, because I wasn't planning on doing the robotics team next year and I was just glad it over soon.
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    The robotics team went to the state competition, I played hockey, and apparently they made it to a championship in Chicago this summer.
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    A group of students building and programming electric toys and robots at robotics classroom
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    Good for them. I returned my team shirt, my parents don't plan on sponsoring them anymore, neither do my grandparents, and I was content on focusing on hockey fully.
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    Dave however started to cal me every day, asking if I could design a new design for shirts and get my parents to buy them, as I did the logo work and my parents sponsored the gear and clothing we got.
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    I remember saying something along the lines of "not my problem anymore." Which... yeah a bit harsh.
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    Dave was livid however, because my aunt runs the business that makes the team shirts, my parents have always paid for them and I've always designed what goes on them.
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    Dave demanded I come back to the team. I said no. You can't kick me off a team, then beg me to come back???
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    Dave called me a spoiled brat, the girls I cut off are now texting me from different numbers calling me the B word and other such insults.
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    I don't know. I don't think I did anything wrong. AITA?
  • 24
    hyperspace_hussy So you have a 51 year old man calling you to harass you and your parents haven't called the cops yet? NTA at all. Call the cops and report him for harassment then call the school and file an official complaint of harassment with them also. Im not sure how it works where you are but in most places teachers are not allowed to contact students privately
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    snack-scream-repeat NTA. Report this both to your parents and to school authorities. This needs to be nipped in the bud now.
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    SpecialProfile2697 Your parents should be shutting that crop down immediately. If you haven't told them, do so. NTA
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    definitelynotfbi13 If a 51 year old man is really calling a 16 year old girl to disrespectfully make entitled demands for an extracurricular that he booted you from ... that's not a You problem. You tell your parents everything, and they will make it a Him Problem with an extra side of GTFO from the school board.
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    Dense_Abroad_4571 NTA. It's best you not return to the club. You know you're being used for your family contacts. I'm assuming this club is not a stand alone and is part of a larger organization (e.g. school, boys and girls club). It's time to contact the leadership in that organization and lay out exactly what's going on. BTW, great job on your writing skills.
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    FederalLie3196 NTAH. But this adult man needs shut down and the girls. A report to the sheriffs office and or prosecutor...by your parents, is required.

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